Set FREE from Learned Helplessness

An Allamanda blossom

An Allamanda ca blossom

Good Day, God!

How wonderful it is that You want us to talk with You! I never fail to forget that I cannot earn your love . . . that Your love already embraces me. And not just me — but all of us.

No doubt that statement would be or IS judged theologically incorrect. But, I agree with the Right Rev. Desmond Tutu — that You seem to have remarkably low standards. Look at the folks Jesus hung out with . . . a terrible bunch of sinners. Ah my. I am one, too. As Saint Paul pointed out — ALL have sinned and fallen short of the Glory of God!

But, on to one of the things I wanted to thank You for!

A few weeks ago I was given an example of what Martin Seligman calls Learned Helplessness. After a day or two after this awareness, it came to me that I, TOO, was suffering from Learned Helplessness. (Most likely all of us humans suffer from it in one form or another.)

Once this realization — that I, too, suffered from Learned Helplessness — permeated my heart, I felt as if I had been set free! And I was free! All sorts of things that had been “pending” in my life began to get done. Or should I say that I began to do them. It was an amazing week, in which things got bought, a handiman was found, and things got done.

So, God, I’m wondering about this phenomenon. A friend said . . . sounds like you were just suffering from procrastination. I said well, I called it procrastination for years and nothing happened — but when I called it learned helplessness — a lot began to happen.

I’m feeling that there remains more to learn about this — a lot more to discover about culturally imposed limits and unconscious restraints! But, right now, I just want to say: Thank You!

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Posted in connecting, freedom, gratitude, growing toward up, hope, letting the Holy Spirit flow through us, LOVE, Options, thankfulness, Thanksgiving!

Listening and Walking

A Hau Tree arbored walkway near San Souci Beach

A Hau Tree arbored walkway near Sans Souci Beach

Good Afternoon God.

Friday was my first day swimming in quite a while. The water was warm . . . the day was hot. But walking in the shade of the walkway made me forget the heat.

As I look at it, I think of the Pathway of Life. And I feel so fortunate and so thankful. Yes, God, I do remember the Bible verse from my childhood in Episcopal churches. Those to whom much has been given, from them much is required. (Luke 12:4)

I’ve always thought of it as reminding me that privilege or well-being brings responsibilities . . . and the more one has in talent or talents of gold . . . the more obligations one has.

Giving money to the Church and Charities is one obligation. Clearly there are others — but, I’ve never been helped to find them.

Hmm. That seems, odd, God! Surely at some point people ought to be helped to discover and employ their gifts!

I’m sitting here thinking about what talents I have and how they might be used. I got a “listening gene” from my mom and I do really enjoy listening to people. If I do it with love . . . without judgment . . . then I guess that would be using it as I should.

I know of churches that give “Spiritual Gifts” diagnostic tests and then use them to help folks find ways to use those gifts. Actually, my church has just hired a new minister who is skilled at doing just that! So, God, maybe I will become more aware — and better able to give back to my fellow humans. That would be excellent.

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Posted in connecting

Venus and Jupiter — Together in Our Sky

Venus and Jupiter together

Good Evening, God!

Last night my wonderful husband Kit and I went to The Shack on Koko Marina to have dinner and watch the moon rise. We normally do this the night BEFORE the Full Moon.We would have to stay up too late if we came for the Full Moon.

Sitting outside — enjoying the day changing from Day to Night  — is restorative. Toss in a 98% full moon and what could be better? Aah, what WAS better was seeing Venus and Jupiter so close together in our evening sky!  I checked and Jupiter had risen one minute before Venus. WOW!

Kit had heard on the news about this planetary proximity — but for me it was an unexpected delight. We just happened to look up as we were leaving the restaurant — and saw it!

Unexpected delights do seem to require that we LOOK . . . that we Observe . . . that we are Open to our surroundings. I guess that can be called Mindfulness or being in The Present.

And, as I am growing to “expect,” God, this morning my Spiritual Director June handed me an internet posting from Father Keating entitled “Notes From A Deep Conversation.” Fr. Keating is talking about Centering Prayer when he says at the beginning: “Without thinking or feeling some emotion there is just awareness. Then he goes on to say, “Somehow at the bottom of emptiness (openness, pure awareness) there is enjoyment, fullness, presence and peace.” He ends by saying, “The present moment contains all we need to be happy.”

I’m smiling, God. I suspect this is true because — as we learn to clear away the pains of the past and the fears of the future — we make ROOM for YOU, right HERE in the moment.

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Posted in connecting

FOOD Inc. — Can we live on this?

FOOD, Inc. A DVD about CHANGE that needs to happen.

FOOD, Inc. A DVD about CHANGE that needs to happen.

