A Special Time in Tucson

purple cactus, yellow flowers

purple cactus, yellow flowers

Good Morning, God!

Oh Happy the Mother and Grandmother who is able to visit her children and grandchildren . . . My heart overflows with gratitude!

If we are fortunate, God, life is a long journey. I’m thankful that I’ve been fortunate.

I’m smiling at this photo of a cactus. There are cacti in the most fortunate of lives. Sharp spikes to look out for — but also  bright flowers — bringing joy.

I guess, God, that I am thinking in terms of a Journey because of my recent travels.  Right now I’m in Tucson with my youngest daughter, Sandy and her family. Monday I will go to LA to visit our oldest daughter, Suzanne . And Kit and I are both just returned from our trip to New England for Kit to run the Boston Marathon. That’s a lot of traveling.

We are off in just a few moments to see our grandson Mark star as Jake in the Neil Simon’s play Jake’s Women. Mark did a fabulous job last night and so we are all much more relaxed than we were before his first performance.

Now we’re back from another great performance and a dinner with Mark afterwards. As he observed, “After the play is over you become aware that you are really hungry!”

So now, God, we are all off to an early bedtime to read and relax before falling asleep. Thank You so much that I was able to fly out to be part of the excitement and celebration! Thank You for so many blessings.

Now, please God, help all of us who have been blessed — to become blessings for others.

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Posted in connecting, family visits, gratitude, LOVE, Mothers

Practicing the Art of Relabeling

a kayak skimming the surface of the water

A kayak skimming the surface of the water

Good Day, God!

True friends are an enormous blessing!  Yesterday while I was doing my Monday morning walk with a dear friend, she told me: Running successfully isn’t just about running. It is a package deal. To do it right, one has to stretch and be sure to exercise the oppositional muscles to the ones used in running. Simply running isn’t enough!

Sigh. A cold dose of reality was splashed over me. It wasn’t that I didn’t “know” that — it was that I was choosing to ignore it. Hmm. That’s really easy to do, isn’t it, God. It’s so easy to see the shiny surface and forget all the work that has to go on beneath.

I listened to my friend. And yesterday I stretched and ran. Today I didn’t run but I stretched — only 6 minutes worth — but, I will improve. I say that with a rueful smile, God. My past record shows that I am indeed a sprinter . . . I’m not by nature inclined to handle the long steady grind so essential to training well — and to living well.

Hmm. Perhaps, part of the problem is the “label” grind. Stretching is hardly a grind! This morning I listened to a podcast from On Being and was finished in no time. If I could relabel it “small daily self-care,” that would make it easier to stick with it. What am I saying? Of course I can relabel it!

And, looking around me here in my office, I can see that I have lots of opportunities to rethink and relabel. Yes, I guess making a list would be a good place to begin.

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Posted in accepting my ability to REDESIGN, Persistence, Planning, Possibilities, self care as self compassion and humility

My Crossing the Finish Line is Just the Beginning

balloons at the Jamba Juice 5K finish line

Balloons at the Jamba Juice 5K finish line

Good Evening, God!

Thank You for a wonderful weekend! I am not sore . . . not lame . . . not even stiff! Thanks again!

On Friday I said to my mom, “Guess what Mom, tomorrow I am going to run 3.1 miles, the Jamba Juice 5K, an annual fundraising run. My mom, who even at 98 has all her marbles, replied, “Whatever for?” Without a pause I said, “To make my husband happy!” My mom smiled and said, “That’s a very good thing to do!”

Yes, making my wonderful husband Kit happy is a very good thing to do. My running the 5K was what we call a Love Gift. That term came either from books by Gary Chapman or maybe Gary Smalley. They have both written wonderfully practical books on relationships. And the idea of giving love gifts — making deposits in each other’s Love Bank Account — has been particularly useful for Kit and me.

Right now, Kit is downstairs doing the dishes and listening to the radio after I cooked the dinner. That’s taking turns — sharing the workload — and that is important.

