Sitting by Still Waters

Posted on August 9, 2011 by a moment with god — Leave a comment

Earth, Sky and Sea: breakfast at the Marina

Good Morning, God!

I wish I could get Kit to go with me and have breakfast on the Marina. It’s only $2.99 so perhaps I could entice him. (Kit is very generous, God, but he is a practical Scot, so value matters to him.) I sat and pondered that and then I just went and asked him and he said yes! (He did ask, though, “Does that include the coffee?)

Hmmm. I wonder how many things don’t happen because people don’t ask? I wonder how many opportunities go unnoticed . . . because they weren’t asked for.

Perhaps this “failure to ask” is related to “a tendency to blame others?” Too often, God, we fail to take personal responsibility. Sigh. It seems to me, God, that personal responsibility is a lot trickier than I used to think.

I am working at “taking care of myself” by which I mean getting enough sleep, taking my vitamins, exercising, praying, and spending time cleaning up after myself. Yes, I am still leaving a trail of detritus (read trash).

To care for myself in those ways I will have to resist running off to help others — resist helping with worthy things. This is not easy for me, God.

But, I am beginning to see that body fat and paper piles are different forms of the same thing. Both of them result from Misallocated Energy. Hmmm. Maybe that is why You tell us to BLESS, BLESS and DO NOT CURSE. Cursing is definitely a misallocation of energy. So is blaming, fault finding and demonizing others.

Praying for those we disagree with isn’t easy . . . but it is a very wise allocation of energy. Praying for them to be filled with Your Light and Love — brings us out of the Shadows and closer to Your Light and Love. . . . and that is the True Source of our energy. Thank You, God!

Tagged with: blessing and not cursing, fat cells and paper piles, personal responsibility, wise allocation of energy
Posted in asking for help for myself, power and peace and gentleness, Prayer, Praying for our enemies, simple joys of daily life

A Special Thank You at the 2011 Mango Days Fun Run

Posted on August 8, 2011 by a moment with god — Leave a comment

Tina, the Bagpiper at the Mango Days Fun Run

Good Morning, God!

Yesterday was the 9th running of the Mango Days Fun Run — a 5k fund raiser for The Leukemia & Lymphoma Society. Tina has played the bagpipes at all 9 runs and I have always enjoyed her playing and looked forward to hearing her during the races.

But yesterday was the first time I really understood just how helpful the pipes are. As I was puffing toward the finish line but still too far away to see anything, I HEARD the faint sounds of her piping. Oh JOY! I focused on the music — getting closer and closer — it really helped pull me in.

I told Tina just how helpful her piping was and she said she had the same experience when she was running a 10k. We agreed that if you haven’t experienced being exhausted — and then hearing the pipes playing at the finish — you just can’t understand their power to pull.

I am feeling very thankful to Tina, God. And, I am especially thankful for Your Help that made it possible for me to “run” the entire 3.1 miles without walking! It was only last week that I was able to walk two miles.

Actually I just feel all around THANKFUL! Thankful to The Leukemia & Lymphoma Society organizers, all the volunteer workers, Connie, our wonderful MC; Chris the super pre-race MC; all the dear friends who came out and walked or ran — and all the people who came to participate. Running so there will be more survivors.

Posted in appreciation, gratitude, thankfulness

Off to the Mango Day’s Fun Run

Posted on August 7, 2011 by a moment with god — Leave a comment

Photo of a night heron that I took last year -- while jogging the run

Good Morning, God!

In just a few minutes I shall be OFF to go to Patty’s Mango Days Fun Run. It starts at 6:30 but Kit will want me there earlier. I don’t blame him. Last year I forgot to pick up my personal timing chip. That caused a smallish problem.

Yesterday, God, for the first time since mid June I felt like I might actually be able to run. Maybe not the whole way, because I haven’t run since April, when my three Mainland trips began.

In fact, yesterday I bustled around cleaning and working up a sweat. It felt really good. I suspect, God, that the “retirement dinner” being over has something to do with how good I feel. Because I am still mostly oblivious to my feelings, I don’t know quite how it worked, God. But, it did feel that a lot of energy was “released” in me yesterday. What was the energy being used for before that? Was it being used to process my feelings? — or to suppress them? — or to suppress them until they were processed? I lean toward the latter, myself.

