The Stanfords — Learning, and Me

Posted on October 22, 2010 by a moment with god — Leave a comment

Leland Stanford Junior and his parents

Good Morning, God!

I had never seen this statue of the Stanford family — but then, I wouldn’t have appreciated it when I was young. If young Leland had lived, there would be no Stanford University. Or, if the story is “true”, if the President of Harvard had been a bit more gracious toward the “Western” visitors, there might just have been a Stanford building on the Harvard campus. Apparently he put Mrs. Stanford’s back up and she asked him how much the WHOLE of Harvard had cost — then turned to her husband and said something to the effect of WE COULD DO OUR OWN UNIVERSITY, DEAR.

Mindset: the New Psychology of Success

The campus is FILLED with buildings named after the living and the dead. Attractive buildings, and all filled with BRIGHT young people — the best and the brightest, God. And that brings me to the talk I attended yesterday by Carol Dweck on Mindsets. I had read her book and wanted to see the author. I am so glad I heard her, God, because I NEEDED to hear her.

In her book, Mindsets, she makes the point that people tend to have either a FIXED mindset — this is just the way I am, I can’t change — or a GROWTH mindset — I can work hard and get help and learn. Sitting there, I realized how easy it is to slip into a FIXED mindset. More to the point, God, I realized I had done that in areas of my life. Saying stuff like, “Oh, I’m not good with details” to take the easy path of not checking carefully. Excuses that let me off the hook of personal responsibility!

As Dr. Dweck said, IT IS NEVER TOO LATE to become a LEARNER — no one has to stay a Non-Learner. Thank You, God, that You are never done with us!

Posted in adoring Easy, choosing HARD, learning, responsibility

Beverly Hills — a deeper look

Posted on October 21, 2010 by a moment with god — Leave a comment

The Beverly Hills City Hall

Good Morning, God!

I was standing outside our European style hotel (read: cheap) and looking over at the Beverly Hills City Hall. I’m very thankful Suz is able to live in Beverly Hills — in a rent controlled apartment. It is so well run! Every interaction Suz has had with them has been positive. So I decided to do a little research. Their bonds are AAA and the highest (along with one other city) ranked in the state of California. Their Library is third in the state and 85th in the nation. Everything is well run — with a concern for the ordinary citizen.

Now, God, why isn’t this the norm? To be sure the property values have to be a lot higher. But, is it just money? And, then God, I get to thinking about money — and numbers. We don’t do numbers well, God. Three is easy. Thirty we can manage. Three hundred is getting big. Three thousand? And when we get to three million or three billion or three trillion we are WAY PAST my imagination’s ability to visualize or handle.

I think that might be why, God, that a BIG number gets confused with an INFINITE number in our minds. Then too, I think that most people think that money is to be used to take care of them. Whereas I have finally come to the view that one of my jobs is to take care of money — to manage it, protect it and deploy it well. Stewardship anyone?

But as one person said about a $540,000 loan from a bank — if someone wants to give you money, it is hard to say no. Ah well, now we are into short term thinking and long term thinking. Sigh. We don’t do TIME any better than we do NUMBERS. I’m here in Silicon Valley, God, thinking our species needs an Upgrade! And SOON!

Posted in asking for help for myself, choosing HARD, growing toward up, living within limits

Olmec Heads, Ignorance, Humility and Me

Posted on October 20, 2010 by a moment with god — 1 Comment

An Olmec Head at the LACMA

Good Morning, God!

An entire Olmec Exhibit at the new Resnick Pavilion at LACMA (Los Angeles County Museum of Art) — Oh Joy! I have been fascinated by the huge Olmec Heads ever since I first saw photos of them years ago. So, it was a delight to be in their presence — to walk around them and ponder them.

They don’t fit into my, albeit sketchy, mental map of Times and Places. They don’t look like the People who followed them, the long headed Mayans and Aztecs. I wanted to ask them WHERE did you come from? Those full sensuous lips — the broad nose — the rectangular head — where else have I seen people like you?

A replica of a mural

The replica of an Olmec mural looks to me so contemporary — more like a cartoon of a man driving some sort of vehicle — perhaps because of the bright colors. Ah, God, the fun of imagining.

