Dining in Little Tehran with my Daugher

Posted on October 16, 2010 by a moment with god — 2 Comments

dining at the Flame Restaurant -- next to the old style oven

Good Morning, God!

It was Goodbye Tucson and Hello Little Tehran — or Tehrangeles as the hub of the half million Iranians in Los Angeles is called. Suz and I picked the Flame Restaurant and asked for the table set next to the old style oven and over-ordered dinner — with lunch the next day in mind.

Such a layering of Cultures and Times, God. I think I was sitting next to an engraving on a glass pane of a Persian King and cuneiform writing. The oven looked like it might well have been used to cook for that king. But, in this photo are images of TVs and also reflections of the TVs placed in every corner of the restaurant– AND in the women’s bathroom — of all things.

The complex and vibrant layering in this photo feels like an image of my travels. First, Suz, then Sandy and the Boys, then the Boys, then Sandy, Dave and the Boys and now Suz again. I have a mind and heart full of images and vignettes.

But, back to the restaurant and the food — it was just what I wanted — fresh herbs and chicken in a walnut and pomegranate sauce. Pomegranates, again, God, reminding me that I still haven’t finished the book, Traveling with Pomegranates. It is a book in which Sue Monk Kidd layers mother daughter relationships along side her relationships with You, God. And, perhaps, that deep primal relationship takes us as close as we can come to understanding / experiencing Your Love for us.

Tomorrow morning, EARLY, Kit arrives and my Mother/Daughter travels will morph into Travels with Kit. Another facet of LOVE to experience, appreciate and treasure.

Posted in appreciation, daughters, LOVE, people as gifts, relationships, thankfulness, the joy of sharing, the layers of life

Bittersweet Sunsets and Goodbyes

Posted on October 15, 2010 by a moment with god — Leave a comment

A Tucson Sunset - while riding down Broadway

Good Morning, God!

What an altogether marvelous time I had in Tucson! While there I read Jon Katz latest book — about a border collie on a sheep farm — and it is such a perfect analogy for my stay. Not, God, that I was the sheep dog, no way.

I was the sheep! Mark was the sheep dog . . . a Border Collie for sure. This dawned on me as Sandy, Mark and I were driving to the airport after a breakfast at the Good Egg. [Ian WAS planning on going with us — but he couldn’t wait quite that long to eat — so opted to stay home.]

Mark has this way of verbally nipping — designed to round me up and move me in the Right Direction. At one point, Sandy said “I NEVER would have talked to my grandparents that way!” And, of course, neither would I. But, I felt, God, that Mark saw me as a real person — and while I obviously needed improving — I felt very loved.

Of course, God, I nipped back and for the most part we enjoyed the bickering. Roles are all very well. But how much better to be seen as a real person. I felt that was also the case with Sandy. I don’t mean to imply that the “role” disappeared — rather it was subsumed into a wider deeper appreciation of each other as we are. Thanks, God! Thank You for helping us all to see and love each other as we are!

And now, God, I am smiling ruefully. Because I dimly sense that I did better this time around. Hmmm. I had no goals — nothing I wanted to “help” anyone with — it seemed more than enough —this loving people and myself as we are.

Posted in Expand my Heart, family visits, LOVE, respect

Saint Anne, the Patron Saint of Grandmothers

Posted on October 14, 2010 by a moment with god — Leave a comment

St. Anne, holding Mary in her lap

Good Morning, God!

Sandy has taken Ian to school and is now biking. I am back into my book – Traveling with Pomegranates — and have just come upon the idea of St. Anne — the mother of Mary — as the patron saint of grandmothers! And better yet, I just found this image of her with Mary in her LAP! Zounds! Isn’t that EXACTLY what I want! To place my beloved daughter on MY LAP — knowing that she will forever be holding HER child.

How completely “sanitized” the Old Catholic Church was by the Protestant Men. How striped of WOMEN and IMAGES and COMPASSION. (Isn’t that a little harsh, Margie? some voice asks). Maybe. But surely, the full reality of Women — except as Virgins, Maternal Virgins — was removed. Sad? Yes, but far more than simply sad. Evil, is the word for what has been done to women.

And, now, God, I am thinking back to the word Self — how it was split into Selfless or Selfish — two minor, if essential, parts of a much bigger whole. That seems the clearest analogy for what was done to WOMAN — Virgin or Wanton — Wife or Mistress — Object of Desire or Invisible.

