Reflections on Retirement

Posted on September 14, 2011 by a moment with god — Leave a comment

Koko Head reflected in the window of the Blu Water Grill

Good Morning, God!

Decompression (from my second retirement) is happening rather slowly — but it IS happening. My week seems a bit more free. My time is more my own. And, I have more time to share with others — yesterday celebrating (a bit early) a dear friend’s birthday!

What’s my view from this slower lane? Mostly wonderment that I didn’t move over sooner. Smile. Yes, God! I am a slow learner. Hmmm. And in some areas, a non-learner.

I need help, God, in not putting stuff into the spaces and places left open by retirement. Actually, an Event here or there hardly counts. What tired me at “work” was the ongoing nature of diverse responsibilities. What was “tiring” was never really ever being “done.” And having far more that needed doing than I had time or energy for.

Now, even as I say that, God, I realize that I was only aware of the “weight” after it was gone. Humph! If I had been AWARE I would indeed have retired earlier. Our ability to ADAPT — our ability to get used to things — is, mostly a great gift. But, sometimes it means that we just don’t pay attention to ourselves. We Fail to Notice — especially we fail to notice situations that change gradually.

Please, God, we don’t have dials to check so please help us get far enough away from our daily lives to “see” our “reflection” — see and act. Thank YOU!

Tagged with: a moment with God, reflections, slow decompressing in retirement
Posted in a series of molts and upgrades, living within limits, rest, seeing, setting my life in context

Understanding Mom’s Cat — Hearing What Is Not Said

Posted on September 13, 2011 by a moment with god — Leave a comment

Queen Katrina, my mother's cat

Good Morning, God!

I have finally discovered that Queen Katrina, Mom’s Cat, loves to be scratched sort of roughly. I grew up with cats that loved to be petted gently — not handled “roughly,” so it took me a while to figure it out.

My first clue was when a person visiting my mom used her feet to pet Katrina. FEET? I was amazed. But, after that I tried it myself and the cat definitely liked it.

So I have taken to really scruffing her fur up and she keeps coming back for more.

This is a great relief to me because for so long I had no idea what it was that Queen Katrina wanted when she would come and sit and LOOK at me. Now I have know at least one thing she wants.

Still, I have the feeling that The Queen has “other issues,” and I do wish that I could understand her better.

Understanding — standing with — creatures and people is so important! And, I tell You, God, some people are as hard to “hear” as my Mom’s cat. Still, I am hoping that “trying” counts. And I’d love Your Help!

Tagged with: cats, communication, hearing, Hearing what is not said, understanding
Posted in Communication, Hearing, interspecies contact, small mysteries, so much to learn

Moon Rise on 9/11 — Anniversaries and Remembering

Posted on September 12, 2011 by a moment with god — Leave a comment

9/11/11 Full Moon Rising over Koko Crater

Good Morning, God!

Last night the moon was full and we went with friends from out of towm to The Shack on Koko Marina. It has long been one of my favorite views. And, somehow, the almost Black and White quality of this photo seems appropriate for the Tenth Anniversary of 9/11.

America got through the day all right, God. Thank You! I realize now that I was sort of “holding my breath” coming up to that date and then all through the day. I managed to hold the Fear down to a background rumble. But, it was there.

Traumas have a reverberating effect, God. And it seems that our very cells remember the Date. Some Inner Part of us keeps track of the days and the years — keeps track of Anniversaries. I don’t think I have read about this, God. I have just slowly observed it in my own life — over time.

Actually, I just stopped and DID read a little about Chronobiology and found a whole book about it called Chronobiology: Biological Timekeeping. I did note that these scientists tend to think of biorhythms as a pseudo science. It is all very interesting, God.

And the thought comes to me — reluctantly — that perhaps “civilizations and cultures” have a Time Cycle, too. MANY TIME CYCLES! But, back to small things, God! I have been sitting here watching, out of the corner of my eye, a video of “the light-emiting firefly enzyme luciferase.” It is amazing to see them all pulse together.

It makes me think of how women who are housed together for any period of time do synchronize their biological periods. Now I am wondering about Nations. Sometimes, God, I feel altogether TOO curious . . . . I am off to go walking.

Tagged with: anniversaries, cellular memory, Full Moon and 9/11, grief, remembering, traumas
Posted in time, Transitions

A Window into Our Valley and Our Thoughts

Posted on September 11, 2011 by a moment with god — Leave a comment

Looking out the window of 24 Hour Fitness and up our valley

Good Morning, God!

I do love seeing familiar things from new perspectives. Amazingly, I was at 24 Hour Fitness the other day — yes, exercising — when I looked out the window and saw Our Valley.

The angles were such that I got lots of reflections and just half the valley. But, no matter, I think it looks “arty.” I’ve been into Art recently, God. Enjoying the simple creativity of design. I’ve done four “displays” in the last few weeks. Hmmm. It isn’t really that simple as Too Many Words get in the way of the message. The images should speak — with words as supporting pontoons.

