Rubin Vase image credit: John Smithson
Ah, God, a fresh awareness of what YOU are doing! And it is a gift from You as I heard myself saying it to a friend yesterday morning — and then went back and played it over. . . and over.
I want to change my circumstances — You want to use my circumstances to change me.
This is a major background / foreground shift. And, personally, God I find those shifts difficult, if not unnerving! So I looked for and found my favorite example of a background / foreground shift. The vase on the left is given a 3 dimensional look and so it just looks like a vase. But when the vase is flattened and made two dimensional and the background is turned black — then we can “see” the two faces on either side and the vase just becomes a white background. I’ve always liked that image, that example. But it is disturbing to see it as an example of how You are changing my way of seeing.
So, here I am. I want to do things — want to get my calendar under control — get my papers tossed or filed — finish a few projects. YOU WANT TO WORK ON GROWING ME! I am One of Your Projects! I don’t say that to flatter myself. I think You want to “grow” each and every one of us. That is a very fine abstract idea. The reality of it — pressing at me as it is doing right now — is another matter entirely.
Because in that reality I catch just a glimpse of my falling short — of my failing yesterday to respond to a nudge from You. That hurts. And it should hurt. I DO WANT to grow. I do want to please You. I just need to want it more than I want to take the easy path. Sigh.
Well, Yes, God. We learn best through our failures. That’s a loving word. And, TODAY is a NEW DAY
Story teller,
A Moment with God 
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