Aah, but a Love Gift is doing something special we know will greatly please the Other . . . something we find difficult or maybe just challenging. For me running is both of those. I do want to be fit, of course. And I do understand the importance of exercise for physical and mental fitness. BUT, running regularly takes TIME.

That means that beyond resolving to do runs, I have to to plan when I am going to do them. Hmm. Well, yes, God, it does take me about as long to write a blog as it does to go out for a run.

Sigh. And yes, God, if I always did a run before doing a blog, I would be fit in no time. Thank You, God. That’s a helpful thought!

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Posted in Giving, LOVE, Motivation, relationships

Making the Most of Home and Failures

Panda Express to go -- eaten on the Hawaii Kai Marina

Panda Express dinner to go — eaten on the Hawaii Kai Marina

Good Morning, God!

We’re HOME! And yesterday I hit the road running. It was a day full of the things I love best — being with friends and family!

This morning I shall actually begin my re-running activity here at home in Honolulu. When I was sharing this with a friend she said (not unkindly) I’ve heard that before!

True, God, she has heard me say that before . . . but I think it was Winston Churchill who defined Success as “Going from one failure to the next with undiminished enthusiasm.”

I love new days and new beginnings. And if I am willing to learn from my failures then I do count them as successes. I think, for example of the night back in Bar Harbor, Maine when I wrestled with the loss of a beloved black sweater. I tossed and turned all night with waves of regret, self-recrimination and a sprinkling of rage — only very grudgingly offering up the Sacrifice (an act of Will, not Feelings) of Praise for the loss of my sweater. Finally, I arrived at a peaceful sense of release. The sweater had been “recycled” into my hands — surely I could recycle it into other hands. I could bless whoever found it and stop cursing myself for losing it.

A friend told me later that I had Passed the Test. I liked that, God, even if I had passed with a D+. But on further consideration I see that whole night of wrestling with Wanting and Releasing as a very special exercise — helping me to grow — if not up, then to grow closer to up.

Sigh. The Future holds many other opportunities for me to exercise “releasing Beloved Wants” into Your Hands. May the memory of the Black Sweater encourage me!

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Posted in growing toward up, Praise, Sacrifice, so much to learn

Traveling Time and Space

A farm fire pit on the 1838 circa Old Sturbridge Village

A farm fire pit on the 1838 circa Old Sturbridge Village

Good Evening, God!

Tomorrow we fly home . . . I’m ready, God! Really ready! Both my wonderful husband, Kit, and I have rested and mostly recovered from the Boston Marathon tragedy. Still, God, there is a certain amount of wear and tear involved in traveling.

Ah, but not as much wear and tear as earlier! On our trips Kit drives while I navigate. I love watching that small blue ball travel along the map on my iPhone! Now I know right away when we have made a wrong turn!

It’s so different from the life folks lived back in the 18oos. Kit and I took a trip back in time today when we visited Old Sturbridge Village which portrays farm life in 1838. One of the things that surprised me was this fire pit. It was used almost all year long. Big pots were hung over it for cooking, for heating water for laundry, making soap, boiling maple syrup, and cleaning the fleece from sheep so they could turn it into wool and then into clothing.

All those tasks were made more “real” by seeing this fire pit. Those tasks were a normal part of farm life. Gosh, my mother’s father grew up on a farm and one of his sisters made her own soap for years. Speaking of soap, one sign in the Village said that soap was just coming into use in the 1830s. Before that water and a good scrub was what they used. Yikes! No soap, no deodorant, no electricity . . . no iPhones!

And now I stop and try to imagine 2138 . . . I can’t even begin . . . even with the help of Star Trek. . .

So, thank You, God. Thank You that I live in This Time, and in This Place. And truly, the best part of traveling is coming home.

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Posted in God's Time, gratitude, Perspective, time

Effort vs Easy: A Joint Venture

Kit running hard at mile 20.5 of the Boston Marathon

Kit running hard at mile 20.5 of the Boston Marathon

Good Day, God!

