Getting on with Life

Posted on November 18, 2012 by a moment with god — Leave a comment

tiny bromeliads (I think)

Good Day, God!

I love this photo for its Brightness and for the gravel walkway next to it. So like my life right now. Mixed.

I sit in the rich soil of life with Roots extended into darkness. What Root knows its purpose? I rather fancy, God, that they go about their business of extracting nutrients from the mud, humus and compost around them — totally unaware of the flowers above ground.

Sigh, above ground . . . in the Light . . . seeing and being seen — knowing. Given a choice I would live just as flower. Yet, what plant can grow — or even live — without roots. So, now I stop to go and sit in silence — at your feet, so to speak. I’m back. . . with More DEEP sighs, God.

I am a whole plant . . . both roots and flowers . . . and lots of leaves. For me, prayer is a way to nourish my roots — and ALSO a source of SunLight for my leaves. You are The Ground of my Being. I like that it takes three overlapping analogies to attempt to describe reality. Thus it was that Jesus said he is the Shepherd, The Gate and the Way.

And now I’m smiling. How good of You to Hear us! We are small and finite. But Beloved. And that makes it possible to love myself and to love others. As John said, “We love because You first loved us.”

Perhaps, that is our sole purpose? Or Soul Purpose? I just hope, God, that when my life is done I don’t find that I have missed the point. It brings to mind the old prayer I said as a child. I just hung the 12×16 embroidery of it done for me as a baby and was surprised by the last verse.

If I should live for other days, I pray thee Lord to guide my ways. May it be so, God!

Tagged with: being a root, being an whole plant, being loved, loving
Posted in acknowledging my need for prayer, Centering Prayer, Choosing Meaning, LOVE, Prayer

Experiencing Awe — in Eclipses, Wee Roses, Medical Matters

Posted on November 15, 2012 by a moment with god — 1 Comment

Diamond ring from the 2009 total eclipse we saw LIVE

Good Morning, God!

Thank You for Total Eclipses — and for the fact that, during one, the Moon exactly “covers” the Sun. I love such improbable details. And how better to appreciate one than to observe in person, as we did on July 22, 2009. It was the longest Total Eclipse of the century! — 6 minutes, 39 seconds. We were aboard a cruise ship in the Pacific, near Iwo Jima. It was my husband Kit’s 75th birthday.

This morning I “watched” an eclipse filmed recently by the BBC in Australia — 2+ minutes of Totality. That brought the subject to mind. Thank You, God!

miniature roses from my car port “garden” on the card table at my Mom’s

Thank You, too, that my mother still marvels at the beauty of the miniature roses that I bring her. Size doesn’t matter when it comes to awe and appreciation.

I had a very different moment of “awe” yesterday. I had gone with two friends to visit a specialist at Queens Medical Center. The doctor’s sense of compassion was palpable. He asked my friend, the patient — let’s call him “G” — to tell the story of his cancer. I brought up a treatment request the patient had made to me earlier. Actually, I brought it up three times — as delicately as I could. “G” had “forgotten” to ask. The doctor said he would discuss it with people who could decide.

Then the doctor asked us again to “introduce” ourselves. When I told him my name he said, “You’re Kit’s wife!” And his face lit up! He knew Kit as a past fellow participant in the Leukemia & Lymphoma Society’s marathon training program. So, Kit’s Good Name got linked with the request for “G’s” treatment.

A very small thing — but awesome. I rejoiced in it!

I suspect that rejoicing — like laughter — doeth good like a medicine!

Tagged with: AWE, medicine, miniature roses, on being with friends during medical conferences, rejoicing, total eclipses
Posted in appreciation, Families, Heavens declare the Glory of God

Retirement: Reorienting and Rebuilding

Posted on November 12, 2012 by a moment with god — Leave a comment

Stephanotis vine growing on a wire grid

Good Day, God!

Thank You for TIME . . . time to do less . . . to rest. Let’s see, it has been over a year since I retired. And I’m still surprised about how Vine-Like I had become.

Like a Vine I was dependent on the Supporting Framework of Work to “hold me up.” Hmm. That is a brand new thought, God. And I like it. Rather, I like discovering that parts of me resemble a vine. Mind You, God, I am not all that pleased at resembling a vine. I prefer picturing myself as a Tree. A Tree like the one described in Psalm One. The Message puts it this way:

A tree replanted in Eden,
bearing fresh fruit every month,
Never dropping a leaf,
always in blossom.