Is this a RANT? Perhaps. I am sitting here — thinking of how some types of mushrooms are just visible expressions of a vast underground network of the “real” mushroom. I am seeing each of us, each woman, as not just an individual, but as an expression of an unseen — and vast — WHOLE.

But, God, let me back off from Gender Universes — and return to my small corner of the Cosmos — I love the idea and image of St. Anne. And I am smiling as Anne is my middle name. Aaah, God. Prod us — prod us women — into awareness. More than that, even, Please prod us ALL — men and women — into becoming AWAKE.

Tagged with: A patron saint for grandmothers
Posted in gender universes, Roots, setting my life in context, the gift of persistent love, the importance of Grandmothers

An Asteroid Flyby – And Things that go Bump in the Night

Posted on October 13, 2010 by a moment with god — Leave a comment

An asteroid flyby Oct. 12

Good Morning, God!

O.K., so it was a SMALL asteroid that just missed us yesterday. Still, God, I don’t care much for the “idea” of asteroids coming between us and our moon. And when I looked at this chart it seemed a lot closer to us than to the moon, just 28,000 miles away.

Now, the article about it did say that it was only 5-10 meters in diameter and would have burned up in our atmosphere. But, with 30,000,000 undiscovered asteroids out there! I must say, I am glad that Cal Tech’s JPL is running The Near-Earth Object Observations Program, commonly called “Spaceguard.”

The thing is, God, that article reminds me our our vulnerability. Our planet HAS been hit by asteroids — BIG ones — and it WILL be hit again. I suppose knowing that is sort of like knowing that the super volcano underneath Yellowstone is due. We know it the way we know planes crash — or more to the statistical point — cars crash. Yet, we get up and drive hither and yon without much perceptible worry.

But, back to the asteroids. What WOULD we do, God, if we saw a BIG ONE coming toward us? What would we do if we could predict major earthquakes? Or, if we knew the date of our own death? YUCK.

And, if knowing is hard, God, what about deciding? Doctors used to be taught to tell their patients as little as possible. The doctors made the decisions. Now the right and responsibility to decide is placed on the patient. But many choices are between things that are basically unbearable. Parents forced to make decisions like that for their children may suffer for years.

Hmmm. How is it I have gone from Knowing to Deciding to Suffering? And, now I “hear” my earthly father saying “Life isn’t supposed to be easy” and I am Thankful, God, that my life hasn’t been harder!

Posted in choices, decision making, fears, thankfulness

Being HEARD into Speaking

Posted on October 12, 2010 by a moment with god — Leave a comment

Traveling with Pomegranates

Good Morning, God!

This is Part 4 of my multifaceted Trip! This is the Part where I am not just Tutu but Mother and Mother-in-law — the Belle Mama. And, as is always the case with more “roles” the interactions become more complex. Now, God, I don’t like the word ROLE as it makes it sound scripted and artificial.

Actually, the RELATIONSHIP of Mother / Daughter is incredibly rich and deep and I suspect my conscious mind is 98% unaware of what is going on at any point in time. Yes, God, it is just as well (read: darned good thing) that Kit is not here too. My Husband / Wife relationship would multiply the complexity.

So, God, it is not too surprising that when I was in the bookstore the other day I was drawn to Sue Monk Kidd’s book — written with her daughter — Traveling with Pomegranates. I bought it on Kindle and am now through the first third. That ends with the Daughter sharing her grief and depression with her Mother. That is SO IMPORTANT, GOD! And yet, it is SO HARD to do.

I remember a dear aunt confiding that the reason she had stayed WAY TOO LONG in an abusive marriage was because her mother had taught her that we DO NOT AIR OUR DIRTY LINEN IN PUBLIC. Finally, she had a daugher-in-law that HEARD HER into speaking. And speaking was the start of the turn that allowed her to stand up for herself. But by that time she was too full of past hurts to be able to start over.

Speaking — hearing the words come out of our mouth — has great power. Silence is the Great Jailor. Help us, all, God, to take our turn at being Your EARS in this world — HEARiNG those around us into SPEAKING.