This is such a happy photo of my amazing husband, Kit, but until now it didn’t seem right to share it. When I took this photo Kit was about five miles away from finishing the Boston Marathon. When he got within a mile of the finish line, two bomb blasts would shatter the experience for him and all of Boston.

But, today, I don’t want to write about bombs . . . I want to write in praise of Kit . . . and in praise of effort. Effort seems to be catching on these days. Marathons will always be the epitome of effort in my mind — and now they have been joined by ultra marathons and triathlons.

Effort takes grit, God. I used to think I didn’t have much grit. A friend sent me a twist on the old saying, “No Pain, No Gain!” It quotes a wise doctor saying,  “No Pain . . .GOOD!” I got a good laugh. That has long been my philosophy.

Just this morning it came to me that both Kit and I exert fair bits of effort, but toward different goals. My energy goes into paying attention to people and circumstances. Kit’s focus goes into physical training . . . running. In conversations, he often fails to pay proper attention.

So — we have come to an agreement. I will start regular running in ernest. And Kit will work on focus and paying attention. Actually, we have both already started. This morning I logged my third run on this trip — a real achievement for me. Kit, later this morning, caught me putting something down randomly — instead of putting it away!

Sharing the challenge of expanding our areas of effort feels good, God. In fact, it feels better than good — it feels right!

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Posted in Energy, exercising, grit, growing toward up

Lost and Found in Bar Harbor, Maine

one of many bays and harbors in Acadia National Park

one of many bays and harbors in Acadia National Park

Good Morning, God!

The sunlight is bright on the water outside our room fronting Bar Harbor. My wonderful husband Kit has gone for a walk to take photos along the history-rich pathway that starts at the hotel. I have had another 10 hour night’s sleep. And I am happy!

Relaxed . . . Peaceful . . . Content.

But so often these feelings come only after a struggle. My struggle came the night we arrived here. After the car had been completely unloaded, my favorite sweater was missing. I had worn this sweater every day — and some nights — on our trip. I had bought it for $5 at a church rummage sale near Dartmouth College two years ago. It was a black cashmere zip-up cardigan — and I loved it.

My mind churned most of the night as I thought back to where I could have left it. Churning is a kind word for what my mind was doing. I was miserable! Self recrimination, regret, grief and anger are only a few of the emotions that were storming around inside me.

Finally, I attempted, God, to offer up the sacrifice of praise to You — praising You for the loss of the sweater. That was so hard! But after several efforts to offer up praise — in between dozing — it came to me that the Sweater had been “recycled” into my hands . . . and perhaps I could allow it to be “recycled” into other hands. By the end of that long, long night I had (mostly) opened my hands to pass on the sweater. And, I had also realized that the sweater represented all sorts of Other Losses in my Life — Past, Present and Pending.

So, here I am, God, right now in a peaceful inner harbor — trusting You — after that night of not trusting. Please help me to remember to Trust You sooner in the next storm!

And, as a lovely postscript — after calling L.L Bean the next morning to check their lost and found — I found my sweater on the floor of the back seat of our car.

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Posted in Anger, Grief, Praise, Prayer, Regret -- acknowledging and releasing it

Leaving Cape Cod

A Chickadee eating sunflower seeds out of my hand in the Beech Forest

A Chickadee eating sunflower seeds out of my hand in the Beech Forest

Good Evening, God!

It was hard to leave Cape Cod, God. We spent two nights each with Lucy and then Floy, two friends made years ago. Actually, we ended up staying a third night with Floy. That was after she told me about Beech Forest at the tip of the Cape, where generations of chickadees have grown up eating seeds out of people’s hands. It was irresistible!

So we adjusted our plans and Floy drove us out to the top of the Cape — stopping for me to take photos along the way.

a chickadee flying away from eating out of my hand

A chickadee flying away after eating out of my hand.

Once there, the chickadees were waiting for us — and quickly lit on our hands — just long enough to snatch a seed and fly off. The feel of their little feet grasping my fingers was a thrill. Those fleeting contacts brought ripples of joy. Perhaps the writer who dubbed Pets as Vitamin P was right, God. Pets do center us. But, a connection with wild creatures seems even more powerful.