Who wouldn’t prefer being a Tree? But, sitting here pondering it — a tree seems a trifle ambitions. I’m beginning to suspect that as of now, I’m a Vine. And the question is “Will I take personal responsibility for Choosing / Selecting / Constructing my Supporting Grid?”

Life Is To Grow On: The ABC’s of Holistic Growth by Rev, Dr, Margery Williams Terpstra

What Habits do I want to select and build? How do I want to “manage” my attention and my energy? The Habit Factor app isn’t enough. . . ah . . . I just got up and put my hand right on the book I want — in a very full bookcase!

The author, Dr. Margery Williams Terpstra has been a friend and mentor for many years. It’s been years since I read it but it sure feels like it’s time to read it again!

Read it — and interact with it! I want to Journal about it and with it and let it soak into my currently rather amorphous being.

Thanks, God, for the book and the inspiration!

Tagged with: caring for my complete self, finding the right grid, life AFTER retirement, Life Is To Grow On by Margery Williams Terpstra
Posted in a series of molts and upgrades, A Spiritual Spring Cleaning, accepting my need for help, Changing, growing toward up

Flowers as seen by Ms. Chicken Little

Posted on November 11, 2012 by a moment with god — 2 Comments

A flower stall at the Kapiolani Community College Farmers’ Market

Good Evening, God!

Surely the World is a marvelous place, filled with flowers and farmers and sunlight. And, if I keep my eyes focused on flowers and things that are noble and true and right — I’m fine.

The trouble is, God, that I look around me. I look at yards as well as inches. And that is definitely causing me distress. I’m a veritable Chicken Little — only it isn’t that the Sky is Falling . . . it is that the Oceans are Warming.

Warmer Oceans mean an Increased Potential for Storms . . . BIGGER STORMS. And, of course, warmer temperatures mean melting glaciers — especially Greenland — and rising sea levels. It is a clear case of DUH! We have a Problem, here.

Vanity Fair did a great overview on global warming. Why argue if we humans “caused” it when we are certainly adding to it. Actually, I’ve known for years that we were close to the end of an “interglacial Interlude” — so maybe it is partly Just That Time Again, geologically speaking. I guess, God, that what troubles me is How Do We Respond?

My vote for everyone’s Favorite Response is Roll Over and Change the Subject. Angry Denial isn’t far behind. Goodness knows lots of money has gone into Semi-Science saying that global warming is just a theory. Oil companies, anyone? Another response (or non-response) is that IT’S TOO BIG TO DEAL WITH — so, Eat, Drink and be Merry

Some of my fellow believers are saying that it doesn’t matter because Jesus is coming soon. Rapture, anyone? But, God, that feels like turning my back on a situation that deserves our best efforts.

Sigh. I guess what I WANT is that we ALL (the Entire World) Wake Up, Acknowledge Reality, and Work Together on how to deal with it. Clearly, I believe in miracles!

Tagged with: Global Warming, How to Respond, Visible Changes, Wake-up calls
Posted in Choosing to respond, climate changes, Life isn't supposed to be easy.

The Limits of Leadership

Posted on November 5, 2012 by a moment with god — Leave a comment

Queen Celeste from the Babar books

Good Day, God!

I’ve been traveling A LOT this year. So, I’m behind in all sorts of things. One thing was setting up Habit Factors so I could check off the tasks I wanted to do. It got delayed as I pondered my Goals. Hmm. Goals?

It has slowly been becoming clearer to me that all Goals must begin with and be based on deepening my connection with You, God. Taking off the protective chain on the Door of My Heart? TRUSTING YOU?

This seems particularly important just before Election Day. We are electing National Leaders and that’s important! But as I look around I find that I am the Only Candidate for the Leader of My Life. Now, God, as the Irish might put it — YOU are the High King and I report to You. Still, as far as being responsible for me — day in and day out — I’m it! That’s sobering.

What is even more sobering is that a Good Leader is limited in her ability to make things better. Often making things better depends on Lots of Variables. Other People, Perfect Storms, Emergencies, Unexpected Events — all conspire against making things better.

But what is especially sobering is that a Bad Leader has an almost limitless ability to make things worse. This is true nationally and individually. We can become addicts — gambling, alcohol, drugs, even abusing food — plunging our lives into chaos. Or people (like me) can just sort of drift along on the currents of life — taking the easy path.

