A Word of Comfort for My Mom — and for Me

Sun setting at Ala Moana Beach Park


Good Day, God!

When I catch sight of the Sun — as I did recently in my rearview mirror — I’m always surprised at how small it is. The same with the size of the moon. I guess, after all these years I’m surprised that I am still surprised. I like surprises, God. Well, mostly, I like surprises . . . some are more daunting.

Recently, my mom has been talking about The Big Surprise, Death. She confided to me that she has always been afraid of death. And as she nears becoming 98 Death is greatly on her mind. Yesterday, as we were taking a walk down her corridor she said, “It was good of her to do it, but I don’t know how she did it.” I asked her who did what? As the story unfolded, it seemed that Patty — our daughter who died at 18 from cancer — had told my mom, “You don’t have to be afraid. It isn’t so bad.” My mom was quite clear about the message — just not so clear about how or even when it had been delivered.

Not So Bad, God? At first I thought Patty was referring to Heaven and that did seem like faint praise. But, then it came to me that Patty was probably talking about dying — that often drawn-out-process-of-dying. When Patty was ill she had said she wasn’t afraid of being dead — it was dying that worried her.

Aah, God. How GOOD of You to have Patty deliver that comforting word to my Mom! Actually, I find it a very good word for me, too. Because I am my Mom’s companion in this process. Not So Bad, eh? I’m going to hang on to that assurance God! Thank You!

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Story teller,

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Posted in being repotted, Caring, Choosing Meaning, daughters
3 comments on “A Word of Comfort for My Mom — and for Me
  1. I recently read that people are not afraid of dying, but how they are going to die.

    I also heard Steve Jobs and another young man said “Wow Wow” and “It is all so simple” while taking their last breaths…..I think I like the view that are souls are on this earth school for life lessons.

    I have always been comforted and moved by Patty’s story. I still remember the 2 lines of her poem: I mourn for life to beautiful to leave, Thank God I have so much to grieve. I have had the joy of sharing Patty’s story and word with my 9 & 12 year old as I teach them gratitude. I feel so honored to have known Patty’s story through you and Suzanne! Blessings!
    Renu

  2. Cheri Mahin says:

    a message from Patty: truly profound! Those kind of things don’t happen very often!

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