Tagged with: Silence is the Great Jailor
Posted in connections, daughters, Hearing, listening, LOVE

Front Doors, Inner Doors and Open Doors

Posted on October 11, 2010 by a moment with god — Leave a comment

Sandy and Dave's Front Door

Good Morning, God!

HUZZAH! The beloved Parents have returned! And I am back to adjunct status! No more setting an alarm for 5:30 to make sure all gets done in good order. No more responsibility! But, it has been a precious time of being with my grandsons. Ian was appreciative and almost uniformly pleasant. Mark and I bickered and laughed as he tried to get me up-to-speed via critiques. Aaah, how far short we fall. How different our worlds.

Spending Time together — it was just over a week — opens our inner doors. We can’t really stay in the “Living Room” we reserve for Company that long. And so we become “known” even as we “know.” Our “essential” self peaks — and sometimes ROARS — out.

Now, God, I feel I love them more fully — knowing more seems to lead to loving more. I told Ian the other day that he was “Perfect” and by that I meant “Lacking Nothing Essential.” I know, God, that is not the common definition. But I love it! We humans can be crippled and twisted and sometimes demonic — but we have an essential core that lacks nothing — that can be healed and redeemed.

Somehow, seeing that ESSENTIAL CORE makes it possible to Respect one another as Humans. And RESPECT is one of the best “door openers.” Gosh, God, that reminds me of a fascinating article on how Slobodan Milosevic was brought down by the non-violoent Otpor movement. They made it a point to bring cakes and flowers to the police! One of the leaders, Srdja Popovic, said, “Once you understand that “policemen are just men in a police uniforms” your perception changes and persuasion takes place.”

Aaah, God, You command us to LOVE our enemies. Yet we fear and doubt. But, once again, YOU ARE RIGHT!

Posted in appreciation, being together in a compassionate presence, doors and doorways, LOVE, Perspective, respect, responsibility

A “Perfect” Crescent Moon and A Band Competition

Posted on October 10, 2010 by a moment with god — 1 Comment

Stopped at a Red Light I try to capture the crescent moon

Good Morning, God!

Sandy arrives HOME this afternoon. Ian called her in Australia — in distress — and Mark called having gotten her email saying their flight left in two hours so they could be called before then. Ian’s distress was helped by a plate of spaghetti — I feel my sole contribution has been food.

Then I set out to go off past Oro Valley to watch Mark’s band perform in a Tucson-wide Band Competition. Did they HAVE band competitions, God, when our girls played in marching bands? Ah well, they do now. Here are the categories upon which they are judged: · Auxiliary · Percussion · Visual Performance · General Effect · Music Performance. Mark tells they have professional band judges. Amazing, God, how many subjects have Experts.

I suppose the more one knows — the more nuanced ones appreciation becomes. Still, in Mark’s mind it was summed up by “We didn’t WIN!” Ah, the American Viewpoint. Or perhaps, God, the Human Viewpoint?” However, their “Excellent” was the highest any band received. Mark responded with “Yeah, 20 other bands got that, too!”

And that brings me back to the story about PERFECT! I gave Ian a hug yesterday after his “distress” and told him YOU ARE PERFECT! And, God, as I said this, I realized that is how You see him — as PERFECT! I don’t mean “perfect” as a judge would — or even in the ordinary sense of the word. I mean it more in the sense that last night’s crescent moon was “perfect” — worthy of awe and admiration, in and by itself — not weighed against all other crescent moons of its stage.

A dear friend taught me the Power of the word “Perfect” when she hugged me after I had made a stupid error and whispered. “You’re perfect.” I sensed then the HEALING POWER in that simple word. Thank You, God!

Posted in appreciation, background / foreground questions, breathing in Your Spirit, God wants to nourishes us, Perfect

The beauty of small things

Posted on October 9, 2010 by a moment with god — Leave a comment

The common cactus with fruit

Good Morning, God!

A new day! And it is a Saturday — the boys are still sleeping — and no alarms were set! I just finished the last of my espresso and I am thankful. Sandy emailed from Sydney that she really needed their “vacation.” And it hit me — why am I always the last to know, God? — that I needed this “vacation” too.

Yesterday I finished up some “work” from home. I got to it after a long, relaxed, afternoon nap. And I realized how good it is to be OUT OF my normal push-and-pull days. As they say, A Change of Work is as good as a vacation.