What is it that Jesus said? “Do not babble on like the pagans who think they will be heard by their many words.” Well, it isn’t just “pagans” who go on for too long. I remember getting a three page letter from the President of a major university. I was astounded that no one had explained to him that One Page is the limit.

And speaking of communication, God, years ago I realized that People “HEAR” what we THINK. That may not be strictly true — but it is true enough. I think our unconscious does it by taking in micro-fast facial expressions, body language and tone of voice. Anyway, realizing that people “know” what I am thinking is a major motivator in cleaning up my thoughts.

We don’t need a lot of words. And You don’t need a lot of words, God. I was going to say that our words to You should be truthful (about ourselves) and trusting concerning Your Nature. But then, You look into our Hearts, and You don’t need any words at all.

Tagged with: different perspectives, Hearing what is not said, reflections and reflecting, the limitations of words
Posted in Communication, Hearing, living within limits, seeing

Work Hardened — in Metal and Men

Posted on September 10, 2011 by a moment with god — Leave a comment

Kit under a tree at Sandy Beach

Good Morning, God!

You caught me by surprise, yesterday. I had no idea I You were going to point out my “Gollum” potential. Sigh.

But now, God, back to “my” topic about the jewelry class. The instructor explained that when we hammer or bend metal it becomes “Work Hardened.” The molecules form crystals and become rigid — very hard to bend.

As soon as I heard the phrase, “Work Hardened” I thought, Oh, yes! So many of us have become “work hardened.” Hard to bend and not so flexible. But, metal doesn’t have to stay in that rigid crystalline structure. It can be annealed! “Annealing [heating] is used to induce ductility, soften material, relieve internal stresses . . .”

In the Jewelry class we used blow torches to heat the copper wire and return it to a softer more flexible state. In class, I started to twist my wire and it didn’t budge. I had forgotten the annealing step! A minute under the blow torch and the wire twisted easily!

Now, what about US, God? Blow torches won’t work! How are we to be delivered from our crystalline structure? I’ve been pondering this. My first thought was that anything that heats us up — causes sweating — might help relieve internal stress. Running, brisk walking, even saunas?

On another level, there is also the Warmth of the Heart, God. Love has the power to “anneal” us — soften us, relax inner rigidities. For me, those 10 day silent retreats in Snowmass really helped to “soften” me. My Wednesday Prayer Group also helps me experience Your Love. YOUR LOVE is the best “annealing” agent of all. Please, God, help us open to Your Healing Love!

Tagged with: crystalline structures and rigidity, God's healing Love, the annealing of the Heart, work-hardened
Posted in accepting my need for help, Hearts, LOVE, Work

A Hand-Made Ring and the Unexpected Gollum in me

Posted on September 9, 2011 by a moment with god — Leave a comment

A copper ring -- made in my first day in jewelry class

Good Morning, God!

I loved my first jewelry class, God! LOVED IT! The instructor is super and this ring is his design. We all made one. Well, actually, I made two. That’s because I messed up following directions and I hammered both ends of my first copper wire.

It was important to start over as each step introduced us to a skill. At the end of the class, I had 15 minutes left over. So I took the wire with the “mistake” and quickly made a second ring.

The first ring was lovingly polished. I thought it was perfect. I really did! Alas,God, Gollum, from The Lord of the Rings has sprung to mind. I am afraid, God, I would not qualify as Frodo, the Ring Bearer.

This was not The Ring of Power. This was just made from a copper wire! But it had power over me. The power of the Created over the Creator. Hmmm. You are the Creator. We are the Created. Perhaps that might help explain Your Love for us?

Well, God, I guess the good news is that the “enchantment” didn’t last. I took this photo of My Ring and in looking at the photo I noticed on the bottom right spiral of the ring a ROUGH SPOT! My hand went to my perfect ring — ARUGH! The rough spot was really there. I could feel it!

A plain old nail file and nail buffer got out the rough spot and brought it back to almost perfect. But, now that I have recovered, I realize that I prefer the irregularities — the hammer marks — on the ring that I made in such a hurry I didn’t have time to polish it perfectly. I hope, God, that You feel that way about our irregularities.

Tagged with: Gollum, hammer marks, irregularities, my precious ring, polished, the creator and the created
Posted in Creating, LOVE

Looking Closely: Spider Lilies, Holograms and Me

Posted on September 8, 2011 by a moment with god — Leave a comment

Spider Lilies up CLOSE

Good Morning, God!

In scanning through my recent photos, including some glorious scenes at Sandy Beach, I found this lovely close-up of a humble spider lily.

Compelling, I thought. But, Why?

Maybe my husband Kit is right and it is the color that draws me? Note the purple stamen and yellow pollen laden tip.

Or perhaps, God, it is simply that I am really looking at the lily. The world seems to me a sort of hologram. If we look closely at any one thing, the Wonder of the Whole opens up before us. This must be what William Blake meant when he wrote:

To see a world in a grain of sand /And a heaven in a wild flower, Hold infinity in the palm of your hand /And eternity in an hour.

I just read the rest of that poem: Auguries of Innocence by William Blake. It has been years since I read it and I was surprised by the line that follows: A robin redbreast in a cage / Puts all heaven in a rage.

