Lightening over Tucson

Posted on July 21, 2012 by a moment with god — Leave a comment

Approaching rain cloud

Good Day, God!

Kit and I are here in Tucson — here with daughter Sandy’s family — here in monsoon season. This particular cloud moved over us with just a light rain. Ah, but at dinner we dined outside on the covered lanai with lightening and rolling thunder.

There is something quite magical about lightening, God. Only magic is a term that implies human “control” over the Forces of Nature. That desire for control seems built into our DNA, God.

Don’t our children “take” to stories of wizards and witches and extrasensory perceptions? More to the point, God, haven’t our adults created bombs that far exceed the brightness and power of lightening?

Hmm. Part of me cries out This Way Lies Madness. Well, it was madness! And now we are no longer setting off experimental hydrogen bombs over Pacific. Talk about birds fouling their own nests! Yikes!

My mother was raised on Science Fiction, God. Last week, as we were coming home from her ear doctor, she turned to me and said, “Freeways were science fiction when I was growing up. Only the illustrations only showed one or two cars on them.” We were just entering a congested freeway as she spoke.

I suppose, God, her comment points out the unexpected aspects surrounding the “future.” Yes, we have these gleaming sweeping freeways — but they are clogged with cars. Older adults — could one say, “grownups? — have observed enough “unintended consequences” to be slightly uneasy at our rush toward “progress.”

My book group and I were discussing the Hick boson which was recently “seen” at the super collider at CERN. Although none of are “luddites” there was still some rueful laughing at the possible or probable “unintended consequences” of expending so much power in wanting to know still more of what the universe is made of.

I sure hope You are watching out for us, God! We need You!

Tagged with: CERN, Hicks boson, pushing toward the Future, unintended consequences
Posted in Curiosity, Energy, Heavens declare the Glory of God, Humility or Needing Help!, web of life

Getting Ready to Go

Posted on July 16, 2012 by a moment with god — 1 Comment

flowers of the paperbark tree

Good Day, God!

I have been busy — working hard at cleaning the back of closets for our carpets to be cleaned — and then this morning cleaning out piles and files from years ago. I have a big garbage bag full of trash. And a box of paper to recycle.

And I’ve been busy getting ready to go on yet another trip — this time with Kit — as we go to celebrate his brother’s 80th birthday.

80 is a big marker, God. I have several years to go but, I am beginning to “feel” older. Up until now my attitude has been to ignore aging. That is still my attitude. But, I notice that my training jogs are filled with more photo opportunities. Sigh.

And I have also noticed the high price of “not knowing” and “not doing.” Today I did something that I have been refusing to think about. I filled out paperwork to try and make sure that my mother — who I am trusting has years left — won’t be resuscitated. That sounds awful, God. But, the electric shock used in resuscitation is almost guaranteed to crush ribs. Oh! How have we gotten to this horrible state where a Natural Death is not the norm? Lawsuits I guess.

The paperwork involved a POLST form with a doctor’s signature. And tomorrow I have to post it. Kit questioned the need for it saying that surely everyone would know better. But, I pointed out some children might sue if every step wasn’t taken. This child would not sue. But, she sure didn’t want to make that decision.

Sigh. Now that I have faced my duty I am feeling better. I takes a lot of energy to surpress stuff. Please, God, help me grow up.

Tagged with: Allowing a Natural Death, hard decisions, POLST forms, Refusing Resuscitation
Posted in busy, Caring, growing toward up, responsibility

A Matter of Focus

Posted on July 14, 2012 by a moment with god — Leave a comment

A lotus flower at the KCC Farmers’ Market

Good Day, God!

Wow! Lotus flowers are right up there with water lilies for luminescent beauty. Thank You for glorious flowers and for eyes to see. After listening this morning to Jeffrey M. Schwartz’s book, The Mind and the Brain, I appreciate our eyes even more. He was describing the layering of neurons that go into creating the retina. I couldn’t begin to repeat all the steps — it was more than enough to hear them listed.

We are Fearfully and Wonderfully Made! Thank You!

