Working on my Website and on Myself

Posted on January 22, 2013 by a moment with god — Leave a comment

A Bird of Paradise Flower carefully cropped to remove dead blooms from the photo

A photo of a Bird of Paradise Flower which I carefully cropped to remove dead blooms from the pictureMy

Good Evening, God!

I’ve been having a really satisfying time working on my website! I have patched together two “movies” from still photos. The first one was A Walk in Kapiolani Park and the second Dawn at Wawamalu Beach. Such fun!

But, as with most creative projects, there are technical difficulties. The major one is that the Apple Experts have been unable, as yet, to get extra music loops to load onto my GarageBand program. Trying, has consumed hours of my time and theirs. Still, God, I am grateful that paying a one-time fee enables me, for three years, to call for help.

Oops! A Nudge! Yes, You are reminding me that — except for Apple — I am not good at asking for help. Dang. Somewhere deep inside lies a Subprogram that believes I should be able to do everything without asking for help. . . . As I typed that just now I snorted! How STUPID! But, the doggone thing is hiding out of reach!

Oh! Yes, You are right, God. I CAN ask You to help me get rid of that dysfunctional sub-program. So I’m doing that now! And, now that I think of it: There are lots of dysfunctional subprograms I would like to get rid of. It would be wonderful to be able just ask You to clean them all out, all at once. But, sigh, I am pretty sure that I am supposed to ask for each one specifically.

More than that, God, I have to be willing to change and grow. I have to be willing to do the hard and (I fear) tedious work of building new habits and patterns. Please! Help me with that.

Tagged with: a do-it-myself mindset, building new habits, my need for help, needing to ASK for help
Posted in asking for help for myself, becoming the change I wish to see, being a beginner, hearing myself, responding to "nudges"

Save the DATE! March 7-9, 2013

Posted on January 19, 2013 by a moment with god — Leave a comment

HIM’s Honolulu Conference 3/7-9/13

Good Day, God!

I’m going over my 2013 calendar — reviewing my plans for the year. I’m excited by the upcoming Christian Conference in Honolulu March 7-9, sponsored by Hawaiian Islands Ministries (HIM). I’m lucky to live in Honolulu.

We’ll be hearing popular speakers like Tony Campolo. 58 speakers in all. The good news is that every session will be recorded, with CDs and MP3s available afterward.

The 5 Love Languages by Gary Chapman

One of the speakers I’m eager to hear is Gary Chapman — author of the Five Love Languages. The book has been enormously influential in my life. I thought I knew all about individual differences in how we express and experience love, but his book really opened my eyes!

Surprised by the Power of the Spirit by Jack Deere

Another MUST-hear speaker for me will be Jack Deere. I have heard him several times and watched him become more vulnerable and more compelling. Hearing about how his own experiences overcame his educational biases surely makes for convicting listening.

Every year there are speakers I don’t know — who turn out to have messages I need to hear.

The all-day pre-conference sessions on Thursday are a must for me, God. I’ll be going to the one on Prayer!

Please, God, I want a lot of folks to receive what Honolulu ’13 Conference has to offer. And I would REALLY LOVE it to have folks come from all over the world. They could come early to relax and then stay a few days after the three-day conference to let it all soak in — while they soak in the sun.

All they have to do is click on this Register Now link!

Tagged with: Christian Conference, Hawaiian Islands Ministries, inspirational speakers, The Word: Honolulu '13
Posted in breathing in Your Spirit, Celebrations, Faith, God wants to nourishes us, learning

New meanings for Upright

Posted on January 17, 2013 by a moment with god — 1 Comment

The morning Light and Shadows of January in Honolulu

Good Evening, God!

Today, an early morning walk with a dear friend and then a brief solo morning jog soothed me and cleared my head. Being with friends — being outdoors — both are therapeutic.

But the day shifted from soothing to challenging. I went with Kit to his chiropractor, Dr. Cracknell. Usually, I watch Kit get worked on. Aaah, but TODAY both of us were treated to an impromptu class.

It seems that nowadays NO ONE knows how to Stand, Sit or Walk. Blame it on school work or computers or the absence of strict parents and grandparents — the result is that we Westerners have our heads stuck forward. We are not like the African women who, thanks to perfect bodily alignment, can carry heavy pots on their heads.

