Rising in the Dark, Circadian Tides and Attention

Posted on December 31, 2010 by a moment with god — Leave a comment

Sunrise over Honolulu in August

Good Morning, God!

I am up at my regular time but it is still DARK! Several years ago I discovered that the sun rises later up until January 15th. This morning when I checked the chart I discovered that sunrise stays at 7:11 up until January 26 — when it rises at 7:10. Ten days longer? That seems odd, God.

But, then the 11 year sunspot cycle seems to have been a bit over 12 years. Hmmm. My mind is swinging back to Stonehenge and other ancient circles set up — in part — to note solstices and other astronomical cycles and events. And then forward to ponder our own biological cycles and rhythms.

Suz was telling me that Chinese medicine divides the 24 hour cycle up into two hour chunks by bodily system. Actually, even our western medicine has noted differing sensitivities to medicines based on time of day. We really ARE connected to the WIDER WORLD. I can’t remember just how many thousands of data points we receive each second. And what a small percentage we are “aware” of.

We really do seem limited to ONE object of focus at a time. Multitasking is just a rapid rotation of attention. Hmm. Why don’t we USE this, God! We CAN select what we focus on. But, it has to be a positive — our minds don’t do negatives. For example, focusing on BEING PATIENT is really more of a focus on DON’T FUSS — DON’T COMPLAIN. It would be more useful to focus on BE UNDERSTANDING. BE COMPASSIONATE! Please, help me with this, God!

Posted in being together in a compassionate presence, cyclical nature of the universe, time, web of life

A Breadfruit Tree and the New Year

Posted on December 30, 2010 by a moment with god — Leave a comment

Breadfruit tree at Ala Moana

Good Morning, God!

What could better symbolize NEW LIFE and FRUITFULNESS than a Breadfruit Tree! Yet how unexpected to find one at Ala Moana Shopping Center! But, there it was! And I was delighted!

Actually, looking back at it now, I find it encouraging! I feel as if it is a Personal Invitation to me — inviting me to grow and bear fruit — to step out of old confining roles and into the UNKNOWN. Well, WHY NOT?

These are GOOD thoughts to have on the eve of New Year’s Eve. Life is SUCH A RICH GIFT, God! We do not — well, I don’t — OPEN IT UP, to its full extent! Each morning we rise and are surrounded by all the gifts and blessings YOU desire to give us. Only we don’t see them. Or, more likely we see them in unappealing wrappings and pretend that they are not for US!

Ah yes, God, often Your gifts come in horrid wrappings. I can see why Growth Opportunities are given to us as unavoidable problems because the truth is WE LIKE THE FAMILIAR! Animals get used to cages and often do not wish to step outside them. It is like the old Irish proverb, “Better the devil you know, than the devil you don’t know.”

So, here we are with WHAT IS. And we [family and friends and fellow citizens] are invited to OPEN IT. To TRUST YOU in it and with it. To invite YOU to USE IT for our “long term” growth — as in “eternal” growth? TRUSTING YOU, GOD, to stir us up and help us put out New Leaves — and bear Fruit. Aaaah. Thank YOU!

Posted in gifts and giftings, Growth Opportunities, Trusting God

A Trip Back in Time

Posted on December 29, 2010 by a moment with god — Leave a comment

Between buildings in Chinatown

Good Morning, God!

Yesterday, Suz and I went to Chinatown. We had just parked and were looking for the restaurant The Green Door to have lunch when Suz said, “Take a photo, Mom.” We both LOVED the colors of the brooms. Brooms were never these colors a decade ago. But, aside from that, going to Chinatown is like stepping back in Time. The buildings were old — maybe two stories tops — and the feel is one of small shopkeepers and business owners.

Suz told me Chinatown is like Paris in that regard — lots of local shops — not many signs of global brands and conglomerates. Ah, God, we are WALLMARTING the WORLD. It doesn’t feel right. It doesn’t feel good. And for WHAT? Cheaper prices? I look around me at the heaps on my desk — think of the piles on my dresser — and conclude that I don’t need cheaper or more.

Of course, I COULD refrain. I could stay out of shops. I could be content with what I have. Sigh. There is something about shopping that brings out the female root-and-berry gathering instincts. Shifting through stuff looking for the wearable (read: edible) is very satisfying. Maybe men get that deep atavistic satisfaction from fishing or hunting? Or is that what sports does? Shopping for the women. Sports for the men. Hmmm.

I think, God, that we need BETTER outlets for our deep instinctive wiring. Better activities, and maybe better jobs? Meanwhile it was fun to poke around and explore another world — a world of very small businesses and hard workers.

I wonder, God, what will our FUTURE look like?

Posted in meaningful work, time

The Greening of the Earth and ME

Posted on December 28, 2010 by a moment with god — Leave a comment

Koko Head, green from the rains

Good Morning, God!

I am curled up in bed enjoying a SLOW morning. My Mother’s 96th Birthday lunch in her apartment went well. We brought in food, she opened presents and we played scrabble. Oh! Then we found the lovely flowers sent by my brother and Barba and took them back up to her. Beautiful!