Of course, I do realize that we humans only see a small percentage of the electromagnetic spectrum. And, some small, ungrateful part of me is wistfully wishing I could see even more colors.

More . . . the yearning for MORE does get us in trouble, doesn’t it, God. I have no trouble believing that the story of Eve in the Garden of Eden is fundamentally accurate. ALL OF THIS you may have to eat. Just don’t eat of the tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil.

Sigh. What would my attention be fixated on? The ONE thing I couldn’t have.

One might think, God, that knowing that about myself would enable me to could change my focus? Hmm, sometimes I can change my focus — gather up my thoughts and direct them toward something positive. But, that takes energy. Actually, it takes that hardest of all things to do — Taking Care of Myself.

Like most of us I am inclined to confuse “taking care” of myself with “indulging” myself. Alas, what I need is less indulgence and more “taking myself in hand,” kindly but firmly.

So off I went after dinner tonight for a jog around the block. A bit over 8 tenths of a mile — enough to make me sweat. Sigh. Please, God I need Your Help!

Tagged with: focus, indulgence, self-care
Posted in choices, Compassion, health

Living in the Light of Love

Posted on July 11, 2012 by a moment with god — Leave a comment

split leaf philodendron in the morning light

Good Night, God!

Oh, if only we could see people, circumstances and our world in the light of Your Compassionate Love! I guess my prayer, God, is that our eyes and our hearts would be opened.

A friend confided in me this evening that if she had lots and lots of money she would set up a broadcasting station (or network like Ted Turner’s?) that just broadcast Good News.

Stories of real people doing good things, helping others, surmounting great odds, etc. I love that idea, God! Why hasn’t some billionaire thought of that? We humans need to be encouraged. Need to have our Hope built up.

I know the theologians talk about the Doctrine of Original Sin. And, it is true that we have to be taught not to grab the biggest piece of cake. Still, I kind of like to think of us as basically good — unless we have been damaged or had our growth stunted by lack of love. Frankly, I think most people do better than might be expected given their past. I think that’s You, helping us, God.

Maybe, God, it isn’t just having our eyes opened. Maybe it goes back to not holding on so tightly to so many Rights and Wrongs. Or maybe it is being aware of how many things pass through our visual field. We really don’t see much if we aren’t looking for it — or expecting it. Maybe, God, we could just realize that nothing is ever really easy. And that we all fail or as Saint Paul said, “Fall short of the Glory of God.”

Well, God, those are good words to go and fall asleep on. Please keep on keeping on working in me.

Tagged with: letting go of being Right, nothing is ever really easy, open eyes open heart
Posted in being together in a compassionate presence, Compassion, Light, Light shining through, LOVE

Lighting the Night . . . Waves of Change

Posted on July 10, 2012 by a moment with god — 1 Comment

Photo: Michael Rosenfeld/Getty illustrating “Night Owls” in the Atlantic

Good Night, God!

And it is night here in Honolulu. I just finished reading the article “Night Owls” in the current Atlantic. It was sent to me by a friend who is a bit of a Night Owl herself.

It’s a brief look at Evening’s Empire: A History of the Night in Early Modern Europe by Craig Koslofsky. I knew that the rich and privileged in the 1800s “danced” the night away. But, that was a fact imbedded in novels. I didn’t see it in its historical context.

I thought that the extension of the Day far into the Night began with Edison and the electric light bulb! Electricity did make night-time available to the lower end of the economic and social spectrum. But the transformation was well under way much earlier. Then, In the 1600’s, coffee, tea and chocolate came along to help turn people into Night Creatures.

Sunrise over Tucson: Photo by Mark Bramhill

Koslofsky talks about the intellectual and societal changes that came about with well lit public places — like cafes and coffee shops — which were open to ordinary folk. It was a revolution. More to the point it was a revolution that opened the doors to all kinds of Revolutions. People gathering together to talk and think can have a “tinder-like” quality.

Now we have added the iPhone connector and the Facebook connector. I think of the revolutions were in Egypt and Libya, where these connectors played pivotal roles.