During this “class,” Dr. Cracknell explained that if our head is one inch forward of plumb, we double the stress on our back muscles. If our head is two inches forward we quadruple our muscle stress. It is an exponential relationship. Yikes!

Well, understanding is not enough! Both Kit and I have to learn how to DO it. We have to find and strengthen the small muscles that are designed to do the constant work of holding us upright.

I just reread what I said — that it’s small muscles that work all the time to keep us Upright. Wow! That’s the same way we keep morally upright, isn’t it! It’s a constant flow of small choices — and small decisions — that helps keep us from big temptations. And, DUH! It is how we regulate our weight, too! And, oh yes, also our spending.

Aah, God, I am beginning to see that becoming upright affects all my many layers. Please help me!

Tagged with: being in alignment, muscle stress, small choices, small decisions, small muscles, standing upright
Posted in asking for help for myself, Balancing and adjustments, Cherishing our Bodies, layer upon layer, slow incremental change

Dying: “It’s not so bad . . .”

Posted on January 16, 2013 by a moment with god — 3 Comments

A hibiscus in the process of unfurling

Good Evening, God!

I was just going to go to bed, God. I’m tired. And worried about my mom. Maybe, even, a bit depressed. But, then I remembered my photos of my friend June’s hibiscus. Really, God, they are too wonderful not to share.

Besides, it will do me good to sit with You. Sit without words — for a few minutes. Really, God, You know my heart . It is way too full to speak.

My mom complains about not being able to think. That’s probably because most of her mind is worried about dying. I can understand that. At 98 one does have to think about that. I must say, You have been most kind. It was just a few weeks ago that You had Patty come (in a a dream or vision or ?) and tell her, “Don’t be afraid, Grandma. It [dying] is not so bad.” I do have to remind Mom of that. When I do, she always lights up and smiles. She remembers it!

a fully extended hibiscus with a bud behind it

A fully extended hibiscus with a bee at stamen base

Ah, there, God, I’m feeling a little better. Those are comforting words for me, too. I am thinking of the 23rd Psalm and the verse which says Thy rod and thy staff, they comfort me. I used to think that Your rod and staff were to protect me. Now, I feel they are for me to lean on.

I do know that we humans need one another. You have made us Social Beings. And sharing seems to me to be a huge part of our nature.

Some days I feel like this hibiscus on the right — fully extended! I like that! But, I need the “furled up” times, too.

Thank You, God for the gift of Life — the ups and the downs!

Tagged with: 23rd Psalm, comfort, Death, dying, mothers
Posted in a hand up, accepting my need for help, comfort, encourage and comfort, Families, Mothers

Permission to Color OUTSIDE the lines!

Posted on January 13, 2013 by a moment with god — 1 Comment

A drawing I did at 6 -- which my mother saved -- of all things!

A drawing I did at 6 — one of many my mother saved!

Good Afternoon, God!

I really love letting children draw — not color in coloring books — just draw! I did a lot of drawing as a child and loved it. I have happy memories of drawing while listening to Captain Midnight, Buck Rogers, The Lone Ranger and others.

How fortunate I am that my mother didn’t buy me Coloring Books! My take is that little girls — who get small muscle control earlier than boys — are “trapped” by their skill in coloring inside the lines. We get praised and rewarded for being so neat and tidy.

The result of all that praise is that ever afterward, females feel they must “keep inside the lines.” Of course, we don’t feel that consciously! But, I think that being good at that “skill” imprisons many of us. Turning us into rule keepers. Turning us into Good Little Girls.

So, God, you can imagine my JOY when I read Father Richard Rohr’s morning devotion: “This is what makes the mystics sort of dangerous,” he says. “It’s not just possibility they [mystics] experience—but permission. It’s permission to color outside the lines.” Right ON! Father Rohr!

Sigh, I’ve harbored the illusion that I was good at coloring outside the lines. Only to find this January 1st that I have a Part that is dedicated to the goal of Make No Mistakes! How humbling! I know You delight in my Humbling Moments, God, but I dislike them! After all, they mean: I’ve been doing something wrong — again!

Smile, actually, what they really mean is: Hurray! I have just discovered that I have been coloring inside the lines! And now I can stop that so I can be a bit more free — a bit more me. Please help me hold on to that re-frame, God!

