pausing to pray

IMG_2869Good Day, God!

This morning I read — from a handout our pastor gave us — this poem by Mary Oliver.
It makes PRAYER so simple. And I feel that is exactly how You want it to be. SIMPLE! So we don’t need to be special or ordained or qualified. We just need to pause and pray.

PRAYING BY Mary Oliver

It doesn’t have to be
the blue iris, it could be
weeds in a vacant lot, or a few
small stores: just pay attention, then patch

a few words together and don’t try
to make them elaborate, this isn’t
a contest but the doorway

into thanks, and a silence in which
another voice may speak.


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Posted in Awe, connecting, gratitude, Prayer, praying, taking time to focus

Embracing Enchantment

blue flowers

Good Morning, God!

The other day, as I was doing Centering Prayer, I invited whoever wished to come up out of my Inner Dungeon to appear. Immediately there stood before me — in my Mind’s Eye — a woman who introduced herself as The Magician.

Magician? I was totally surprised! I had been firmly taught to avoid magic and witches etc. But, there she was. I was assured it wasn’t about Black Magic or White Magic — but rather High Magic. Magic as in the books of C.S. Lewis.

That was reassuring! Still, a Magician? In me? Part of me? Hmm.

So, I’ve been pondering. So far I have two insights. In today’s world magicians influence WHAT the audience focuses on. By being enticed to SEE one thing we MISS another. I thought, OH! Perhaps my magician is to help me SEE what You might want me to see. . . to help me focus . . . to help me stop missing things. I LIKE THAT!

The second insight is more societal. For several centuries we’ve been in the Age of Enlightenment where REASON RULES and values Control and Predictability. Very little room was made for You and the inexplicable . . the miraculous. But, now Science is moving into Quantum Physics. And that increased understanding is inviting us back into Mystery . . . and Wonder . . .and Awe.

We are not designed to live by Reason alone. We need ENCHANTMENT. We need to dwell in the ever so REAL Cosmos where surprises are everywhere. Where synchronicity happens. And a pause to admire flowers can connect us to You.


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Posted in Awe, beauty, connecting, delight, Enchantment, Faith, Greening Spirit, mysteries

The Delight of Surprises

IMG_2417Good Evening, God!

What a marvelous world we live in. My wonderful husband Kit and I went with dear friends to watch the Super Moon rise. Only we went on the 30th . . . one day before full. Full moons are lovely. But, the moon one day before full was still 99% full and it rose 64 minutes earlier!  That matters to those of us who rise early and go to bed early.

One good thing about full moons is that they are predictable. I could actually look up the times and percentages. But I couldn’t help but think that our world is suffused with beautiful moments — like this photo I took while waiting for the Moon Rise Main Event.

It was an unexpected delight! I just hadn’t seen the clouds. Not until I took a photo.sunsetJust clouds. But they filled me with Joy. And Your World, God, is FILLED with small fleeting delights. I think there is a Japanese saying that Things that are Fleeting are More Beautiful?

My question is — How can I cultivate the quality of  Being Aware?


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Posted in awareness, beauty, clapping our hands in joy, connecting, JOY, the joy of sharing, web of life

Stuck in What We Know

71E9PjUQCzL._SL1500_Good Evening, God!

It was LOVE/LUST at first sight with the iPhone. I wanted it. In fact, I wanted my Life to be just like the face of the iPhone — full of things clearly named and easily accessible. At the time I was using a Pearl Blackberry. But, I left that behind with never a backward glance.

The other day, while shopping in Costco, I fell into conversation with the spouse of a visiting classmate of Kit’s. A nice guy – clearly intelligent! We exchanged phone numbers and  he commented on the nice interface of my iPhone. You don’t have an iPhone? I asked.  No no, I have a clamshell he responded.

At dinner that night I mentioned to Kit my surprise that such a smart guy didn’t have an iPhone. We discussed possible reasons. No pushy children? No helpful grandchildren? I confess, God, that I was considering  sending him a text on how to get to the nearest Apple store when Reality Broke Through!

This guy was Just Like Me!  What he had WORKED. And there were lots and lots of things waiting for him to learn and discover. My beloved iPhone just wasn’t on his list. Hmm.

Once this Broader View took hold — I thought of things I wanted to learn to do, but hadn’t. Ah yes, learning takes focus . . . and focus takes energy . . . and then there is the little matter of commitment.  All of those things are helped by Desire. Wanting something is the first step toward getting it.

Well, yes, God. Maybe THAT is the real problem. I am quite happy with my life as it is.  I’d have to say that I’m good with Gratitude. . . and now I’m realizing that being grateful definitely reduces my desire to learn, grow and change.


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Posted in connecting, Energy, gratitude, growing toward up, learning, taking time to focus

Growth as Molting

Good Evening, God!