Back to the RUN. As You can tell by the photo of the night heron that I took last year while running I will take pictures before, after and during my run. Last year I jogged the whole way — except for taking photos. This year it may well be more photos and less jogging. But, I really want to please Kit — and Patty, too. In fact, mostly I want to please Patty. So, I’d appreciate any help You might want to give me, God. Please, help us all!

Tagged with: The Mango Day's Fun Run, transitions, wanting to make my daughter proud
Posted in daughters, Energy, Feeling our feelings

Transitions — Portals — and a Slower Kind of Useful

Posted on August 6, 2011 by a moment with god — Leave a comment

walking around Kapiolani Park

Good Morning, God!

Aaaah! A wonderful Surprise Retirement dinner last night! A room filled with friends saying good-bye. A marvelous memory to close a long and fruitful second career. Thank You, God!

I chose this photo to evoke the sense of going on through a “portal” — even as the path continues to wind around.

And last night’s dinner was a “portal” of sorts celebrating the five of us retiring from the committee. I had 14 wonderful years of sort of “being in charge” of a lovely library . . . working with the BEST of PEOPLE. And aren’t book lovers the very best of people, God?

What a privilege it has been to work with so many dearly beloved friends and companions on all the voluminous tasks involved in keeping a library humming along. Many of those friends have moved on to be with You, God. I hope You have “useful things” for them to be working on Up There.

For I do believe that “being useful” is one of the chief joys of life. Life here and Life in the Hereafter.

When I was young — and maybe even when I was old, too — I thought being useful meant being busy. But, now I know (when it doesn’t slip my mind) that useful is very often best done slowly. It takes time to hear people into speaking from their hearts. It can’t be hurried or rushed. It takes time to build relationships — walking together — hearing and being heard as we walk along.

Thank You, God, for hearing me — hearing us — for helping with a word or insight, now and then. Thank You for the Path of Life Going On . . . for New Turns and New Directions. For the Future AND the Past, Thank YOU!

Tagged with: gratitude, the importance of slow, the joy of being useful, transitions
Posted in gratitude, thankfulness

Good People and Children Who Need Hugs, and MORE

Posted on August 5, 2011 by a moment with god — Leave a comment

61 Hug me dolls going to the Children's Justice Center

Good Morning, God!

Imagine my surprise passing by a normally empty couch at Arcadia and seeing 61 Hug Me dolls. I stopped and asked the lovely woman standing by them, WHAT WERE THEY? She said they were going to the Children’s Justice Center of Oahu — which is part of the Family Court. She had made the patterns and then enlisted other Arcadians to join her in stitching up the dolls. A labor of love — a loving labor.

Apparently, the police keep them to give to scared and traumatized little children who may be at the scene of a crime or involved in a case of suspected abuse. Child Protective Services may also give them to a child who is being “interviewed.”

Even now, God, I can feel my blood run cold as I think of what some children go through. I can’t help but feel that abuse of children is at the root of many, many problems in our society.

I remember a friend who taught prisoners about child development and parenting — actually, I think it included relationships and other essential information. She said that the men all asked if there could be a class for their girl friends and wives. After they learned the concepts, they wanted to share. Their partners, without the class, didn’t have the conceptual building blocks to understand.

There are a lot of good people in this world, God. I am sure many more people are doing good things than doing bad things. But, it seems to me that the “playing field” doesn’t even begin to be “level.” I am not offering solutions, God. I am just bringing this to Your Attention.

Posted in a new view of Commons, healing, Hearts, LOVE, Our Extended Family - all creatures great and small

Looking Back Three Months and Feeling Thankful

Posted on August 4, 2011 by a moment with god — Leave a comment

A Panoramic Photo of the Centering Prayer Room at St. Benedict's Retreat Center

Good Morning, God!