I like wondering, God. I like knowing that I DON’T know. I think back to the Chinese fleet that set sail in 1491 and rounded Africa before returning home. Learning about THAT was a surprise.

Mostly I go through my days thinking I know — thinking I know the basics at least. So finding giant gaps in my mental maps, while unsettling, is stimulating.

Another word would be humbling. It is humbling to discover how MUCH I don’t know. One big problem with ignorance — is that we don’t know we don’t know. So, God, I NEED more “exhibits”, more surprises, more of this sort of stimulation. Please, God, help me be more AWARE of the depth of my ignorance.

Posted in humility

The Hammer Museum, Dr. Pozzi and Capitalism

Posted on October 19, 2010 by a moment with god — 2 Comments

About to enter the Hammer Museum in L.A.

Good Morning, God!

Thank You for small serendipitous moments! One of them was when Suz and I stumbled upon the Hammer Museum on a Thursday night — a night when it was both open late and free! Even better, in the few minutes we had, we were able to soak in the incredible paintings in the Hammer Collection. Rembrandts, Cezannes, a Titian and then John Singer Sargent’s Dr. Pozzi at home — a study in red.

Dr. Pozzi at home by John Singer Sargent

I looked at him with a start of recognition! Here was the Face of . . . Lucifer? Or was it the creator of Facebook? Timeless, yet ever so symbolic of The Principleless Modern Man.

Sigh, Gosh God, we don’t change, do we? Or should I say that we are all too malleable and that makes us easy prey to the FORCES loose in the World. I just finished reading an article on the moratorium on Bank Foreclosures — the point of which seemed most unsettling. Apparently, they can’t legally foreclose as — in order to avoid taxes, fees and regulations — they don’t actually have title to individual properties. It is, of course, FAR more complex than that — but it does seem as if Creativity in the Service of Profit can ooze toward the Criminal.

So here we are, God! In a fantastically productive system called Capitalism — one that is always pushing toward MORE. Hmmm. Timothy Keller called Greed the only one of the Seven Deadly Sins than no one feels they are guilty of. Alas, I can’t help thinking God, that the corporations that bring us our FOOD are the same ones bringing Cigarettes. How extensive and intertwined are the Corporate influences on our lives!

Posted in beauty, complexity, food questions, Help me to see, setting my life in context

Inner and Outer Worlds — Meeting in Your Compassionate Presence

Posted on October 18, 2010 by a moment with god — Leave a comment

St. James in the City (Los Angeles) Episcopal Church

Good Morning, God!

Kit arrived yesterday morning, EARLY — earlier even than we had “planned.” So I quickly dressed and Kit and I went off to Peet’s for a much appreciated coffee, while Suz slept for a few more minutes. So I shifted from Mother to Wife and then Suz joined us for the 10L30 a.m. service at St. James — in which we all became Your Children — for a few lovely moments.

I WANTED to take photos while inside the church, God! The stained glass windows cried out to be “taken home” to be admired and shared. The worshipers, too, from around the world — Africa, Korea and of course, the elderly of English descent would have been a joy to “capture.”

But other things can only be experienced. Even now, I can FEEL the warmth of the Passing of the Peace — feel the joy of joining hands with one another in Your Compassionate Presence.

Aaaah, and God, I haven’t even mentioned the music! The organ with its pipes fore and aft — the choir that entered — circumnavigating the church — filling both the sanctuary and our hearts with music. And the etherial sound of Palistrina soaring above us as we took communion.

The highlight from the sermon was when the minister suggested that perhaps You, God, are acting the part in the parable of the Widow — while we take the part of the judge — that You are the One pressing us for JUSTICE. Yikes! That rang TRUE.

And, God, as for the melding of the Roles in my life? I am happy to say that I am taking a bit more of an Active Role as Myself. Old roles are just that — roles. As Your Children we are called to Write our Lives FRESH.

Posted in A God given diversity, accepting my ability to REDESIGN, being together in a compassionate presence, interactions, New Creatures in Christ, Ongoing Transformation

Doors: Portals to Other Times and Places

Posted on October 17, 2010 by a moment with god — Leave a comment

Gavrinis -- a tumulus on an island off of Brittiney

Good Morning, God!

