The 360˚ Life — Or Tweaking It

Posted on May 21, 2013 by a moment with god — Leave a comment

Tweak It: Make What Matters to You Happen Every Day

Good Morning, God!

Here I am back in Tucson AND I did another 2 mile “mostly” jog yesterday morning with Sandy. That’s my 7th jog since the trip began early on May 8th — 13 days ago.

Two miles isn’t much. But, it is a Step in the Right Direction. And, I’m pleased, God.

Pleased, but “aware” that I am great at starting . . . and less good at sticking to things. So, that’s why I was so pleased to find the book Tweak It at my daughter Sandy’s neighborhood library.

It’s all about using small “tweaks” to create a better “fit” between Work and Life. The author, Cali Yost said that she changed the word “balance” to “fit” because the CEOs she talked to thought “balance” meant less work.

Apparently, God, some folks are naturals at knowing what they want and then feeling comfortable about arranging things to get it. One of the best sections was about how these naturals are totally unaware that most of us are clueless.

Hmm. Now that I stop and ponder what I just said, God, I realize that the key idea here for me is not so much the idea of seeing my life as tweakable — but rather 1) knowing what I really want and then 2) feeling comfortable about arranging things so as to get what I want.

It reminds me of the time in First Grade when the teacher assigned us One Wish and to come back and share our wish the next day. My wish (with the help of my Mother) was for World Peace. After all had shared the teacher informed us that we could have wished for More Wishes.

Sigh. I didn’t get it then. I barely get it now. Could it be, God, that we live in a World of Abundance? A World in which we get more than One Wish? A 360 degree World?

Tagged with: abundance, Cali Yost, small changes, Tweak It, wishes
Posted in a matter of scale, Abundant Life, accepting my ability to REDESIGN, authority over my life, Books, choices

Wonder: A Morning of Seeing and Hearing

Posted on May 13, 2013 by a moment with god — Leave a comment

a bird in flight in the sunlight

Good Morning, God!

Well, I’ve done three runs and three blogs here in Tucson. This morning I ran for a bit over two miles — stopping for photos. I cannot resist stopping to see! The world is such a lovely place, God.

And while I jogged along I listened to Katy Payne being interviewed on Krista Tippet’s podcast, On Being. Katy Payne has written a book on listening to elephants called Silent Thunder. She was the first to notice that elephants make infrasonic sounds. I think she was also the first to realize that humpback whales are singers. She said her discovers came in part because she never let go of being a child. I loved that!

Then I came back and drove my grandson Mark to school — listening to his plans for the day and for the week. He leaves on Thursday to be an alternate in the National Science Olympiad. Next I gave our daughter Sandy a hug as she left to do tutoring. And finally I ate breakfast on the lanai while chatting with our son (in-law) Dave.

The conversation with Dave was a continuation of our talk last night after dinner. I think I am finally understanding what he does, God. And I am very impressed by it — even if I can’t articulate it. Still, I do have a sense of how very much he knows. And how as a consultant one of his tasks is to see how processes and companies can be brought together for even better outcomes.

I loved listening to him — not that I was really learning — but I was at least tagging along on a journey into fascinating foreign lands. I love the ideas of science, but like most children, not the hard, slow work of science.

Tagged with: child-like, elephants, Katy Payne, whales, wonder
Posted in appreciation, beauty, connecting, listening, seeing, web of life

Walking in Sabino Canyon . . . and in Science

Posted on May 12, 2013 by a moment with god — 1 Comment

Dove dining on Saguaro flowers

Good Day, God!

This morning my daughter Sandy took me for a morning walk in Sabino Canyon.

A lovely way to start Mother’s Day! And to top it off I saw a dove dipping her head into the flowers at the top of a saguaro. I didn’t catch her with her head down. But I can see a bit of pollen on her head. Seeing this bird was an unexpected delight.

Another unexpected delight was this story my wonderful husband emailed me from NPR. It was in their “most emailed stories” section.

The thinking now is that instead of rinsing off a baby’s pacifier when it falls on the floor — the parents should suck it clean for them. The parent’s saliva would expose their baby to a wider number of “harmless” bacteria and thus improve the child’s microbiome. And that in turn would reduce the child’s chance of developing allergies like eczema and asthma. Hmm. This study was done in Sweden where apparently quite a few parents suck their baby’s pacifier to clean it.