Hmmm. This is not a poem to be taken lightly, is it God. If Heaven rages at a Robin being confined in a Cage, what is Heaven’s response toward genocide? I’m thinking back to Bosnia — and more recently Darfur.

You have written in our hearts — designed in us — compassion for all creatures. We disregard it at our peril. As Blake goes on to say: He who doubts from what he sees / Will ne’er believe, do what you please.

Tagged with: holograms, looking closely, seeing, spider lilies, To see a world in a grain of sand
Posted in a matter of scale, inner paths of the heart, Light shining through, seeing, web of life

Making The Turn — Opening to Hope

Posted on September 7, 2011 by a moment with god — Leave a comment

an old VW bug beautifully restored

Good Morning,God!

Sometimes we see something that instantly crystalizes a half-formed thought. That’s what happened coming home from an early Labor Day picnic with friends at Sandy Beach.

We drove by this old VW bug that had been beautifully restored. And I thought, “THAT is what I want to do with My Body. Restore it!”

Renovating a car is easy: a new engine, a new paint job, lots of re-chroming, and new seats and flooring — VOILA! Hmmm. OK, it isn’t THAT easy. But will still take more to “renovate” me.

What I want is: (1) to Keep on Running and (2) return to Right Eating. The last few days I felt as if my “Aircraft Carrier Body” had started to drift while making The Turn. But, today I am feeling stronger, a bit more focused. And best of all — hopeful!

Hopeful, as in certain that the effort — regardless of “results” — is worthwhile. Hope does not disappoint for it depends not on “results” but rather is part of Your Ongoing Inner Artesian Spring. I love that thought, God. It came from the first two chapters of Mystical Hope: Trusting in the Mercy of God by Cynthia Bourgeault.

Hmm. I can see that I need to add Right Thinking and Right Reading to my renovation project!

But, back to the Chrome Trim. I just remembered that last week I bought (at Ross’s) a sparkly silver purse and sparkly silver sandals. Yes! So, a wee bit of shiny chrome is allowed — maybe encouraged? Thank YOU!

Tagged with: Cynthia Bourgeault, hope, Hope that does not disappoint, Mystical Hope, old VW bugs, renovation, right reading
Posted in becoming the change I wish to see, Being ENJOYED by God, Holy Spirit, hope, Hope as a gift from God

We can’t waste Grandmas

Posted on September 6, 2011 by a moment with god — Leave a comment

Rushing to give Grandma a HUG

Good Morning, God!

I love this photo of a dear friend being hugged by her granddaughters — and great-granddaughters! Hugging is so good for our health! In fact, just looking at this photo makes me feel good!

One of my all time favorite quotes is from when Sandy was quite young — five? We were having a family dinner with my parents and my mom had a granddaughter on one side of her but an empty chair on the other side. Sandy left her chair to go sit in the empty one by her grandma, saying, “We can’t waste grandmas!”

Grandmothers ARE a very key resource. Long, long ago a family that had a grandmother had a much better chance of having children grow to adulthood. In many parts of the world that is still the case. Another pair of helping hands, another pair of listening ears — that makes a big difference, doesn’t it God.

Actually, I don’t know that any of us ever really outgrows the need for helping hands and listening hearts. And we don’t need to be part of a biological family to benefit from this kind of giving and receiving.

Tagged with: a moment with God, an extra pair of ears, an extra pair of hands, We can't waste Grandmas
Posted in Being a Blessing, family visits, hugs, LOVE, Uncategorized

A Grey Goose and Reflections on Change

Posted on September 5, 2011 by a moment with god — 1 Comment

a grey goose living in the pond by the Rec Center

Good Morning, God!

I first saw this goose a week or so ago and was delighted. I suppose because it reminded me of a song my Welsh grandma sang — “Go tell Aunt Rhody her old grey goose is dead.” I guess that the news of the goose’s death was good news as the song continues with “the one that she was saving to make a feather bed.”

Today we sleep on Memory Foam, God. I don’t know if I have ever even seen a feather bed. And can one get enough feathers from one goose for a whole feather bed — even a twin bed?

Such former practicalities elude me, God. And since only about 3% of our US population lives on farms, I dare say I am not alone in my ignorance. There are a lot of things our culture has forgotten. Historical figures go appallingly quickly. Hitler? College students ask with a puzzled look.

But then I know just how puzzled I would look if they quizzed me on current singers — or who is on American Idol. And I dare say I am even more indifferent to my lack of such knowledge! Ah, yes, God. Generation gaps. Giant gulfs that divide us — as in computer literacy. And, even then, God, there are degrees. Degrees which expand and extend themselves relentlessly — leaving everyone further behind than they were the day before.

So, God, having moved from a grey goose to my iPhone — I sit pondering the accelerating pace of change. Technological changes, and Cultural Changes. But, inside us? I think very little has changed in how our Hearts work. Love, kindness, respect, attention and purpose are still basic needs. Please help us, God, to learn more about how to care for our Hearts — ours and Others.

Tagged with: a moment with God, refections on change
Posted in Changing, Hearts, LOVE, Transitions