Visible Turnings — Dawn and Dusk

Posted on December 28, 2009 by a moment with god — Leave a comment

sunset as seen from Mom's

Good Morning God! The sun hasn’t risen yet. I LOVE these visible transition times. And this morning I will be out walking as dawn arrives. Sunrise and sunset. Our earth is always turning — rotating– but at dawn and dusk we can SEE the turning.

Perhaps that is how birthdays are? An annual “dawn” as it were? A chance to record how we are THIS birthday and then to look back in photos and see the turning. Only, of course, as time goes on — it isn’t quite as much fun.

Just yesterday I saw a photo of OUR galaxy — we must be far enough away from the center to be able to take a photo of it. In fact, didn’t I read that our solar system is very well placed in the galaxy so that we are relatively undisturbed by dramatic galactic goings on? The “safe” placement is Your doing, I am sure! And THANK YOU!

Thank You too for setting us in TIME as well as SPACE. One of those gifts of Yours that I will appreciate more — later on. At the moment it’s a kind of “turning” that I don’t really like to consider. Ah, but, would I be sitting here, chatting with You if I was going to be HERE forever?

Death is a sort of Enforced Perspective. Making me realize that Perspective is another “gift” appreciated far more in hindsight. Hearing another person’s take on a situation also gives us the gift of perspective. Ah, do I hear YOU saying that You too can offer me perspective? And that my NOT KNOWING is the very best way to come into YOUR PRESENCE. So, here I am. Not knowing how best to love my very own family. The desire to say YES to every request — set against the vague understanding that I am not to stand in areas that are THEIRS.

Ah, YES! This NOT KNOWING goes on and on, doesn’t it. And I praise YOU for it! I am sure to mess up and make mistakes. Help me to LEARN so that at least I will move on to new mistakes. Vain Hope, You say? Just lighten up and realize that life is about loving and forgiving — not a scorecard of lessons mastered? No scorecard? REALLY? Is this good news — or bad news?

Hey, I’m sort of joining You in the laughter. . . well, smiling at myself, anyway. Yeah, I love You, too!

Posted in God's gifts, God's Time, humility, perspectives, visible turnings

The importance of parents

Posted on December 27, 2009 by a moment with god — Leave a comment

My Mom at her 93rd birthday

Good Morning, God! Today is my mom’s 95th birthday and I shall be calling her soon. And visiting soon after. Then we will have a small birthday party this evening. She’s a wonderful mother!

A good mother is important as You well know. I think of the story (true or not) about how a greeting card company offered to inmates in a jail free Mother’s Day cards and postage. It was a great success and almost every inmate made use of it. So, the company made the same offer at Father’s Day and got an almost zero response. The moral of that story? Do fathers fail us more often than mothers? Or is it that the jobs differ?

Mothers offer unconditional love. Fathers have the job of preparing the child for the world — standards and rules. Personally, I don’t like rules. And then there is the question of unfairness which comes up when rules are applied. Hard. I remember my father saying: Life IS HARD. Life isn’t supposed to be easy. I found in those words a helpful perspective.

I just read Roald Dahl’s book, Boy. In it he tells stories about life at an English boarding school. Talk about rules! And they were enforced by a sadistic set of teachers and headmasters. I thought as I read it that a lot of world problems were caused by such schools. Schools which plunge boys out of the world of mothers and into the world of men. . . and rules . . . cruelty begetting cruelty.

LIFE IS ABOUT BALANCING. Yes, God, it works best if there is a balance between love and standards. And I suppose that the balance needs to be adjusted for each individual and from moment to moment. TRUE You say.

We don’t do this very well, do we God. YES, You say, BUT YOU LEARN BY DOING AND YOU ARE DESIGNED TO LEARN FROM YOUR MISTAKES AND THE MISTAKES OF OTHERS — ALL THE BETTER TO PRACTICE FORGIVING AND ASKING FOR FORGIVENESS.

And we are also designed to LOVE — both mothers and fathers are designed to LOVE. Love AND Rules? Sigh. WITH YOUR HELP, GOD! WITH YOUR HELP!

