Good Day, God!
Anthuriums are slow to grow. They start out tightly furled. In fact, when they begin I can’t really tell if the shoot will turn out to be a leaf or a flower. It takes time for it to fully unfurl. Even when shoots are fully extended they continue to stretch out and grow.
I feel very much like this anthurium, God. I certainly don’t feel fully unfurled. Indeed, I’m not even sure if I am a leaf or a flower — an unsettling thought.
I feel good about the “still growing” part, God, even though I have lived long enough to know that “growing pains” are to be expected. Painful or not, we are called to grow.
Learning is part of it. But Head Learning is only a small part of it. Our Hearts are called to learn — called to learn compassion, called to learn to see each other as having the potential to become New Creatures.
When I think of “becoming” I find my mind going back to Calvin and his Transmogrifer. Wouldn’t that be wonderful, God! I could sit in my prayer chair / transmogrifer and BOINK just become a New Creature. A new improved model.
I guess that instant fix does happen to some folks — Saint Paul on the road to Damascus — folks instantly delivered from drug addictions or completely healed of terminal illnesses.
But, for me, Becoming or Unfurling is a slow business — very slow. And some days I revert to a tiny furled shoot that looks like it will be lucky to become a leaf. Sigh. No Spiritual Transmogrifiers?
Just as well, God. Because I an not a Product coming out with New Models. I am a Child. And Growth comes more from the Failing and Forgiving than from “getting IT right!”