Good Morning, God!
I am curled up in bed enjoying a SLOW morning. My Mother’s 96th Birthday lunch in her apartment went well. We brought in food, she opened presents and we played scrabble. Oh! Then we found the lovely flowers sent by my brother and Barba and took them back up to her. Beautiful!
My office is still jumbled, God. Well, actually, pretty much the whole house has an unkempt look — the part of me that PUTS STUFF AWAY has been otherwise occupied. I went on a long walk with Suz yesterday and realized that my own interior “house” needs a lot of stuff put away — or tossed out. Friends, daughters, therapists — people who hear us into hearing ourselves — are such a GIFT!
Rueful laugh. Aaah, but it takes me so LONG to hear what is going on inside of me. Or maybe it is just that the tides of change move along, but I only notice from time to time? And, YOU just pointed out, that even after I “notice” it takes time for me to integrate changes into my daily living patterns.
Old patterns of speaking and thinking are HARD to CHANGE. They are hard to DUMP — which is mostly what I would like to do with many of mine. The detritus of hundreds of years of “family” cultures — contaminating my words and actions. YUCK!
And so, God, BECOMING a NEW CREATURE in CHRIST is a difficult on-going challenge. Please, send Your Spirit of Compassion to wash through me — removing old “don’ts” and “do’s” from my behavior patterns. Help me in Extending to Myself the interest and attention I love to give to others!
It is scary for an extrovert to venture INSIDE and I need YOUR HELP!