I have to say, God — if I had given my kids pacifiers — it would never have occurred to me to clean a pacifier by putting it in my mouth. I, like our entire Western World have been germ phobic. Now I am working hard to process the idea of Germs as Friends and Allies. It seems we need to cultivate our germ friends and support them as best we can. They may be our best defense against enemy germs.

Can it be, God, that this Germs as Friends Reframe plays well across other levels? Research shows that just having good solid human friends improves our health. I like the idea of building friendships so much better than eliminating enemies! Making friends seems much the better long term policy!

Tagged with: Friends, germ phobia, health, saguaros, saliva
Posted in adjusting, friends, health, Mothers and Fathers, Perspective

A Special Time in Tucson

Posted on May 11, 2013 by a moment with god — 2 Comments

purple cactus, yellow flowers

Good Morning, God!

Oh Happy the Mother and Grandmother who is able to visit her children and grandchildren . . . My heart overflows with gratitude!

If we are fortunate, God, life is a long journey. I’m thankful that I’ve been fortunate.

I’m smiling at this photo of a cactus. There are cacti in the most fortunate of lives. Sharp spikes to look out for — but also bright flowers — bringing joy.

I guess, God, that I am thinking in terms of a Journey because of my recent travels. Right now I’m in Tucson with my youngest daughter, Sandy and her family. Monday I will go to LA to visit our oldest daughter, Suzanne . And Kit and I are both just returned from our trip to New England for Kit to run the Boston Marathon. That’s a lot of traveling.

We are off in just a few moments to see our grandson Mark star as Jake in the Neil Simon’s play Jake’s Women. Mark did a fabulous job last night and so we are all much more relaxed than we were before his first performance.

Now we’re back from another great performance and a dinner with Mark afterwards. As he observed, “After the play is over you become aware that you are really hungry!”

So now, God, we are all off to an early bedtime to read and relax before falling asleep. Thank You so much that I was able to fly out to be part of the excitement and celebration! Thank You for so many blessings.

Now, please God, help all of us who have been blessed — to become blessings for others.

Tagged with: being a blessing, blessed, families, gandmothers, gratitude
Posted in connecting, family visits, gratitude, LOVE, Mothers

Practicing the Art of Relabeling

Posted on May 7, 2013 by a moment with god — Leave a comment

A kayak skimming the surface of the water

Good Day, God!

True friends are an enormous blessing! Yesterday while I was doing my Monday morning walk with a dear friend, she told me: Running successfully isn’t just about running. It is a package deal. To do it right, one has to stretch and be sure to exercise the oppositional muscles to the ones used in running. Simply running isn’t enough!

Sigh. A cold dose of reality was splashed over me. It wasn’t that I didn’t “know” that — it was that I was choosing to ignore it. Hmm. That’s really easy to do, isn’t it, God. It’s so easy to see the shiny surface and forget all the work that has to go on beneath.

I listened to my friend. And yesterday I stretched and ran. Today I didn’t run but I stretched — only 6 minutes worth — but, I will improve. I say that with a rueful smile, God. My past record shows that I am indeed a sprinter . . . I’m not by nature inclined to handle the long steady grind so essential to training well — and to living well.

Hmm. Perhaps, part of the problem is the “label” grind. Stretching is hardly a grind! This morning I listened to a podcast from On Being and was finished in no time. If I could relabel it “small daily self-care,” that would make it easier to stick with it. What am I saying? Of course I can relabel it!

And, looking around me here in my office, I can see that I have lots of opportunities to rethink and relabel. Yes, I guess making a list would be a good place to begin.

Tagged with: discipline or self-care?, healthy-living, reality, relabeling, renaming, rethinking
Posted in accepting my ability to REDESIGN, Persistence, Planning, Possibilities, self care as self compassion and humility

My Crossing the Finish Line is Just the Beginning

Posted on May 5, 2013 by a moment with god — Leave a comment

Balloons at the Jamba Juice 5K finish line

Good Evening, God!