Here I am, signed in as a guest member of The Megalithic Portal webpage. It all started from looking up Tumulus and the next thing I knew I was looking at Gavrinis and way back in TIME. Back to the Time of Stonehenge and the Tor at Glastonbury. These are such old sites — maybe 4,000+ years ago.

I have not been to Gavrinis, but I even entered one of these sacred chambers — like Gavrinis on the main Orkney Isle. I remember that they told us that you could see the sun rise on midsummer’s day at the end of the long tunnel in the small womb-like chamber — I was impressed then and I’m still impressed.

The Glastonbury Tor

And speaking of impressed — I think back to my experience with the ley lines at the Tor of Glastonbury. Kit and I were driving west from Stonehenge when I saw the Tor (hill) off in the distance. I HAD to see it.

We climbed the 521 foot hill to the old stone tower and we were met by an unofficial guide. He told us how this had been almost entirely surrounded by water at the time of Christ. Aaah, but, God, what fascinated me was his demonstration of the ley lines! He handed it to me and I felt the copper dowsing “wire” pull down as I walked across the ley line. I did it twice — the second time I was determined it wouldn’t move — but it did!

It seems a lot of the ancient sacred places are supposed to be built on ley lines. Now why aren’t “reputable” scientists studying ley lines? Or, is it that when one studies them, one ceases to be “reputable?” We don’t like things that don’t “fit” do we God,

Posted in doors and doorways, time

Dining in Little Tehran with my Daugher

Posted on October 16, 2010 by a moment with god — 2 Comments

dining at the Flame Restaurant -- next to the old style oven

Good Morning, God!

It was Goodbye Tucson and Hello Little Tehran — or Tehrangeles as the hub of the half million Iranians in Los Angeles is called. Suz and I picked the Flame Restaurant and asked for the table set next to the old style oven and over-ordered dinner — with lunch the next day in mind.

Such a layering of Cultures and Times, God. I think I was sitting next to an engraving on a glass pane of a Persian King and cuneiform writing. The oven looked like it might well have been used to cook for that king. But, in this photo are images of TVs and also reflections of the TVs placed in every corner of the restaurant– AND in the women’s bathroom — of all things.

The complex and vibrant layering in this photo feels like an image of my travels. First, Suz, then Sandy and the Boys, then the Boys, then Sandy, Dave and the Boys and now Suz again. I have a mind and heart full of images and vignettes.

But, back to the restaurant and the food — it was just what I wanted — fresh herbs and chicken in a walnut and pomegranate sauce. Pomegranates, again, God, reminding me that I still haven’t finished the book, Traveling with Pomegranates. It is a book in which Sue Monk Kidd layers mother daughter relationships along side her relationships with You, God. And, perhaps, that deep primal relationship takes us as close as we can come to understanding / experiencing Your Love for us.

Tomorrow morning, EARLY, Kit arrives and my Mother/Daughter travels will morph into Travels with Kit. Another facet of LOVE to experience, appreciate and treasure.

Posted in appreciation, daughters, LOVE, people as gifts, relationships, thankfulness, the joy of sharing, the layers of life

Bittersweet Sunsets and Goodbyes

Posted on October 15, 2010 by a moment with god — Leave a comment

A Tucson Sunset - while riding down Broadway

Good Morning, God!

What an altogether marvelous time I had in Tucson! While there I read Jon Katz latest book — about a border collie on a sheep farm — and it is such a perfect analogy for my stay. Not, God, that I was the sheep dog, no way.

I was the sheep! Mark was the sheep dog . . . a Border Collie for sure. This dawned on me as Sandy, Mark and I were driving to the airport after a breakfast at the Good Egg. [Ian WAS planning on going with us — but he couldn’t wait quite that long to eat — so opted to stay home.]

Mark has this way of verbally nipping — designed to round me up and move me in the Right Direction. At one point, Sandy said “I NEVER would have talked to my grandparents that way!” And, of course, neither would I. But, I felt, God, that Mark saw me as a real person — and while I obviously needed improving — I felt very loved.