I’m smiling, God. I feel as if our visit to Cape Cod was just as brief as that of a chickadee on my hand. And we too, shall soon fly off home.

I’m writing from Andover, Mass., where Kit went to school more than 60 years ago. Years before females attended . . . and years before the school opened itself to broader spectrums of young people.

Hmm. We are not done opening ourselves, are we God. Or I should say I am not done. The world is so full of such wonderful things, . . . Thank You!

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Posted in connecting, connections, friends, small meaningful moments, web of life

Shells, Seaweed and Seagulls

Seagulls

Seagulls at Nantucket Sound

Good Afternoon, God!

We’ve had a quiet day with a dear friend from long ago. A relaxing walk between the Bass River and Long Island Sound. A time of repose. It is good to rest, God. Good to come to a full stop and be at ease — after our Boston Marathon bombing trauma just five days ago.

I had thought I wanted to go to Nantucket Island. But perhaps not. I am at rest and happy to remain at rest. How good to be staying with friends — to enter into their worlds — worlds replete with birds and bird feeders. And, of course, the squirrels that eat the seeds that the birds drop.

I have had enough of the traumas of bombs and manhunts.

kelp and shells at low tide

Kelp and shells at low tide

How good to focus on small things! To delight in simple treasures of shells and seaweed and seagulls. We three were alone on the walk . . . except for the birds and a very few fellow walkers.

So good to be in Cape Cod in the off season. And even better to be in Cape Cod with dear friends. I am so very thankful!

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Posted in friends, rest, seeing

Evil in Our Small and Precious World

The Atlantic Ocean off of Cape Cod

The Atlantic Ocean off of Cape CodGood Morning, God!

Yesterday we went to the ocean side of Cape Cod — peaceful and quiet — and then this morning we watched on TV the manhunt for the younger of the two Boston Marathon bombers. Such a sad and sobering contrast.

We heard the uncle of the bomber pleading for his nephew to turn himself in and ask for forgiveness. The uncle said that his nephew had brought shame on the family and on all the people of Chechnya. Dear God, please keep us from stigmatizing a whole group of people with the evil done by a few. The people of Chechnya have suffered themselves. All of us have suffered in one way or another.

I think of how a dear Cypriot neighbor in San Diego hated the Turks. And how our daughter Suzanne has a dear friend who is a Turk. Then there were the bombing done by the Irish Republican Army not that long ago — so much hating.

It seems to me, God, that Evil is very like a hermit crab. It scuttles under one shell or another to make its home. The crab merely “borrows” the shell. The shell is just a temporary home. So, then we all ought to be diligent — not letting Evil disguise itself as one of us — as one of Our People or one of Our Faith Traditions. We ought not share our “shells” with Evil.

Like the uncle we must speak out — begging the Small and Stunted and Confused to turn themselves in — to beg for forgiveness.

Hmm. Perhaps we ALL need to beg forgiveness as we have all taken our turn at hating and blaming. A sobering thought, God.

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Posted in connecting, opportunities to forgive myself, Praying for our enemies, Rethinking, speaking

Blogs I Follow
No Days Adhesives

Stained Glass, Glass Fusing and Mosaic Adhesives

Brené Brown

chatting and sometimes, listening

Rachel Naomi Remen

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A Moment with God

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Sacred Dance Guild Journal

Since 1958 articles by members & guests offer news about activities, history, Sacred Dance practices, profiles of Sacred Dancers, choreography, images & illustrations.

Victoria Paulsen

How to Step In -- Substitute Teaching

No Days Adhesives

Stained Glass, Glass Fusing and Mosaic Adhesives

Brené Brown

chatting and sometimes, listening

Rachel Naomi Remen

chatting and sometimes, listening

A Moment with God

chatting and sometimes, listening

Sacred Dance Guild Journal

Since 1958 articles by members & guests offer news about activities, history, Sacred Dance practices, profiles of Sacred Dancers, choreography, images & illustrations.

Victoria Paulsen

How to Step In -- Substitute Teaching