Tagged with: coloring inside the lines, creativity vs tidiness, humility reappreciated, permission to be messy, Permission to make mistakes
Posted in accepting my ability to REDESIGN, Art, courage to see myself, Creating, humility, Uncategorized

Intra Communication and the Holy Spirit

Posted on January 12, 2013 by a moment with god — 2 Comments

Rainbows and the Holy Spirit

Good Evening, God!

C. S. Lewis said that two Christians have ten times the power of one Christian. I experience the reality of that truth every time I drive up Tantalus to see my spiritual director, June. As we sit together — consciously aware of Your Presence — I am helped to see myself and hear myself.

Hearing myself is hard, God. But just yesterday I heard a phrase that helped me understand why it’s so hard. Apparently, we have a plethora of systems or modules inside us. Some are distributed on the left or right side of our brains and some are distributed across the brain. PLETHORA! I looked it up and it is a “superabundance, an excess.”

Sigh, sometimes that is exactly what it feels like, God. Too many Modules trying to decide who’s in charge right now. It’s like a log jam with No One In Charge and Nothing Getting Done. Golly, I thought it was hard enough just to juggle all the diverse Roles we women manage. Now I realize the roles are just the surface.

Who’s In Charge?

The phrase about my inner plethora is from the book Who’s In Charge?, by Michael Gazzaniga. I’m only on chapter 3, God, but, I have this funny feeling that the author is going to tell me that I (the one talking with You) am the one in charge.

I do know that ever since I “agreed” to a Grand Alliance with my Warrior Spirit that she has been very helpful. Then January 1st I “turned down” the hyper-vigilent Critical Spirit and gave myself permission to Make Mistakes. Because I was allowed to “make mistakes” I was able to navigate the tedious and err prone path of getting my website up.

So, I am learning HOW to work together with my Plethora of Inner Peoples. But, please, God, keep on helping me!

Tagged with: a plethora of systems, Hearing myself, intra dialogs, Who's In Charge?
Posted in a New Year, accepting my need for help, Balancing and adjustments, Holy Spirit, mental maps

Running a good race — running for respect

Posted on January 7, 2013 by a moment with god — Leave a comment

“Get the hell out of my race and give me those numbers.” 1967 Boston Marathon

Good Evening, God!

A good friend sent this photo from the 1967 Boston Marathon. It shows Katherine Switzer, who had entered as K.J. Switzer, being grabbed in a failed attempt to pull her off the course. She had been found to be (gasp!) a female. The marathon through its first 70 years had been an all-male event.

Women were considered too “delicate” to do anything as grueling as run 26.2 miles. Myself, I think women are a lot more durable than men. After all, it’s women who give birth to children — not an easy task!

I’m embarrassed, God, that I wasn’t even that aware of — let alone indignant — about sexism back them. I was busy having children and being a mother. That is not an excuse. Indeed, who should be more aware of sexism than the mother of three daughters.

This issue was brought home to me a year ago when Kit and I met Jacqueline Hansen, who had sued the Olympic Committee, successfully, to allow women to run in the 1984 Olympics. I’m thankful for people like Katherine and Jacqueline who stepped forward to help all women. Of course “steps forward” are mostly met with outrage.

Society could do with a lot more female outrage, God. Women in India are now speaking out after the recent horrific gang rape and murder of a young woman. Sigh. It is a long slow road to mutual respect, God.

Father Richard Rohr wrote: “slavery, racism, sexism, classism, xenophobia, and homophobia have lasted authoritatively into our time [in part because of inaction] by people who claim to love Jesus!”

We need to come to You for help, God! All of us!

Tagged with: Boston Marathon 1967, outrage, sexism, speaking up
Posted in a prayer for healing, acknowledging another's existence, Progress and our Change in Focus, respect, responding to God's Spirit, role models

n

Posted on January 4, 2013 by a moment with god — 2 Comments

More and more soda being drunk in America

Good Evening, God!

I was raised in a family that didn’t drink soda pop. I remember thinking that Coke tasted like fly spray. I’m lucky!

Just this morning, God, my wonderful husband Kit was angry about the amount of soda being drunk around the world arguing WE OUGHT TO TAX SODAS, just like cigarettes! No other single product is more responsible for the nation’s obesity epidemic, he argues. I think Kit is right, God.