Mostly I think of growth as a slow progression from bud to fruit . . . green to ripe. Simple. Ah! But now I am finally realizing the GROWTH for Humans is much more complex. In fact, this morning it came to me that I am in need of a MOLT.  And even odder yet,  it is an internal relational molt — yes, within me.

I realized that I was constrained by old cultural norms. DUH!  Aren’t we ALL constrained by old out dated outworn norms.  Norms that have always been with us. Norms we don’t challenge. We don’t challenge and change if we don’t SEE them.  So, that realization is (I HOPE) the last lesson from this Instructive Illness I’m in. 

But, then another idea followed! If I as an individual need periodic Molts — how much more our society as a whole needs frequent Molts! Old ideas that are no longer helpful! Daniel Quinn’s book Beyond Civilization is FULL of molts!

The one that hit me was about how there are jobs that we do — like repaving roads and filling pot holes — that are never done. Never FINISHED. Quinn suggests that we consider HOMELESSNESS like that. We continue working to help those we can. But, then instead of “criminalizing” those we can’t help — we see HOW we can help them — as in listen to them. He starts this riff in chapter 110 and had some really good ideas. (I’m in chapter 114.)

Does acceding mean we approve of folks being homeless? Not at all. But, it does mean having a lot more variety and creativity in how we work with our fellow human beings.  Hmm. I think I am going to send this to my state senator! It’s Time for a societal molt on homelessness!

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Posted in a series of molts and upgrades, accepting my ability to REDESIGN, adjusting, Books, Changing, choices, connecting, Options

Using My Mistakes/Wounding to rebuild

IMG_2157Good Night God,

Believing as deeply as I do that You love us . . . I am coming to believe that my Painful, Long Hidden — Wrong Responses — can be used to help me rebuild. The idea seems to be that when one of these Dark Spots surfaces I can go back into it. Be with my Wounded/Wounding Self.  Feel with it.  And then ask — if you could do this over again – what would you do?

Sometimes a response comes quickly . . . sometimes I sit grieving with my Earlier Self and wondering what could I have done. But, the very act of Being With . . . is rebuilding more than I know.

Once I feel clear on what I wish I had done . . . I make it my Intention. Somehow that helps.  I have rebuilt or maybe re-welcomed a Locked up Part of me. It is a beginning. And that beginning ripples out — wider and deeper than I know.

Here is a poem after Centering:

Intentions are outside of Time

I didn’t know that
Maybe I still don’t
How can that be?

Because Intentions reside in a
 Safer Place

Oh😊 I like that!

We are always connected
And we can go back
Via  Courage and Compassion
To Dark Spots and gently ask
Our younger Frozen self
Now that I am with you
Let us imagine
What we MIGHT have done?

It may come in a flash
Of knowing

Or perhaps we need to stay there with
The Wounded/Wounding One
Stay until SHE CAN imagine a better response

And then choose that as her INTENTION
BUT, does that change anything?

And its Power Ripples
Throughout the DEPTH

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Posted in Choosing to respond, Compassion, connecting, courage, God's Time, Intentions, recovery time, self care as self compassion and humility, self-compassion, time

All Is Well With My Soul

Art Museum on MLK dayGood Evening, God!

I’m toward the end of my Second Instructional Illness — I hope. It was several months ago when I “heard” You say, “You can stay home on Tuesdays and Fridays or you can have a series of instructional illnesses.” That got my attention! And I did manage to stop a longstanding meeting on my Fridays. And, mostly, I don’t have anything that I do on those days — regularly. I do however, add in an occasional This or That. Yes, it is true I add them with some frequency. So, is that part of the reason for my protracted ear infection?

Yes, but, here is a Key Point: I was on the Mainland for 33 days this Fall tending to family business. Actually, I was working on Remedial Mothering. How could I not go? Yes, I guess “trusting my daughter to You” was a passive sort of option. But it was so CLEAR that I was TO GO! As always, it turned out that I was not going just to “help” her but for myself to BE HELPED! I had holes in my soul that needed mending. My visit took me on a difficult inward journey toward integration and wholeness.

However, it did massively drain my Inner Battery. 

The word Growing fails utterly to capture the wrenching seismic upheavals I went through. I came home thankful but so very depleted. I thought I was smart taking One Whole Week off to “recover” when I returned home. One Week? How woefully inadequate!

I needed MORE time off and this illness has forced me to cancel . . . more and more.  And letting go of Doing Things I Love . . . has been a Lovely Lesson. I’m grateful! And I’m learning that these lessons are mostly so I will love myself more.  They are not so You will love me more! You already love infinitely.

Just now as I was climbing the stairs after dinner I was flooded with a Profound Sense of Wellness — sick or not.  I am WELL. Truly, All is WELL with my SOUL!

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Posted in Abundant Life, accepting my ability to REDESIGN, accepting my authority to set limits, accepting my need for help, connecting, gratitude, health, Lessons, LOVE, The Flow of God's Love, Wellness

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