My office is still jumbled, God. Well, actually, pretty much the whole house has an unkempt look — the part of me that PUTS STUFF AWAY has been otherwise occupied. I went on a long walk with Suz yesterday and realized that my own interior “house” needs a lot of stuff put away — or tossed out. Friends, daughters, therapists — people who hear us into hearing ourselves — are such a GIFT!

Rueful laugh. Aaah, but it takes me so LONG to hear what is going on inside of me. Or maybe it is just that the tides of change move along, but I only notice from time to time? And, YOU just pointed out, that even after I “notice” it takes time for me to integrate changes into my daily living patterns.

Old patterns of speaking and thinking are HARD to CHANGE. They are hard to DUMP — which is mostly what I would like to do with many of mine. The detritus of hundreds of years of “family” cultures — contaminating my words and actions. YUCK!

And so, God, BECOMING a NEW CREATURE in CHRIST is a difficult on-going challenge. Please, send Your Spirit of Compassion to wash through me — removing old “don’ts” and “do’s” from my behavior patterns. Help me in Extending to Myself the interest and attention I love to give to others!

It is scary for an extrovert to venture INSIDE and I need YOUR HELP!

Posted in a series of molts and upgrades, being together in a compassionate presence, changing who I want to become, choosing HARD, Expand my Heart, hearing myself

The HUNT for Mom’s Around-the-World Travel Diary

Posted on December 27, 2010 by a moment with god — Leave a comment

My office AFTER the hunt

Good Morning, God!

For some time — years — my Mom has thought that I had her travel diary. I had looked. And LOOKED. But, I couldn’t find it. However, on Christmas, our daughter, Suzanne, became aware of Mom’s distress at not having her diary of her 1983-4 Trip Around the World. So, yesterday, the HUNT began.

I looked where I had looked before. Then I looked behind boxes and bookcases. I emptied out my literature sorters — slots to randomly stuff stuff into. Suz pulled back another bookcase and crawled behind my rolling file cabinets and looked through folder after folder of photos. NO TRAVEL DIARY! I would have given up but Suz has TENACITY enough for two!

The day wore on and it was past time to visit Mom. I was taking back some laundry I had decide to wash for her. When we got to Mom’s I hung up her blouses and I gave Suz a pile of underwear to put in the lingerie drawer. I heard a cry — an excited SHOUT — THERE WAS THE DIARY! As Suz said, “Of course, women put important items in their lingerie drawer!” What a relief! Truly, God, it is a load off of my shoulders. My Mom LOVES to reread her travel diaries. And I am so happy for her!

I told Mom I was going to take photos of my devastated office — to show her how HARD we had looked. But, now that I think about it — YOU get the credit. I hardly ever wash my Mom’s clothes — certainly not when Suz is here to put them away and be primed to SEE the diary! THANK YOU!!!!

Posted in family visits, gifts and giftings, tenacity

A Silent Morning — A Thankful Morning

Posted on December 26, 2010 by a moment with god — Leave a comment

The two of us on Christmas Day

Good Morning, God!

Thank YOU for a lovely DAY, yesterday — a day which was mostly about preparing to welcome into our home our “Family of Friends.” I had such a good time preparing that I am sure it must have been YOU — helping me. And it all seemed so analogous to cleaning up my Heart to Welcome You in. Indeed, God, YOU came in with our friends!

I don’t know why I should be so surprised by that. I John 4:20 asks us: How can you say you love God, whom you have NOT seen, when you do not love your brother whom you HAVE seen. Loving You and loving our family and friends are all of a piece.

Oh dear! YOU remind me that we are commanded to love our enemies, too, perhaps, even MORE! Blessing — instead of judging. Praying for — instead of against. So, God, bless all of us who believe in bombs and violence — even the violence of a raised voice. And, yes, God, that is sometimes me. Argh!

But, back to this morning, I was the first one awake. I made the coffee and took it into Kit. Then I brought in my laptop and we reviewed the photos of 2010 — and agreed on some for our year-end letter. It was a FULL year. A marvelous year. And my HEART is SO THANKFUL. And Gratitude seems to WANT to share. So then, Dear God, thank you for 2010 and help me continue to make ROOM for You in 2011.

Posted in being together in a compassionate presence, connections, Expand my Heart, gratitude, LOVE, thankfulness

Mele Kalikimaka

Posted on December 25, 2010 by a moment with god — Leave a comment

Christmas lights in downtown Honolulu

Good Morning, God!

MERRY CHRISTMAS! Thank YOU for coming IN PERSON over 2,000 years ago! Thank YOU for COMING NOW into our Hearts and Lives — bringing LOVE and casting out FEAR.

The photo is of the downtown Honolulu lights and people strolling along gazing at them. Our lights and gifts are such small imitations of YOUR LIGHT and YOUR GIFT.

No wonder they don’t really satisfy and leave us lacking. The depression so many people feel at Christmas is the yearning for YOU.

