Good Evening, God!
C. S. Lewis said that two Christians have ten times the power of one Christian. I experience the reality of that truth every time I drive up Tantalus to see my spiritual director, June. As we sit together — consciously aware of Your Presence — I am helped to see myself and hear myself.
Hearing myself is hard, God. But just yesterday I heard a phrase that helped me understand why it’s so hard. Apparently, we have a plethora of systems or modules inside us. Some are distributed on the left or right side of our brains and some are distributed across the brain. PLETHORA! I looked it up and it is a “superabundance, an excess.”
Sigh, sometimes that is exactly what it feels like, God. Too many Modules trying to decide who’s in charge right now. It’s like a log jam with No One In Charge and Nothing Getting Done. Golly, I thought it was hard enough just to juggle all the diverse Roles we women manage. Now I realize the roles are just the surface.
The phrase about my inner plethora is from the book Who’s In Charge?, by Michael Gazzaniga. I’m only on chapter 3, God, but, I have this funny feeling that the author is going to tell me that I (the one talking with You) am the one in charge.
I do know that ever since I “agreed” to a Grand Alliance with my Warrior Spirit that she has been very helpful. Then January 1st I “turned down” the hyper-vigilent Critical Spirit and gave myself permission to Make Mistakes. Because I was allowed to “make mistakes” I was able to navigate the tedious and err prone path of getting my website up.
So, I am learning HOW to work together with my Plethora of Inner Peoples. But, please, God, keep on helping me!