But, what about Connecting to You? And to our inner self? That takes Time. Time alone. This week, up at St. Anthony’s Retreat Center, people are gathered to be Alone with You. Alone Together. They are at a Centering Prayer Retreat.

Centering with others, in Silence, is for me the best way to Hear You. It is a sort of “tinder.” And the time of day doesn’t matter.

Thank You, God, for opportunities like these.

Tagged with: Connecting, Evening's Empire: A History of the Night in Early Modern Europe, Night Owls, pushing the Day into the Night
Posted in Centering Prayer, Changing, relationships

Reaching out to Touch — Reaching for Healing

Posted on July 8, 2012 by a moment with god — Leave a comment

shower tree blossoms at KCC

Good Day, God!

We are fragile creatures, God, like these blossoms. And like the blossoms, we don’t last very long — at least not in our Earthly Tents. Sigh.

I suppose, God, those two observations might be viewed as a complaint. And, I am certain that part of me is complaining — wailing and kvetching. That is the unwelcomed part of me that understands Job’s wife when she tells him (repeatedly?) to “curse God and die.” Like, just get it over with!

This morning, You held that squirming angry part of me in Your Lap as I listened to a friend give the sermon at church. Laura, gently and wryly, told us about her experience in self-medicating with alcohol to damp down the pain and shame of childhood abuse.

Her real subject was her healing — the healing that comes from “touching the hem of Jesus’ garment.” She talked of the healing of the memories and how You, God, had absorbed much of what had been intended for her. I could feel then — can feel now — how You weep over us.

Imagine those old theologians insisting that You were “above” emotions! — so much “higher” that You didn’t “feel?” What utter foolishness . . . and worse.

Laura entwined her story with the story from Luke 8:43-48 of the woman suffering from the issue of blood for 12 long years. Her bleeding, her menstruation, made her unclean. Unclean for 12 years! And anyone or anything she touched became unclean. Yikes!

How like her we are. Feeling unclean. Feeling that even talking about how we feel would make others unclean. Might make YOU unclean? Might make past “nightmares” real?

You long to heal us. And, is there anyone of us that doesn’t need healing? Repeated Healing! Ah, Healing is a Lifetime Work, God. Thank You for keeping on and on with Your Healing and Loving.

Tagged with: alcohol, being unclean, child abuse, pain, the woman with the issue of blood
Posted in healing, LOVE

In the middle of the Sacramento Valley — Mountains

Posted on July 6, 2012 by a moment with god — Leave a comment

Sutter Buttes: photo from Wikipedia

Good Day, God!

While my brother, Dave, was driving me back to the Sacramento airport, he pointed out “The Worlds’ Shortest Mountain Range” — the Sutter Buttes.

They were way off in the distance and there wasn’t time (or inclination) for a drive-by. But, I was taken with the idea that there was a ten mile long mountain range in the middle of the huge and FLAT Sacramento Valley. The valley is so flat that before California built the massive flood control and aqueduct system, the annual snow melt from the Sierras turned the central valleys into an inland sea.

I was really curious, God, about how the Sutter Buttes got there. A quick check on Google showed that is was the product of volcanic action 1.6-1.4 million years ago. 200,000 years of volcanic activity — ten miles of buttes that are up to 5,000 feet high — and then nothing more?

The stopping is almost as surprising at the starting. And, it is tickling something inside me. Do I also have unexpected volcanos in my life?

Well, yes. Our daughter Patty’s illness and death from cancer would be analogous to an unexpected volcano in a very flat land. And, I suspect, God, that most of us have events that come suddenly and traumatically into our lives.

The indigenous peoples of early California made the mountains part of their Creation Stories. Events like unexpected mountain ranges or unexpected illnesses do cry out for explanations, God.

Ah, yes. We humans seem designed to look for Explanations. And if not explanations then at least ways to integrate them into our Meaning Maps. I guess, God, my Map factors in randomness. Volcanos happen. Illnesses happen. And maybe they both have parts to play in Creation Stories — Geologic and Individual.

Thank You, God, for creating us!