I don’t want to do that any more, God. But, Oh, I need Your Help! Please help me become a better Queen of my Life. Please, God, help us all — individually and nationally.

Tagged with: Queen of my Life, unlimited downside of leadership, upside limits of leadership
Posted in Heal Us Now, healing, responsibility, Trusting God

Flowers and Frankenstorms

Posted on October 29, 2012 by a moment with god — 1 Comment

White hibiscus with pink edges

Good Evening, God!

Such dreadful weather is battering the East Coast — Hurricane Sandy. Truly a FRANKENSTORM. Five negative forces coming together to make the whole far worse than the sum of their individual forces.

I confess, God, that disasters cut closer to the bone when we have friends involved. We have friends on Cape Cod, in the Bronx, in New Jersey and in Connecticut. Please, God, keep everyone in the path, safe!

Having been evacuated due to a tsunami warning on Saturday — and having lived through a killer earthquake — I know that no area is truly “safe.” We live in a world that is beautiful and beautifully balanced so that we can live comfortably upon it. And we are adaptable — living in the icy Arctic, the steamy jungle, and the scorching deserts. Still, I can’t help but remember reading that warmer average ocean temperatures make for more powerful storms.

Sigh. That is not a happy thought. But, it did move me to get up and turn off my office light. Small steps are really all I can take. Now that I stop to think, God, I guess that is what change is all about. At least, changes we make that last are built slowly. Folks who win lotteries typically are broke, or nearly so, within a year or two.

I need to remember this and Think Small. Putting away my stuff even for just 5 minutes makes a difference in my morale. Weight goes on . . . or comes off . . . ounces at a time. Ounces and Minutes matter! But, they slip past me — unnoticed and under-appreciated.

Hmmm. Maybe I should think in Seconds and Grams? Please, God. Help me Notice and Make — Tiny Choices and Tiny Changes!

Tagged with: Changes, Disasters, Earthquakes and Storms, Tsunamis
Posted in a matter of scale, Changing, our small blue dot, resiliency

A Tsunami Watch . . . While Kit Sleeps

Posted on October 27, 2012 by a moment with god — Leave a comment

Looking out to sea at Camp Mokuleia

Good Evening, God!

Oh my! I took this photo just before dinner tonight — pretty close to the time the earthquake happened off of British Columbia. Shortly after our dinner we got the news that we would have to leave our Women’s Retreat and evacuate from the North Shore.

Instead of going to the Waialua High School evacuation spot Martha Lee and I decided to head for home. I came off the freeway just as the police were closing Kalanianaole Highway. Fortunately, I was able to make a right turn and detour around the closure. So I made it home safely — only to find Kit soundly asleep. Our home phone was out and still is. Had I found Kit awake I would have urged that we go to higher ground.

Now, I’m sitting here — streaming the news on my laptop — and beginning to relax. Still, the experts do say that the first wave is not the biggest. I guess, God, that I really get into these things. I have an Active Imagination. But, I don’t need an imagination — all I need to do is remember the videos I saw of the Japan earthquake. So horrific, God! So horrific.

We live on a moving planet, God. These Tectonic Plates we live on do shift and adjust themselves. Given the huge size of these plate the shifts are proportionately small. The North America Plate stretches from Iceland to the West Coast. Still a few yards movement can have an exponential effect on us humans. Sigh.

I can feel now that my adrenalin levels have dropped. Thank You! I shall creep off to bed . . . to sleep . . . to dream . . . but probably not to be washed away. We are all In Your Hands, God. Thank You!

Tagged with: adrenalin surges, evacuation, tsunami watch
Posted in Perspective, Responding, Risk, thankfulness

A Dose of Perspective

Posted on October 22, 2012 by a moment with god — Leave a comment

An infrared photo showing dust clouds swaddling the stars of the Seven Sisters cluster (Pleiades) Photo: NASA

Good Day, God!

Earlier today I seemed to hear You say that that I was too attached to Outcomes. Then on the way upstairs just now I clearly heard that I need Perspective.

Sigh. You are right God. I do need perspective. For example I need to step back and ponder the stars in the Pleiades being formed 100 million years ago. Actually, that is quite recent as our Earth is 4.54 billion years old.

Scientists think that our species is somewhere around 300,000 – 400,000 years old. Yes, that does put this particular trip around the sun into perspective. Then, too, there are 7 billion people on our planet. That puts me into perspective.