Posted in Balancing and adjustments, Life is hard., Life isn't supposed to be easy., Mothers and Fathers

Cleaning up after myself

Posted on December 26, 2009 by a moment with god — Leave a comment

the day after Christmas

The House is Silent and Tidy! God, it is such a joy to wake up to a tidy and clean house, that I wonder why I don’t do it more often. This morning it is due to having friends over for Christmas dinner. That and starting and ending early enough so that we could actually get all the dishes done and tables cleaned before we went to bed.

Time and energy management! Now, help me to extract the lessons here and apply them to my body and my emotional body. TO MY WORLD? Hey, God, it is just me here. OK OK NOTHING IS IMPOSSIBLE TO YOU!

But, help me focus on my needs — like my need to understand WHY I don’t take better care of myself and my surroundings. DECISIONS! Yes, I turned my head and looked at the piles and the layer of scattered stuff and it is true. MOST of them are postponed decisions. And most of those are things I have not been willing to toss. OH! Another Hidden Fear! I’m AFRAID to toss and throw away! Afraid I might need them. THANK YOU! HELP ME FACE MY FEARS — face the fearful parts of myself.

Cleaning up the World does start with me. Ghandi said it best. We must become the change we wish to see. And, YES, I will need to ASK FOR HELP — and not just Your Help! You have designed us to need help, and to give help. Please, help me give over to YOU any sense that asking and seeking help is cheating!

Posted in accepting my need for help, asking for help for myself, becoming the change I wish to see, clean and tidy, decision making

Amazing Christmas

Posted on December 25, 2009 by a moment with god — Leave a comment

Merry Christmas, God. Not quite the right greeting, is it. It should be more AWE and WOW and THANK YOU! How absolutely AMAZING that You the Creator and Sustainer of the Universe should have entered our small world — entered into Time and Space — to give us a FACE to look upon. “If you have seen me, you have seen the Father.”

No wonder that so many people find it impossible or are not willing to believe that. It has such a specificity about it. THE NUMINOUS became FLESH? Sigh, especially that is difficult if people think all of this is just the flow of evolution — the complex flow of this and that. Not that You didn’t create and make use of this complex flow.

Now, I am just so thankful that I have been given the gift of belief — ah, You remind me of the days I walked across campus saying: I believe. Help Thou my disbelief. Hm. A thought. It does involve choices. The photo this morning is of Suz yesterday at the market, choosing an orange for bran muffins. I took that photo because the whole store was filled with people making choices for this special dinner for this special day. Perhaps You have even more compassion for those who look at this harsh and difficult world — filled with injustice — and judge You! People who say, if THIS is the best God can do — then I choose NO GOD!

Well, yes, You do remind me that I too was complaining about my species. Complaining that You had not done a good enough job in making us. Blaming you for “hardware” difficulties. And You made it clear that You have been IN THE PROCESS of creating us for a VERY VERY LONG TIME — and that we have reached the point where we are involved — HAVE GOT TO HELP — with this whole process of BECOMING. Becoming fully human? Or just becoming? NOT CLEAR YET, You say? No, more not explainable . . . . but it does involve our making choices.

You ARE the BEST GIFT, God. Even if You are BEYOND explanation. Even if there are more questions by far, than answers. Still, the visceral fact that YOU ARE and YOU LOVE and YOU CARE ABOUT EACH OF US — AND MORE than us — that nourishes me and gives me the hope to . . .
to molt? Or would it be more like a software upgrade? A SERIES of molts and upgrades? Help me to say and mean, THANK YOU!!!!

Posted in a series of molts and upgrades, accepting gifts sight unseen, God as an Ongoing Gift, God's gifts

A world alive with Light

Posted on December 24, 2009 by a moment with god — Leave a comment

Koko Crater in late December

The World is alive with Light and I am THANKFUL! Joyful, even, as Beauty does that — brings JOY with an intensity that almost hurts. And the world of man-made things pales in comparison. Funny, isn’t it, God. I mean You know I am a materialist in that I love the Material World. My iPod is charging to my right and an anthurium with new leaves and two flowers sits in a pot to my left. And I trudged around most of yesterday LOOKING for stuff to give.

But all of it piled up together is no match for the simple joys of bright blue skies and sunlight coming up from behind Koko Crater. You know, God, I see it all as a GIFT from Your Hand. And I see Your Hand as Loving — and Loving in a PERSONAL WAY. This brings me more JOY even than the LIGHT!