Thank You for a wonderful weekend! I am not sore . . . not lame . . . not even stiff! Thanks again!

On Friday I said to my mom, “Guess what Mom, tomorrow I am going to run 3.1 miles, the Jamba Juice 5K, an annual fundraising run. My mom, who even at 98 has all her marbles, replied, “Whatever for?” Without a pause I said, “To make my husband happy!” My mom smiled and said, “That’s a very good thing to do!”

Yes, making my wonderful husband Kit happy is a very good thing to do. My running the 5K was what we call a Love Gift. That term came either from books by Gary Chapman or maybe Gary Smalley. They have both written wonderfully practical books on relationships. And the idea of giving love gifts — making deposits in each other’s Love Bank Account — has been particularly useful for Kit and me.

Right now, Kit is downstairs doing the dishes and listening to the radio after I cooked the dinner. That’s taking turns — sharing the workload — and that is important.

Aah, but a Love Gift is doing something special we know will greatly please the Other . . . something we find difficult or maybe just challenging. For me running is both of those. I do want to be fit, of course. And I do understand the importance of exercise for physical and mental fitness. BUT, running regularly takes TIME.

That means that beyond resolving to do runs, I have to to plan when I am going to do them. Hmm. Well, yes, God, it does take me about as long to write a blog as it does to go out for a run.

Sigh. And yes, God, if I always did a run before doing a blog, I would be fit in no time. Thank You, God. That’s a helpful thought!

Tagged with: Fitness, love gifts, Running, self-discipline
Posted in Giving, LOVE, Motivation, relationships

Making the Most of Home and Failures

Posted on May 2, 2013 by a moment with god — Leave a comment

Panda Express to go -- eaten on the Hawaii Kai Marina

Panda Express dinner to go — eaten on the Hawaii Kai Marina

Good Morning, God!

We’re HOME! And yesterday I hit the road running. It was a day full of the things I love best — being with friends and family!

This morning I shall actually begin my re-running activity here at home in Honolulu. When I was sharing this with a friend she said (not unkindly) I’ve heard that before!

True, God, she has heard me say that before . . . but I think it was Winston Churchill who defined Success as “Going from one failure to the next with undiminished enthusiasm.”

I love new days and new beginnings. And if I am willing to learn from my failures then I do count them as successes. I think, for example of the night back in Bar Harbor, Maine when I wrestled with the loss of a beloved black sweater. I tossed and turned all night with waves of regret, self-recrimination and a sprinkling of rage — only very grudgingly offering up the Sacrifice (an act of Will, not Feelings) of Praise for the loss of my sweater. Finally, I arrived at a peaceful sense of release. The sweater had been “recycled” into my hands — surely I could recycle it into other hands. I could bless whoever found it and stop cursing myself for losing it.

A friend told me later that I had Passed the Test. I liked that, God, even if I had passed with a D+. But on further consideration I see that whole night of wrestling with Wanting and Releasing as a very special exercise — helping me to grow — if not up, then to grow closer to up.

Sigh. The Future holds many other opportunities for me to exercise “releasing Beloved Wants” into Your Hands. May the memory of the Black Sweater encourage me!

Tagged with: Exercises, Failure, Growing Up, home, Learning
Posted in growing toward up, Praise, Sacrifice, so much to learn

Traveling Time and Space

Posted on April 29, 2013 by a moment with god — 2 Comments

A farm fire pit on the 1838 circa Old Sturbridge Village

Good Evening, God!

Tomorrow we fly home . . . I’m ready, God! Really ready! Both my wonderful husband, Kit, and I have rested and mostly recovered from the Boston Marathon tragedy. Still, God, there is a certain amount of wear and tear involved in traveling.

Ah, but not as much wear and tear as earlier! On our trips Kit drives while I navigate. I love watching that small blue ball travel along the map on my iPhone! Now I know right away when we have made a wrong turn!

It’s so different from the life folks lived back in the 18oos. Kit and I took a trip back in time today when we visited Old Sturbridge Village which portrays farm life in 1838. One of the things that surprised me was this fire pit. It was used almost all year long. Big pots were hung over it for cooking, for heating water for laundry, making soap, boiling maple syrup, and cleaning the fleece from sheep so they could turn it into wool and then into clothing.

