Good Evening, God!
Thank You for flowering trees that promise — be it ever so quietly — the approach of Spring! I see Spring in Hawaii, too. But it comes in the brilliant yellow of the gold trees — it comes by showering my eyes with colors.
There are no biting winds for the colors to overcome. It is just a slight turning of the dial of climatic perfection. Mother Nature is overwhelmingly gracious in Hawaii — even her rain is gentle.
True, we have a very occasional hurricane or tsunami . . . but it has been decades since one of those, and so we short-term-minded humans have forgotten.
Things “not-in-our-lifetime” are not things at all. We can remember, albeit poorly. But to imagine that which we have never experienced? We fail. They are but words washing over us . . . or maybe photos or videos . . . but still having only a shadowy existence.
So, God, it is good to be here in Boston — all bundled up against the chilly spring winds and temperatures. It reminds me that I have been cold before. It makes me realize how fortunate I am to live in Hawaii. And as I sit here — feeling peaceful — I am only dimly aware of the anxiety that grabs ahold of me when my wonderful husband Kit runs a marathon.
Ah, but tomorrow morning, starting around 10:40 when Kit begins in the Third Wave of runners in the Boston Marathon I shall experience it again! If Kit’s per-mile times, which I can monitor on my iPhone, are as expected, Anxiety will sit quietly in check. But, if like in the Honolulu Marathon four months ago his times get progressively off, then Anxiety shall graband shake me until what little brain I have left comes loose.
I worry that I have not enough Trust, God. Sigh. But, then I think how very much trust I must have to “let” Kit run at all. But, to stop him from doing what he loves . . . just to spare myself . . . what kind of love would that be?