Of course, God, I nipped back and for the most part we enjoyed the bickering. Roles are all very well. But how much better to be seen as a real person. I felt that was also the case with Sandy. I don’t mean to imply that the “role” disappeared — rather it was subsumed into a wider deeper appreciation of each other as we are. Thanks, God! Thank You for helping us all to see and love each other as we are!

And now, God, I am smiling ruefully. Because I dimly sense that I did better this time around. Hmmm. I had no goals — nothing I wanted to “help” anyone with — it seemed more than enough —this loving people and myself as we are.

Posted in Expand my Heart, family visits, LOVE, respect

Saint Anne, the Patron Saint of Grandmothers

Posted on October 14, 2010 by a moment with god — Leave a comment

St. Anne, holding Mary in her lap

Good Morning, God!

Sandy has taken Ian to school and is now biking. I am back into my book – Traveling with Pomegranates — and have just come upon the idea of St. Anne — the mother of Mary — as the patron saint of grandmothers! And better yet, I just found this image of her with Mary in her LAP! Zounds! Isn’t that EXACTLY what I want! To place my beloved daughter on MY LAP — knowing that she will forever be holding HER child.

How completely “sanitized” the Old Catholic Church was by the Protestant Men. How striped of WOMEN and IMAGES and COMPASSION. (Isn’t that a little harsh, Margie? some voice asks). Maybe. But surely, the full reality of Women — except as Virgins, Maternal Virgins — was removed. Sad? Yes, but far more than simply sad. Evil, is the word for what has been done to women.

And, now, God, I am thinking back to the word Self — how it was split into Selfless or Selfish — two minor, if essential, parts of a much bigger whole. That seems the clearest analogy for what was done to WOMAN — Virgin or Wanton — Wife or Mistress — Object of Desire or Invisible.

Is this a RANT? Perhaps. I am sitting here — thinking of how some types of mushrooms are just visible expressions of a vast underground network of the “real” mushroom. I am seeing each of us, each woman, as not just an individual, but as an expression of an unseen — and vast — WHOLE.

But, God, let me back off from Gender Universes — and return to my small corner of the Cosmos — I love the idea and image of St. Anne. And I am smiling as Anne is my middle name. Aaah, God. Prod us — prod us women — into awareness. More than that, even, Please prod us ALL — men and women — into becoming AWAKE.

Tagged with: A patron saint for grandmothers
Posted in gender universes, Roots, setting my life in context, the gift of persistent love, the importance of Grandmothers

An Asteroid Flyby – And Things that go Bump in the Night

Posted on October 13, 2010 by a moment with god — Leave a comment

An asteroid flyby Oct. 12

Good Morning, God!

O.K., so it was a SMALL asteroid that just missed us yesterday. Still, God, I don’t care much for the “idea” of asteroids coming between us and our moon. And when I looked at this chart it seemed a lot closer to us than to the moon, just 28,000 miles away.

Now, the article about it did say that it was only 5-10 meters in diameter and would have burned up in our atmosphere. But, with 30,000,000 undiscovered asteroids out there! I must say, I am glad that Cal Tech’s JPL is running The Near-Earth Object Observations Program, commonly called “Spaceguard.”

The thing is, God, that article reminds me our our vulnerability. Our planet HAS been hit by asteroids — BIG ones — and it WILL be hit again. I suppose knowing that is sort of like knowing that the super volcano underneath Yellowstone is due. We know it the way we know planes crash — or more to the statistical point — cars crash. Yet, we get up and drive hither and yon without much perceptible worry.

But, back to the asteroids. What WOULD we do, God, if we saw a BIG ONE coming toward us? What would we do if we could predict major earthquakes? Or, if we knew the date of our own death? YUCK.

And, if knowing is hard, God, what about deciding? Doctors used to be taught to tell their patients as little as possible. The doctors made the decisions. Now the right and responsibility to decide is placed on the patient. But many choices are between things that are basically unbearable. Parents forced to make decisions like that for their children may suffer for years.

Hmmm. How is it I have gone from Knowing to Deciding to Suffering? And, now I “hear” my earthly father saying “Life isn’t supposed to be easy” and I am Thankful, God, that my life hasn’t been harder!

Posted in choices, decision making, fears, thankfulness