I’ve been trying to tell folks how it is that I feel so much LIGHTER since I have (mostly) retired. In truth, God, I am not yet THAT blessed with “free time” as there are a few more training sessions to do. But, I still feel much lighter. In fact, I am surprised at what a difference just Shedding Responsibility makes! Before, I felt the weight of all the things that needed to be done — if not by me — then at least with me.

As I observed years ago, God, it isn’t the work we do that makes us tired. It is the work we don’t do that sits on top of us — pressing down and exhausting us.

So, WHY did it take SO LONG for me to realize I was “Too Busy?” It wasn’t that family and friends didn’t point that reality out to me. They did. And blessings on them, God. But, there were so many pluses to working — good friends, duty, loyalty, habit . . . and yes, I confess, an “enhanced sense of identity.” And those pluses kept me clinging and holding on. Hmmm. Now that I look back, I can see that there were innumerable emotional tentacles holding me fast.

For me to make this SHIFT it took a Ten Day Silent Retreat at St. Benedict’s Retreat Center. Sitting in Silence before You 3 times a day — refraining from talking for much of the day — disconnection from the internet — all this helped to loosen my addition to busy. The “enforced” relaxation helped me OPEN my Hands and Heart . . .opening to You and Your Small Quiet Voice of Wisdom. Thank You, God! THANK YOU!

Now, God, please help me Value Slow!

Tagged with: addiction to busy
Posted in an invitation to abundant life, busy, Changing, Choosing to respond, Work

Sharing: Walking Together and Working Together

Posted on August 3, 2011 by a moment with god — Leave a comment

our part of the marina -- seen at high tide

Good Morning, God!

After dinner, Kit has been walking with me around our block. I tell him it is to help with my “weight loss” and it is. But, I can’t help remembering the study that showed that a daily walk with your spouse or a friend will do more to make you happy than a big increase in your income.

I’m smiling, God! Given our ability to OVERSPEND, the benefit from an increase in income would soon disappear. Still, I take the point. We are social beings. We need each other.

I am convinced that women — especially — are designed to work together.

Yesterday the library committee met and worked in informal “teams” to process books. One team matched call numbers and put them on. Another put on barcodes and wrote the number on the control card. And another team checked for property stamps and added the plastic jackets. Each person had only a small part, but they all shared in the common goal of getting books into the library for the community to read.

They were doing Meaningful work, God. Then last night as I was reading a few pages of the Upside of Irrationality I stumbled on a section on how important it is for workers to derive satisfaction from their work. Part of that satisfaction comes from understanding the purpose and meaning of what they do. Another part is about having a sense of “contributing” to the work. The author, Dan Ariely, talks about the IKEA effect — the satisfaction of building something ourselves.

One more thought, God. When we walk together or work together — we are often talking together. We are sharing a common experience. But even more importantly, we are sharing ourselves. We need more of that sharing, God!

Tagged with: designed to work together, meaningful work, sharing ourselves, The Upside of Irrationality
Posted in Communication, connecting, connections, interactions, meaningful work, Sharing

Embarking on a Path toward a Better, Happier, Body

Posted on August 2, 2011 by a moment with god — 1 Comment

Consider the lilies of the field (or pond) Photo: David Nurse

Good Morning, God!

Several days ago Kit found an OLD photo of me at the beach — me looking svelte. Oddly enough, God, I did not immediately turn my face away. That was my former response because I thought those days — and that body — were gone forever and that made me sad.

Now I am pretty sure I can get part way back — if not to svelte, then surely to “fit.” This is a major shift in my mindset! Thank You, God! Partly, it is because I did shape up under the No Grain Diet. Only to fall — in slow motion — back into a more normal diet. So, I have experienced the joy of a happier healthier body.

Now, it would be TRUE HUMILITY if I took a photo of myself today — in a bathing suit. Not going to happen, God! But, it did occur to me that sharing how I am doing, or not doing, might help me. A small step toward confession, openness, and transparency? Hmmm. Actually, I think “Going Public” means I would be opening myself up to being ACCOUNTABLE! Yuck!