And I wish/pray for all of us to LOVE YOU and then TURN AND LOVE OUR NEIGHBOR AS WE LOVE OURSELVES. And understand that in this small blue dot we are ALL neighbors.

And, yes, God, we could begin with me. Please, help — please pour out even more love — and give us hearts turned right side up so we can received all that You give. All Your Love and Compassion and Interest in each and every one of us — humans — and our extended family of creation. Please.

Posted in asking for help for myself, beauty, JOY, Light, LOVE, Our Extended Family - all creatures great and small, our small blue dot

Changes over Time

Posted on December 23, 2009 by a moment with god — Leave a comment

I love the light at the end of the year. The December and January light is lower in the sky but the clouds are fewer and everything seems to glow. Thank You, God for LIGHT, and for SEASONS — even the barely perceptible seasons we have here.

Monday I was up at the end of Keeamoku St. and there was Tantalus with an amazingly white cloud behind it. I gasped. Your world is SO BEAUTIFUL. Thank You for the World and for giving us a sense of beauty.

Then yesterday I was reading about the fact that the Arctic sea ice will be gone — at least in the summer — rather soon. In fact, they aren’t sure just when because as the permafrost thaws more CO2 will be released causing an increase in the warming. As a person living on an island I really hope (ask YOU?) that this warming thing doesn’t happen too suddenly.

A seasonal change is a delight, but I am not eager for MAJOR change • CLIMATE CHANGE . . . but then, is anyone? Please, help me to care about my children and grandchildren’s world and not rest in the Not in My Lifetime view. . . Please!

Posted in climate changes, seasonal changes

On Moral Failures

Posted on December 22, 2009 by a moment with god — Leave a comment

Ah God, is there anything sadder than a Pastor who steps down due to “moral failure”? Tiger we understand. . . sort of . . . ministers? But here is an image of OUR INNER CAT — out in the cold looking for ? ? ? AND WE ALL HAVE AN INNER CAT!

Dr. Arch Hart spoke right to the HEART of the PROBLEM several years ago when he talked here in Honolulu about ANHEDONIA. The TOTAL ABSENCE OF PLEASURE. The way he explained it was that when we are TOO BUSY — yes, God, even TOO BUSY DOING YOUR WILL — that we slowly build a wall around our brain’s Pleasure Center. The wall eventually gets so high that simple pleasures can’t get in. I guess that would be like being out in the cold without warm clothes. ICE. COLD. NOTHINGNESS.

At that point, our inner cat, our inner pleasure seeking cat, goes out on the prowl. Pleasure seems so essential . . . and God, perhaps it is. Thus MORAL FAILURE.

Dr. Hart talked about a well known ministry leader who saw him thanks to his wife (and her threat to publicly blow him out of the water if he didn’t go). Dr. Hart said get out your calendar. CUT OUT HALF OF WHAT YOU ARE DOING! And, under duress, he did. One year later Dr. Hart got a thank you note from him. He talked about the simple joys he was now able to experience . . . now that he had CUT WAY BACK. So, God, I am not THAT busy.

BUT, DEAR HEART YOU ARE TOO BUSY!

Big sigh. Yes, God. Too busy. CUT BACK! I hear You. I hear YOU. Now help me enter into the needed humility to truly cut back. And the wisdom to know WHAT TO CUT AND HOW! Please!

Posted in busy, Moral Failures, Our inner Cat

Christmas Palms and Connections

Posted on December 22, 2009 by a moment with god — Leave a comment

Our Christmas Palm Tree

Good evening, God. You, of course, have already noticed my resourcefulness in creating a Christmas Tree when the stores had sold out. You might also have noticed that I didn’t plan ahead very well. Planning vs Creativity? Yes, we CAN have both. Indeed, I aspire to have both. Help me visualize what that would look like, please! No! It is NOT PIGGY to ask YOU for both of them . . . although I must confess I need to eat less and spend less . . . so piggy is not a bad word.

Before doing any asking, I want to do some THANKING! Thank You for the good visit with Sandy and Ian! Thank YOU that Ian is growing in his social skills and that he WANTED to go out for meals and talk with me. Thank You for daughters and grandsons! And, speaking of daughters, I am off to go to the airport to pickup Suzy. Please give us a good visit and give us a safe drive in the rain that woke me up as I napped.