Tagged with: Meaning Maps, Randomness, Sacramento Valley, Surprises, Sutter Buttes
Posted in Creating

A Visit to My Brother

Posted on July 5, 2012 by a moment with god — Leave a comment

A Ponderosa Pine at my brother’s home

Good Day, God!

My brother, Dave and his wife Barba retired years ago to Grass Valley in California’s Gold Rush country. The Ponderosa pines were part of why Dave selected the area. As he said, who expected “Grass Valley” to be full of ponderosa pines? Pine trees, blackberry bushes, and right in the center of their property is a Pond. It would be a winter pond except that Dave had it “improved” by sealing its bottom and pumping well water into it all during the summer.

The pond is home to water lilies, frogs, assorted fish and visiting Wood Ducks. Dave has built nesting boxes for the ducks. The entrance is so small I couldn’t believe they could get in. Dave explained that the instructions for the nest box were very precise. Too big a hole would let raccoons get their egg-stealing little hands in!

Wood ducks are the most beautiful of all ducks but the nesting season was over and the birds had flown off. Their ducklings had been protected from hawks and other predators by a pair of Redwing Blackbirds. The Blackbirds were such good parents that all the baby birds around them benefited.

My brother has created a lovely oasis. Barba has created beautiful gardens filled with flowers and herbs.

Caring is a wonderful thing, God. Whether it is a pair of Redwing Blackbirds protecting baby birds from Hawks — or Dave and Barba tending their little Eden. Caring for Your World, God, is such a good thing to do.

Tagged with: Gold Rush Country, Ponds, wood ducks
Posted in Caring, Creating, family visits, web of life

The Rockets Red Glare over Maunalua Bay

Posted on July 4, 2012 by a moment with god — Leave a comment

4th of July fireworks on Maunalua Bay

Good Day, God!

Watching the 4th of July fireworks overlooking the marina in Hawaii Kai — such a treat!

Earlier today, my husband Kit suggested that we go to watch the fireworks display. I am not yet home 24 hours so although I was willing, I was not eager.

Still, off we went to get a bite to eat at Panda Express and then figure out where we should station ourselves to see the display.

As soon as we drove into the Costco lot we saw LOTS of people — carrying chairs and coolers — walking toward the marina. Hmm. It seems we had stumbled onto a good place! We got our food and went around the corner to a far table with a view of the bridge going over the entrance to the marina. We ate and chatted and I took photos of the pre-display.

Being part of this informal group — gathered to celebrate Our Country’s birthday — felt good. It is good to be connected with one another. And, of course, it was truly wonderful that the explosions were fireworks and not aerial bombardments.

Thank You, God, for Peace!

Please help us to value peace more highly — understanding that daily we weave our strands into its complex fabric.

Tagged with: 4th of July fireworks, fireworks and bombardments, peace, the Value of Peace
Posted in Celebrations, connections, Peace

Being Heard into Speaking

Posted on June 27, 2012 by a moment with god — Leave a comment

flowers seen on a neighborhood walk

Good Day, God!

Thank You for a relaxing day — what a surprise and delight! I was quite sure yesterday that I had stuffed too many things into today. Still, being me, I couldn’t bear to drop anything.

But, all day there has been more than enough time — Time Between — Time as a Support.

I have never ever thought of TIME as supporting me. Now that the idea has entered my mind it seems so obvious.

Racing against the clock isn’t from You! We created the clock and made it a god over us. I was trying to figure out just why today had more than enough time.

I did start the morning with the Wednesday Morning Women’s Prayer group. That helps. Then too, one of my morning’s activities was going up Tantalus to see June, my Spiritual Director. That really helped. Oh my! There are so many Feelings in this one small heart, God! And what a gift it is to have a trusted friend hear me into speaking!

So many of those tangled and entangling feelings and half-formed thoughts wiggled their way out into Consciousness — into My Consciousness as I heard myself speaking. Speaking words out loud is so different from just thinking and different from writing, too. Maybe that is more true for extroverts than for introverts. I don’t know.

I just know that it takes a lot of energy not to hear myself.

Tagged with: Being Heard, sorting out a tangle of feelings, Spiritual Directors, Time as Support
Posted in being heard into speaking, being together in a compassionate presence