Good Evening, God
Tell about it
These are Mary Olivers guidelines. And what a marvelous job she did of all three. A few days ago I was surprised to find the injunction to pay attention in the book Gravity and Grace by Simone Weil. Poet and Saint!
I like to think that I pay attention. Kit and I have been going down to the marina to watch the sun rise . . . more often to just to enjoy the light entering the world. And on one occasion to watch a stingray glide by. We are definitely paying attention.
Truly, God, Your world is filled with magical things — waiting for us to pay attention. But, the other day, as I missed our regular turn going to church, it occurred to me that it is all too easy to fall into ruts. That afternoon, while praying, I thought I would vary Our Father, by starting with Our Mother. . .
I was astounded at the power of the impact of that one change of word! I must confess, God, that when I name You as Father, You seem quite content to “stay up in heaven”. Not so, when I changed Your gender! You as Mother were immediately IN ME! In every cell and deeply concerned/ interested in every detail of my life — my very being.
Oh my goodness! Is this just how I perceive the genders? Or did I accidentally open the door to a more “intimate” connection with You? I certainly do not want to go back. It isn’t so much that my cognitive understanding changed. I have “believed” for some time that You were “Willing; Wanting; and WAITING” to be invited in to every nook and corner of my being. But what happened here was a flood of FEELING. It wasn’t that You wanted. It was that You WERE!!!
Feelings are so vivid and compelling.
So, I am sharing.