Good Evening, God!

Never again . . . that’s how I feel now, God, after watching the DVD FOOD, Inc. Never again do I want to eat meat in restaurants or anywhere else. We had already switched to mostly grass fed meat for me and wild fish for Kit. But after seeing this DVD I plan on eating a lot less protein and making sure it is GRASS FED or WILD FISH. 

Most of the facts weren’t new to me. BUT I had them located in assorted compartments in my mind. Seeing this DVD brought them all together AT ONE TIME and the impact is appalling!

Grains are government supported and thus sold to the food companies below what it costs to produce them. Because of this we can buy processed food for much less than real food. Of course, another reason is that REAL food will spoil. The microbes love it. But processed food will almost never be eaten by microbes. And that includes our own internal microbial helpers who often have to deal with non-food.

What I didn’t know is that we can be sued for telling the truth about food products . . . some sort of Veggie Law. . . gosh, God, they sued Oprah for talking about the feed lot beef. Yikes! Oprah won. Most folks can’t afford to fight.

Kit and I are fortunate, God. We have the ability to make healthy choices. But what about all the low paid workers who can’t afford healthy choices? What about the folks who haven’t seen this DVD? What about folks who depend on others for their meals?

Still, I sure do wish everyone would watch FOOD, Inc. Each food purchase is a VOTE!

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Posted in connecting

Choosing LIFE

Shower tree at Kokua Market

Shower tree at Kokua Market

Good Morning, God!

I love the words Moses spoke to the children of Israel — I set before you this day Life and Death. Choose Life. For years I had seen this as an either/or question. A no brainer, really! But now I am seeing that really Living is all about choosing. Living is a constant flow of making choices.  Choosing Life in very small things . . . not just large ones.

A More Beautiful Question

A More Beautiful Question

I’m thinking these thoughts, God, because of the book A More Beautiful Question by Waren Berger. He has pointed out that children are overflowing with questions . . . up until they go to school. In school we learn that our job is to learn Answers. As I listened I thought — wouldn’t it be wonderful if we could harness the deep question asking power of young children!

It isn’t that my wonderful Kit and I don’t bicker over small factual questions — only now Kit just says “GOOGLE it!” And then we know. But those are not the DEEP “Whys” of childhood.

This is sad. And I bet You feel that too — as You are the one who designed us to ask questions! Big Questions. Not just the ones we can find answers for on Google.

I guess, God, what I am calling the Big Questions are the ones that lead to Vision. A vision of what Life can be. A vision of what we are Called to be. A vision of what we humans could become — if we were better able to enter into Your Kingdom of Love and Respect.

Proverbs 29:18 says: Without Vision the People Perish. And my heart is singing — Be Thou My Vision . . .

 

 

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Posted in Books, choices, Choosing Meaning, Choosing to respond, connecting, respect

Organic Patterns and the Joy of Creating

Leaves, Branches and Light

Leaves, Branches and Light

Good Evening, God!

I really like random patterns — like this photo of branches and leaves. In Glass Fusion class, everyone else was making beautiful creations that usually involved straight lines. While I — who had temporarily mislaid my ability to cut straight lines — was randomly arranging my odd shaped pieces.

Well, since I was “arranging,” I wasn’t really doing random. But, I couldn’t help but notice my pieces were much closer to random than everyone else’s.

Small green bowl with slightly arranged elements

Small green bowl with slightly arranged elements

I suppose this preference might be related to my being mostly right-brained. Or maybe I just couldn’t come up with a design?

But I noticed the same thing in my metal working classes. While other students made precise pieces — quite lovely — I hunted through the scrap box. It was such a joy to find a rejected piece of copper and think, Aha! I see a FISH — a fish that lives

my deep DEEP sea fish

my deep DEEP sea fish

very deep down in the ocean. Of course, it was too flimsy to wear. But, just a few weeks ago I soldered it on to a brass piece and I am strangely fond of it.

Creating things . . . even when it is more “stuff” than art . . . makes me aware of how much JOY You must get in all that You create. It is an activity that takes us out of Time and into Flow.

If I can take delight in my odd fish, it makes it easier for me to “get” that You, God, take delight in us!

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Posted in appreciation, Art, being a beginner, Being ENJOYED by God, Caring, connecting, Creating, Fun

A glance at the ocean — and at my life

Kailua beach as seen from Buzzes

Kailua beach as seen from Buzz’s restaurant in Kailua

Good Morning, God!

This photo was taken from Buzz’s restaurant in Kailua. A dear friend and I had a lovely lunch after getting haircuts. Before we left, I stopped to admire the ocean at Kailua Beach. Such a lovely color!