Thank You for this YEAR of CELEBRATIONS and ANNIVERSARIES and SHARED TIME with FAMILIES and FRIENDS! Connections are where the JOY is. And maybe our connections here are lessons in how to connect with You?

Back from the airport with Suz — safe and sound — happy and tired. Thank You!

Posted in connections, daughters, Uncategorized

the Joy of Light

Posted on December 20, 2009 by a moment with god — Leave a comment

Ah, it is continuing to rain, God. Thank You! I love waking up to the sound of rain. And, when the sun breaks through there is the hope of rainbows. Yesterday was full of them — one just lying flat in our valley. And I am smiling at the memory. Actually, God, I love LIGHT! Light flowing through plants, light sparkling off water, light through the prism of raindrops — all ineffably wonderful.

So, this morning as we gathered to hear the old prophecies of Light Coming Into Darkness it coincided beautifully with the dark of our lengthening nights. And, as I sit here offering You a bit of my mind and time, the main point of this glorious season comes to me: Your Light is supposed to Flow through US! Shine forth from us! I think of the halos of saints . . . and I feel pretty opaque.

Sigh, I AM OPAQUE. But, I love Your LIGHT. And You don’t ever give up on us! And now, dropping down into what is known as reality — I would say that the essential point is just exactly that — YOU NEVER GIVE UP ON US. Your glorious (albeit very quiet) entry into History is all about YOU opening the WAY for us. And You do indeed, stand at the door of our hearts, knocking . . . wanting to enter in and together feast with us on all You have provided.

No wonder hurting, sorrowing, depressed people find this simply too good to be true. Ah, God, help us! Help us unbolt, unchain, and OPEN up our hearts to YOU! Reach out to us in music, in light — even on snow — in smiles and small acts of kindness. And help those of us who are opaque to ask You for transparency . . . or maybe that is just a by-product of the small acts of kindness and joy? Ahaaa. Let YOUR WILL in me, be ONGOING!

Thank You!

Posted in Light, Light shining through, on being opaque

standing in the Light

Posted on December 19, 2009 by a moment with god — 1 Comment

Good Morning, God! I’m just back from my Saturday morning trip to the Farmers’ Market — and I was taking photos on the way. We walked past a cactus garden and I took pictures of spine covered palms and barrel cactus and agaves and so forth. But, God, it was this plant that caught my eye. Why? Because it seemed so clear that its leaves were welcoming Your Light. They are broad and oriented toward the light.
Then I thought about the cacti . . . leaves? Do they HAVE leaves? Or is it only thorns?

Aaah, plants that HAVE WATER can afford to support leaves! Plants that have developed with very little water can’t afford leaves! In Arizona the Palo Verde trees have narrow leaves and the trunk itself is green in order to extract the most nourishment from the light.

And, perhaps water can symbolize love. People with a dependable source of love can afford to spread out tender leaves toward You and Your Light. But when water/love is scarce — people like plants — might think thorns are a better choice. Thorns to protect what they have. Hm. I have been blessed. Lots of water/love flowing through me. Gosh, God, blessed makes it sound like I deserve the blessing. Lucky?

And here is the REAL question, God. . . WHAT ABOUT THE UNLUCKY? What about the poor children of the world? Then I see the impoverished children of Swaziland — joyful at little things. Children carried on the backs of moms and sisters for years . . . children clearly loved . . . watered with love even when the water from the ground is polluted and unhealthy. So unlucky HOW? Poverty comes in many different forms, doesn’t it God.

And as for me, God? Maybe I need to appreciate that cacti are built to absorb a lot of LIGHT! They also make the very best use
of the water they get. Humph. And to think I have failed all these years to appreciate cacti. I was focused on the protective thorns. (You say that I have thorns, too? That we are designed to be able to protect ourselves?) I wasn’t impressed by the amount of light they could absorb and their clever use of water.

And now I am thinking about how You even things out. Harsh environments call forth resourcefulness. Sigh. In a society that adores EASY, resourcefulness and resiliency don’t get a whole lot of respect. . . or even noticed.

I’d ask to be more resilient . . . but I’m pretty sure I’d find the path . . . HARD.
And, now, God, a BIG SIGH! Please, help me to choose wisely. Even if it is HARD!
Thank You, God. Thank You for being TRUSTWORTHY!

Posted in adoring Easy, cacti, resiliency, resourcefulness, water and love