Meanwhile, Sandy, who is visiting an ever Svelte Suz, is beseeching me to GO BACK on the NO GRAIN DIET! She wants an “Improved Role Model!” Me too! So, to help with that, I have sent away for Gut and Psychology Syndrome: Natural Treatment for Autism, Dyspraxia, A.D.D., Dyslexia, A.D.H.D., Depression, Schizophrenia. That’s a book that focuses on first developing healthy gut flora.

Next, I shall make a calendar and track my weight weekly — and report back here monthly. Please, God, help me focus on Health and Wellness. And yes, God, re-retiring is KEY to having the energy to invest in these changes. Thank YOU!

Tagged with: starting a GAP diet, the No Grain diet
Posted in accepting my ability to REDESIGN, accepting my authority to set limits, Cherishing our Bodies, choices

A Variety of Perspectives — Skies and Stars and Galaxies

Posted on August 1, 2011 by a moment with god — Leave a comment

Looking toward the center of our galaxy -- the Milky Way

Good Morning, God!

It is a much smaller world than it was when I was young, God. I just finished reading an email from a friend in Africa and another from a friend in Brazil. And Sanz has been sending photos via iPhone of her visit with Suz. Wonderful!

Another friend just send a link to the Canada -France – Hawaii Telescope site where they have time lapse movies of the view looking East from Mauna Kea. You can choose to watch a night with a full moon or a new moon.

Hubble Deep Field Photo

But, I didn’t really FALL into SPACE until I stood in the Duke planetarium and gazed at the Deep Field Photo from the Hubble telescope. It took a minute or two for me to realize that the lights were not stars. They were GALAXIES. My mind didn’t really know what to do with that fact.

That was several years ago, God, and I don’t think I’ve gotten a better grasp of it yet. So I turn back to Madeleine L’Engle’s quote about SIZE DOESN’T MATTER. I find that a great comfort, God. Maybe holding that thought is what allows to me dare to sit her chatting with You.

And now this thought has crept into my mind — what if some day our galaxy shrinks the way our world has shrunk? I’m laughing, God. My Mind is definitely Not Ready for THAT!

But, then I remember that I was raised on ideas like that. Science Fiction took me through worm holes for space travel and did Time Travel, too. So, I suppose it isn’t so much that my Mind can’t deal with these facts — as it is that my Rational Mind 20th Century Mind can’t deal with them. Hmmm. Please, God, OPEN my mind and my heart.

Tagged with: countless galaxies, Perspectives, Stretching my mind
Posted in a matter of scale, Perspective, reframing, web of life

A Sabbath Day — Founded on Humility — Who Knew?

Posted on July 31, 2011 by a moment with god — 1 Comment

Light through Philodendron leaves

Good Morning, God!

A lovely, quiet Sabbath Day. I will be reading scripture in a couple of hours and playing scrabble with my Mom. But, that is pretty much all I have planned.

Maybe a walk with Kit after dinner? Everything else can wait. I do still have a TOWER of PILES on the dining room table. But truth be told, God, I could just toss the whole thing.

Aaah! So THIS is Sabbath Rest. I LOVE IT!

And the interesting — or horrifying — thing is, that retiring from being Arcadia’s library consultant has been a blessing for them! More people are involved — using their gifts and talents — to do meaningful work in the library.

And I am no longer “responsible” for doing more than I have the time, energy or inclination to do. Now, WHAT took me so long? Well, to be generous to myself, God, I did ASK if others WANTED to do what I was doing. But, looking back, of course, it was ESSENTIAL for me to DECIDE to STEP OUT OF THE PICTURE. To acknowledge to myself and everyone else it was too much for me.

Hmmm. That might have been the “sticking point”, God. Acknowledging it was TOO much for me to do and do well — that was painful. Sigh. Reality and Humility do look a lot alike. But, going back to Opposable Virtues, God. I was “responsible”, “loyal” and “faithful.” I didn’t want to stop until there was a “replacement.”

It reminds me of the story of how villages in Japan “fired the loyal soldier” who was returning from wars. First they THANKED and HONORED HIM for past services. Then the village elder stood up and announced that NOW he was needed as a productive worker in the community — a firing from one role and rehiring in another role. Ah, the old ways — a transition ritual!