Scientists say that sugar, and its horrible cheaper alternative high fructose corn syrup (HFCS), are both toxic and addictive. I do know they’re addictive! I can’t consume just one of anything sweet. So, I have to see myself as a sugarholic.

All of this assumes new importance as our Nation faces the swelling costs of Medicare. Personally, God, I’d say we haven’t seen anything yet on the matter of costs! Catchy, fun commercials for Coke, Pepsi et all, along with larger containers, are producing fatter and fatter Americans! Beyond that, diabetes has become epidemic. Health problems are cascading.

I’d been thinking of drinking soda as a matter of Personal Responsibility, God. But then I watched a great video calling it a Public Health problem. Oh? Like smoking? Like the campaign to pick a designated driver? Hmmm. Why not? These experts suggest taxing sodas, to pay for educating Americans on the health hazards of sweeteners. At stake is Medicare’s swelling cost burden — many other public health care costs — and, not least, people’s quality of life.

Sigh. Taking on Coca-Cola and Pepsi? Yikes! We are talking about miracles, God! But, we can pray. We can humbly seek your help. And we can begin to speak out!

Tagged with: obesity and medicare, personal responsibility and public health, rising soda consumption
Posted in a prayer for healing, accepting my authority to set limits, health, living within limits

A Full Day, and a Monk Seal, too!

Posted on January 3, 2013 by a moment with god — Leave a comment

A Monk Seal on San Souci Beach at the east end of Waikiki

Good Evening, God!

Such a FULL day . . . a day of rain showers and rainbows . . . of visits and outings . . . and my first sight of a Monk Seal! I was eating at the Hau Tree Lanai and there it was on the beach. It was alone because protective yellow tape had been put up to keep curious people away from him (or her). The species is officially endangered and there are laws about even getting too close.

These monk seals are solitary creatures, God. So unlike the cheerful and very social dolphins. Hmm. I just read yesterday that people with good social support networks have a longevity edge. I would think being gregariousness would give a species a survival edge as well.

So many good things in my day today . . . visits with friends, with Kit and with Mom . . . acupuncture treatment at Jujube’s . . . and some good work in the morning on getting my website rebuilt and ready to put up. I’m really thankful about that, God! And I do think that giving myself permission to make mistakes was a big part of that.

Before then, if anyone had asked me about “mistakes,” I would have gone on (and on) about how we learn by making mistakes. Indeed, that is how we are designed to learn. But, it seems that my gut didn’t get the message. That part of me wanted to know “how to do things” before doing them. But, Life seems to be a Learn As We Go, sort of deal.

One difficulty, God, is that big gap between what we know — and what we do. For example, I know that right now I should be getting ready for bed. I know it and I feel it. So, with a bit of help from You, I AM off to bed!

Tagged with: a survival edge, knowing and doing gaps, monk seal
Posted in learning, so much to learn, The difficulty of changing, Uncategorized

A New Year and a New Leaf

Posted on January 1, 2013 by a moment with god — Leave a comment

Interacting with the exhibit, The Shape of Things, at the Spaulding House

Daughter Suzanne Interacts with the exhibit, The Shape of Things, at the Spaulding House

Good Evening, God!

Our daughter Suzanne told me recently that each year she comes up with a Word for The Year. She hasn’t discovered her word for 2013 yet, but I was inspired by her idea.

So, I have come up with a phrase for myself — but maybe just for January. It is: I have permission to make mistakes. It came to me as I read a quote in the morning newspaper. It was from a “handyman,” who said that each of us can do anything if we allow ourselves to make mistakes. That’s not exactly the quote. But it’s close.

Really, God, reading that simple quote made me aware of how much I hate (fear) to mess up. I guess that must be the part of me that loved to do well in school. And doing well in school meant — Doing it Right!

Actually, I never got straight A’s. And I didn’t realize just how big an imprint “school” had left on me. But, this morning, once I officially gave myself permission to make mistakes — to do it wrong the first several times — I felt ever so much better. In fact, I went to my computer and — after struggling — was able to insert a revised story into my website.

Of course, God, I haven’t got my website back up yet! That’s going to involve a whole bunch more Missteps and Mistakes. I can feel them looming.

Still, God, I feel as if I have crossed some sort of invisible hump. I sure hope so because I really do want to get back to sharing my stories. In fact, I want to get back to creating stories! Creating and sharing are both joys!