Ah, YES, even those of us who go to church and pray and believe — STILL YEARN FOR YOU! And that is GOOD! It is good that we should know that we are “incomplete” and “needy.” And that is why we so need to come together and love one another. Loving each other AS WE ARE — SEEING that each of us has a CORE WHICH YEARNS FOR YOU — aaah, THAT IS TRULY THE BEST OF GIFTS.

How better to make more room for YOU than by loving one another!

Posted in being together in a compassionate presence, gifts and giftings, God's gifts, Help me to see

Families — God’s Favorite Forge

Posted on December 24, 2010 by a moment with god — Leave a comment

Our Christmas Tree, the night before Christmas eve

Good Morning, God!

I have a wonderful family! But, we are NOT a PERFECT family. Mostly, I don’t mind that. But last night a “dinner table” incident plunged me into what felt like “terminal sorrow” — at least that is how I described it when I resumed speaking. Terminal Sorrow, Yikes! But, God, that is how it felt at the time.

I felt so bad I actually took a walk around the block. As You know, on the walk I was back on my favorite complaint of WHY DIDN’T YOU DO A BETTER JOB OF CREATING US! At least that is what it boiled down to. Sigh. For all of my intentions of taking personal responsibility for myself — I so often lapse into blaming YOU! I’m sorry, God! I am only an “intermittent grownup.”

One thought that repeated itself was the AA one of “I am powerless over this problem” and I need to hand it over to GOD — even if God won’t do what I want. Yes, God, you noticed that snarky postscript. But, really, in my saner moments I understand that it is a good thing You don’t do MY will.

Returning home I discovered my SORROW had looked a lot like ANGER. Hmm. It might have been wrapped in a bit of anger — but it WAS sorrow. Meanwhile, things had been patched up and steps toward growth and understanding had been taken. All that remained was to bring me back into “equilibrium.” Sigh.

Christmas is about YOUR COMING and YOUR LOVE for us just as we ARE. You love me at my most judgmental worst. And, amazingly, You help my family to love me too. You even help ME to love myself. Ah, NOW THAT IS THE SPIRIT OF CHRISTMAS! THANK YOU!

Posted in being together in a compassionate presence, Expand my Heart, family visits, Forgiven!, Forgiving, LOVE, Perspective

Full Moon, Full Heart, and Hearing as Healing

Posted on December 23, 2010 by a moment with god — Leave a comment

Winter Solstice Full Moon a day later

Good Morning, God!

Winter Solstice — Christmas — the Coming of the Light — aaah YES! You have not left us in darkness. You HAVE COME and YOU DO COME to Hearts who have made room for You.

I’m pondering the phrase Room for You. This photo was taken outside the Rewick Board Room at Central Union Church. That is where our Women’s Wednesday 7:00 a.m. Prayer Group meets. It is where we gather to “make room for You.” The GATHERING is important. We don’t just make room for You, God, we make ROOM for ONE ANOTHER! Hearing and being heard — we share Your Presence.

Hmmm. It comes to me that HEARING one another is a SACRED ACT. Interested, Caring, Focused Attention invites the Heart to Open and Speak. Ah! AND THAT IS HEALING! I say that as if I were surprised, God. And, I AM SURPRISED! Such unexpected power in such an “ordinary” activity!

Only, of course, that kind of listening is far from ordinary. I am blessed to have friends who HEAR me. I’m blessed to have Kit hearing and speaking with me. Blessed to pray (read: hear each other in Your Presence) with people.

One more thought, God, before I go walking around the block. Walking and talking — as I normally do each Thursday morning — seems to activate more of the mind. Or, perhaps it just activates slightly different parts? But the quality of the conversation seems somewhat deeper on a walk. Prayer comes in many forms, doesn’t it, God!

Posted in healing, Hearing, hearing myself, letting the Holy Spirit flow through us, listening, Prayer

Deer Asking for Help

Posted on December 22, 2010 by a moment with god — Leave a comment

two of four young Sitka deer swimming toward help

Good Morning, God!

Four young Sitka black-tailed deer swimming toward help — that’s quite a story! They were in the icy water of Stephen’s Passage, Alaska — who knows for how long — when they saw a boat and swam right toward it. They circled around LOOKING at the people on the boat. Thankfully, God, the people got the “message” and helped the deer on to the boat.

deer on the boat

There they stayed, shivering and wet, until they docked at Taku Harbor. Then the first deer lept into the water, swam to shore and raced into the forest. The next two needed a little help to leave the ship, and the fourth one has to be taken down the dock in a wheel barrel! But, all made it “home.”

I love stories of interspecies contact, God! We are together in this miraculous Web of Life — connected in ways we have not yet comprehended. Sharing a life with a dog or cat gives us some small sense of this here on Planet Earth.

But, I believe You are inviting us to Sing with the Morning Stars. To JOIN in the Heavenly Chorus! To be in TUNE!

Ah! NOW THERE is interspecies contact! Thank YOU, God, for creating SUCH A RICH AND COMPLEX UNIVERSE and for giving us a part of it.

Posted in a hand up, accepting my need for help, asking for help for myself, interspecies contact, Thanksgiving!, web of life