All those tasks were made more “real” by seeing this fire pit. Those tasks were a normal part of farm life. Gosh, my mother’s father grew up on a farm and one of his sisters made her own soap for years. Speaking of soap, one sign in the Village said that soap was just coming into use in the 1830s. Before that water and a good scrub was what they used. Yikes! No soap, no deodorant, no electricity . . . no iPhones!

And now I stop and try to imagine 2138 . . . I can’t even begin . . . even with the help of Star Trek. . .

So, thank You, God. Thank You that I live in This Time, and in This Place. And truly, the best part of traveling is coming home.

Tagged with: home, Old Sturbridge Village, Time Travel, traveling
Posted in God's Time, gratitude, Perspective, time

Effort vs Easy: A Joint Venture

Posted on April 28, 2013 by a moment with god — 1 Comment

Kit running hard at mile 20.5 of the Boston Marathon

Good Day, God!

This is such a happy photo of my amazing husband, Kit, but until now it didn’t seem right to share it. When I took this photo Kit was about five miles away from finishing the Boston Marathon. When he got within a mile of the finish line, two bomb blasts would shatter the experience for him and all of Boston.

But, today, I don’t want to write about bombs . . . I want to write in praise of Kit . . . and in praise of effort. Effort seems to be catching on these days. Marathons will always be the epitome of effort in my mind — and now they have been joined by ultra marathons and triathlons.

Effort takes grit, God. I used to think I didn’t have much grit. A friend sent me a twist on the old saying, “No Pain, No Gain!” It quotes a wise doctor saying, “No Pain . . .GOOD!” I got a good laugh. That has long been my philosophy.

Just this morning it came to me that both Kit and I exert fair bits of effort, but toward different goals. My energy goes into paying attention to people and circumstances. Kit’s focus goes into physical training . . . running. In conversations, he often fails to pay proper attention.

So — we have come to an agreement. I will start regular running in ernest. And Kit will work on focus and paying attention. Actually, we have both already started. This morning I logged my third run on this trip — a real achievement for me. Kit, later this morning, caught me putting something down randomly — instead of putting it away!

Sharing the challenge of expanding our areas of effort feels good, God. In fact, it feels better than good — it feels right!

Tagged with: Boston Marathon, effort, exercise, grit, paying attention
Posted in Energy, exercising, grit, growing toward up

Lost and Found in Bar Harbor, Maine

Posted on April 27, 2013 by a moment with god — 1 Comment

one of many bays and harbors in Acadia National Park

Good Morning, God!

The sunlight is bright on the water outside our room fronting Bar Harbor. My wonderful husband Kit has gone for a walk to take photos along the history-rich pathway that starts at the hotel. I have had another 10 hour night’s sleep. And I am happy!

Relaxed . . . Peaceful . . . Content.

But so often these feelings come only after a struggle. My struggle came the night we arrived here. After the car had been completely unloaded, my favorite sweater was missing. I had worn this sweater every day — and some nights — on our trip. I had bought it for $5 at a church rummage sale near Dartmouth College two years ago. It was a black cashmere zip-up cardigan — and I loved it.

My mind churned most of the night as I thought back to where I could have left it. Churning is a kind word for what my mind was doing. I was miserable! Self recrimination, regret, grief and anger are only a few of the emotions that were storming around inside me.

Finally, I attempted, God, to offer up the sacrifice of praise to You — praising You for the loss of the sweater. That was so hard! But after several efforts to offer up praise — in between dozing — it came to me that the Sweater had been “recycled” into my hands . . . and perhaps I could allow it to be “recycled” into other hands. By the end of that long, long night I had (mostly) opened my hands to pass on the sweater. And, I had also realized that the sweater represented all sorts of Other Losses in my Life — Past, Present and Pending.

So, here I am, God, right now in a peaceful inner harbor — trusting You — after that night of not trusting. Please help me to remember to Trust You sooner in the next storm!

And, as a lovely postscript — after calling L.L Bean the next morning to check their lost and found — I found my sweater on the floor of the back seat of our car.