Good Morning, God
Good Friday — I wanted something black as a photo — and I looked and looked.
This photo — filled with galaxies — seems perfect. I tend to get “sea sick” when I contemplate looking back at close to the beginning of our cosmos. My Mind can’t handle it.
My mind / heart has a hard time with Good Friday, too.
I have to try to “reduce it” to get it to fit into words. It is MYSTERY. It is beyond me. But even the events we know about (assuming there was a lot more going on cosmically speaking) are powerful. You COME to OPEN a WAY for us to CONNECT with YOU.
You do not do it INTELLECTUALLY — it is so symbolic that Jesus chose not to speak — You did it PHYSICALLY — Jesus — beaten, spat upon, crucified — for me.
Knowing it was FOR ME — is so different than knowing it was for US. I got the FOR US. It was the FOR ME that took me longer — a lot longer. Perhaps it was being raised an Episcopalian? We repeated a general confession weekly and received forgiveness. But SIN wasn’t a big thing for us — like it was for Baptists. It took time for me to become aware of my innate inadequacy. And that happened only when I read in Romans that sin could be defined as “Missing the Mark”. That I did!
Back to Good Friday — Jesus said it would have been better for Judas had he not been born — but God, I keep thinking that when Jesus said “Forgive them Father, for they know not what they do” that he might have been thinking of Judas, too. I hope so. I find Judas distressingly human — after all that time with Jesus — he didn’t understand You. He wanted You to do his will. But, then I so often want YOU to do what I want. Please help me.