Then later that afternoon I got a call from Medicare asking me to respond to a survey — over the phone. I don’t like surveys. But, then I thought, “Hey! They are paying for most of my cataract surgery I’m having tomorrow!” So, I said a reluctant OK.

As the survey went along I got to feeling more and more “privileged.” No, I don’t wait more than one hour to see my doctor. Yes, I can get an appointment when I need it. And when she asked if my doctors treated me with respect, I laughed and said I wouldn’t go to one who didn’t.

Right about then that it began to dawn on me that this isn’t true for an awful lot of other people. Somehow that word respect captured the plight of the poor in a very visceral way. I am at this point in life accustomed to respect.

Wake UP, Margie! A lot of folks don’t get respect — not by doctors, not by employers, not by government officials. And if they try to insist on respect, they are considered “trouble makers”. Worse yet, God, I’m thinking of women who have been so badly treated they don’t even have enough self-respect to expect — let alone insist on — respect from others.

Back to the picture above: I live surrounded by a gorgeous multicolored ocean. I’m a very fortunate person, on many fronts. I am thankful! And yes, God. I remember: those to whom much is given, from them much is required.

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Posted in appreciation, beauty, connecting, gratitude, respect, Responding, responsibility, stopping to see, thankfulness

The Last Cat and Rachel Naomi Remen, MD

Maxx, the Maine Coon Cat of Rachel Naomi Remen

Maxx, the Maine Coon Cat of Rachel Naomi Remen

Good Evening, God!

I haven’t had a cat for years . . . we are still traveling and that’s hard on cats. But, I am definitely more of a Cat Person than a Dog Person.

I think the problem is that Dogs live in a hierarchy and I don’t. Neither do cats. Unless, of course, it is we humans who are the subordinates.

“Dogs have Masters. Cats have Staff!”

This cat (a Maine Coon Cat) lives with Dr. Rachel Naomi Remen who is one of those GOOD people that radiate compassion and wisdom. Hard to beat that combination! I bought her books for the retirement library I was helping at . . . and devoured both of them.

Now she has a webpage which is filled with all sorts of interesting pieces — like the one on the difference between Education and Training.

She is a doctor — a doctor who has experienced illness. I guess that is a really good way to develop compassion — although, illnesses can sweep us out to sea for a while as well.

Anyway, God, I just feel that inspiring people should be shared — and read — and absorbed!

And if they are Cat People — all the better!

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Posted in connecting

Pentecost and me

This is an image to go with Father Meninger’s blog which I’m reposting.

There are lots of images that show the Holy Spirit in her POWER MODE and that’s great!

But as I long for an increased AWARENESS of The Holy Spirit to fill me — I need to be reminded that i need to sit quietly — patiently, waiting. Rather as I would behave to get an ordinary bird to approach me.

The Holy Spirit longs for me to ASK for her help . . . to request her Healing and Cleansing Presence. And to “move over” so she can do her loving thing in me.

So simple. So profound. And all too seldom requested . . . .

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Posted in connecting

Pentecost 2015

A truly RIGHT ON blog by Father Meninger

contemplativeprayer1's avatarMessages from Fr. William Meninger, OCSO

Pentecost May 28, 2015

Three of the most important feast days of the church’s calendar are Christmas, Easter and Pentecost.  Christmas is surrounded by stories, legends, and traditions all addressing the incredible mystery of the birth of the Messiah.  Easter has its own embellishing traditions symbolic of the resurrection.  Pentecost however presents a problem.  In fact it is theologically considered the birthday of the church but there are not the plethora of stories and traditions and symbols that are attached to its celebration as there are to Christmas and Easter.  At the heart of Christmas is the birth of a baby.  At the heart of Easter is the resurrection of a dead man.  At the heart of Pentecost is the descent of the Holy Spirit upon the church with the sound of rushing wind and the sight of tongues of flame.  Humanly speaking, this does not give us much to…

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Blogs I Follow
Brené Brown

chatting and sometimes, listening

Rachel Naomi Remen

chatting and sometimes, listening

A Moment with God

chatting and sometimes, listening

Sacred Dance Guild Journal

Since 1958 articles by members & guests offer news about activities, history, Sacred Dance practices, profiles of Sacred Dancers, choreography, images & illustrations.

Victoria Paulsen

How to Step In -- Substitute Teaching

Brené Brown

chatting and sometimes, listening

Rachel Naomi Remen

chatting and sometimes, listening

A Moment with God

chatting and sometimes, listening

Sacred Dance Guild Journal

Since 1958 articles by members & guests offer news about activities, history, Sacred Dance practices, profiles of Sacred Dancers, choreography, images & illustrations.

Victoria Paulsen

How to Step In -- Substitute Teaching