Perhaps, for me, God, the best benefit has been to watch myself set up a new “space” for my stuff AND to set up a new schedule. Yesterday for the fifth straight day I went jogging after taking Ian to school. I was listening to a Timothy Keller sermon on my iPhone — available free at the iTunes store — and taking photos of almost everything in my path.

A Family of small cacti

Everything seemed so beautiful, God! And I was delighted to see that it isn’t just majestic mountains and tall, stately saguaros that are worthy of photos — yes, I already “knew” that — but like many things I “know” it hadn’t been examined and appreciated. Ha! I heard You, God! You are right. I will go back home — like Dorothy — more aware of the truism that there is No Place Like Home.

And,I hope, I will be more aware of the ability You have given to us all to REFRAME my life — to set it in a bigger context — and to look more closely at beauty of small things.

Posted in Abundant Life, accepting my ability to REDESIGN, appreciation, beauty, cacti, Perspective, Possibilities, reframing

Starry Skies, Constants that might not be, and Humility

Posted on October 8, 2010 by a moment with god — Leave a comment

Artists depiction of a distant quasar

Good Morning, God!

I thought this was a beautiful photo . . . but it turned out to be a painting. Still, it is gorgeous! The Heavens DO declare Your Glory! It is sad that we hardly ever get to see the marvels of a starry night anymore. We are urban dwellers and our own manmade lights blind us to the spectacle of Your vast array of stars. I remember being up in the San Bernadino mountains as a young person and standing outside gawking at how there were more stars than darkness. Now it is exciting if I can spot the Milky Way.

a star filled night

Hmmm. I wonder if we will be able to really SEE the stars when we are up at Sequoia. I hope so.

But, I digress, God. I wanted to talk about the Top Physics Story of the Year. Apparently, our Keck telescope and the European Southern Observatory’s Very-Large-Telescope in Peru, were studying 153 quasars and it seems that billions of years ago the structural constant Alpha was different. Now, God, I read this article several times and I still can’t tell if it was bigger or smaller. In fact, I can only quote their definition of Alpha: “a fundamental measure of the strength of the electron’s hold on atoms.”

It isn’t interesting to me because it MEANS anything — it is interesting because the constant seem to have varied. Ah, God, we construct our view of the Universe so diligently. And yet, things like this “happen” and we have to readjust. As in Science, so in Life, God. And once again, I am “nudged” toward Humility. Humility keeps us flexible — or is the right word, fluid? That doesn’t mean jumping from One Certainty to Another — so much as entering a deep compassionate perspective on ourselves and others and our Universe — YOUR UNIVERSE!

Posted in being together in a compassionate presence, Heavens declare the Glory of God, humility, Perspective

Mountain Lions and Me — and, oh yes, FEAR

Posted on October 7, 2010 by a moment with god — Leave a comment

The face of a Mountain Lion

Good Morning, God!

I know that Mountain Lions are Your Creatures, too. But I have to tell You, God, I think that they OUGHT to be AFRAID of humans.

This is not just a theoretical question — a family of four mountain lions was seen last week Friday in MY Sabino Canyon — seen at Mile One and seen in broad daylight! And earlier there were reports here of mountain lions stalking humans. This is not good news.

Now, God, I AM in favor of sharing our world with other creatures! And I realize — upstairs in my “Noble Mind”– that it is OUR Sabino Canyon. But, this is where Reality — Fear, or by another name, Prudence — interjects itself. There is a nice website that tells about the “mountain lion situation at Sabino Canyon” but it doesn’t sound like anyone is doing anything to protect me.

I would like to see “armed guards” with ELECTRIC or TRANQUILIZER GUNS stationed at points where mountain lions were spotted. In fact, I would like posses out there looking for the lions to zap them and create a little — no, honestly, God — a LOT of fear of Humans.

The Political Mind

All of this caused me to do a mountain lion search on the web and I found a site that was a libertarian site. Needless to say, Libertarians are in favor of HUNTING mountain lions.

And that brings me, God, to George Lakoff — who has pointed out — in his book The Political Mind — how EMOTIONS intertwine with THINKING.

I noticed, God, that the face on the book cover is turned away from the mountain lion. So too, do Thinkers fail to face and deal with — or even use — the Power of Emotions.

Please WAKE UP all Thinkers, God!

Posted in fears, interspecies contact, Thinking and Feeling