I think most of us 7 billion are pretty mellow. The Ones that worry me are the ones who are totally certain that they are RIGHT. People who are Certain can be led into doing Evil Things for — they think — a Greater Good. Sigh.

Well, yes, God, I do sometimes suffer from Certainty. It makes it hard to remember the command “Bless, Bless and Do Not Curse!” Focusing on Outcomes tends to do that to me, God. My focus needs to be stretched OUT and then pulled BACK to focus on myself. I am responsible for respecting my fellow human beings. I am called to pray for their health and well being — not to argue them into my point of view. Sigh.

So much evil has been done by people in Your Name, God. Inquisitions, witch hunts, pogroms and so forth . . . so depressing. Please help me to focus on the people who are feeding the hungry, ministering to the sick, listening to those around them with love.

Hmm. Please, God, help me grow toward being one of them.

Tagged with: being sure of being RIGHT, Certainty, letting go of outcomes, Respecting others
Posted in choices, Perspective, responsibility, Trusting God

Annunciations, Renunciations and My Warrior Spirit

Posted on October 20, 2012 by a moment with god — Leave a comment

The Annunciation by Fra Angelico from the Art Now and Then blogspot

Good Day, God!

I’m back after doing an hour of Centering (wordless) Prayer this morning. I prayed in a group, which is so much more fruitful than when I pray alone. (Did I just hear a reminder about the importance of being in the Body of Christ?)

I spent my first 30 minutes wrestling with You, God! I wanted You to do what I want. I really care about the various elections coming up and did not want to release the outcomes into Your Hands!

Oh my! How hard it is to TRUST You! It made me think of Mary who gets First Prize in trusting You, God. Still, in looking closely at Mary’s face in Fra Angelico’s painting, I wonder if I am seeing a bit of pain. The Bible makes it sound like her response was an immediate Yes! But, maybe she had a moment’s hesitation?

I admit, God, I’d find it encouraging if she had paused — thinking of Joseph’s reaction. Hmm. In a sense she had to renounce her “good name” as part of accepting the Annunciation. Aaah, God, it comes to me that Renunciations are a Big Part of our relationship with You.

After mostly putting the elections into Your Hands, I had to deal with my Warrior Spirit. Warriors don’t believe in unconditionally Trusting You — considering non-fighters as Not Real People. My Warrior Part had to be offered up (YET AGAIN!) to You.

Sigh. I am such a Hard Case, God! People who trust You — even unto Death — are the Most Real People. They are Lights from Heaven.

Tagged with: Accepting God's Will, Opening my Hands, Renunciations, Trusting
Posted in Centering Prayer, Choosing to respond, Prayer, the JOY of praying together, Trusting God

Hope, Fear and a Fundamental Choice

Posted on October 18, 2012 by a moment with god — Leave a comment

Saint Anne by Leonardo Da Vinci

Dear God,

If I had to give You a human face, God — this would be it. It’s a Grandmother’s face. Da Vinci painted Mary’s mother, Anne, in the act of looking down at her daughter and grandson, Jesus. I’m a grandmother, too, God, so perhaps I’m biased.

You really do LOVE us, God. You love us JUST AS WE ARE . . . which is messy. Your LOVE pervades all of Creation. But we, being judgmental and fearful humans, don’t grasp this. So, Your Angels often begin speaking by saying: FEAR NOT!

FEAR NOT resonates with me. Every day I am given chances to choose: (1) do I curl up in fear . . . or (2) step into HOPE. Other choices: (1) Do I see myself as Under Attack by Enemies (sloth, germs, illnesses, addictions, terrorists, etc)? (2) Or do I see that — even under attack — I CAN CHOOSE TO WORK FOR POSITIVE CHANGES in MYSELF and in my Circles of Influence.

Hmm. Maybe the divide is even simpler than that, God. Do I have faith that You want to help me grow in all aspects of my life? Do I accept personal responsibility and then focus on my body’s fitness, my mental fitness . . . my emotional health?

Aaah, God! I would so much like to look at my family, friends and the world as Saint Anne is looking down at her daughter — as You are looking down at us.

Sigh. I guess this is an ongoing fundamental transformation, isn’t it, God? And it seems to begin with loving and accepting all the diverse (UNLOVED) parts of myself. My assertive Warrior Part wants to look outside me for Enemies. It wants to wage wars. Please, God, help my Warrior Energy turn INSIDE to help me stretch and grow.